To be irritated by the suggestion that their impending ivf baby is 'more precious'?

[DorotheaHomeAlone]

DH and I have been very lucky in the fertility stakes and I have conceived two babies easily in the past two years and carried both to term.

A couple of other family members have unfortunately experienced miscarriages and BIL and his wife have recently conceived after 2+ years of infertility and treatment. We are obviously thrilled for them. They've always been very supportive and involved with our kids and we hope to return the favour.

But another member of DH's family has made several comments over Christmas about how great it is that BIL and his wife are the ones having a baby 'and not DH and Dorothea again'. Also how extra 'precious' and 'loved' this new baby will be.

We only have 2! And I am really irritated by the insinuation that we have jumped the queue by having a second while they were trying unsuccessfully or that our babies are less precious because they were easily conceived.

Didn't say anything obviously but can't see the need for these divisive comments.

Dear OP, I am absolutely with you. YANBU. Whether described as really precious, very precious or extra precious, there seems to be an implication the there is some difference between children born without too much of a struggle and those who needed additional effort. I not only have found this irritating but insulting. However you will never convince those who believe it is ok to use such phrases to a devoted mum or dad who love and value their children 100%. Certainly we are all pleased for parents who manage to conceive against the odds but surely our enthusiasm should be for the parents delight/relief and not to the suggestion that their child is extra precious....unless of course one doesn't understand the concept of 100%....in which case one is a football pundit.

YANBU to feel irritated. Whilst I think that that perhaps the pregnancy itself may be more "precious" to them than it is to you, once the babies are born there will be no difference in the love you feel. I would feel quite insulted by the comment that it is great that the other couple rather than you are pregnant.