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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask you for ideas on how to tell my DH I'm pregnant on Christmas Day?

233 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 12/12/2016 11:44

This is clearly not an AIBU but I'm shamelessly posting because of all the traffic and because I'm excited!!

I found out two days ago that I'm pregnant and I want to find a way to tell DH on Christmas Day.

I had thought about gift wrapping a pregnancy test but now that just seems boring?

Then I thought of having a customised bauble made with the words "I'm pregnant" engraved on it for him to unwrap.

Then I thought about wearing some kind of t-shirt/jumper with a message on it to indicate I'm pregnant and see how long it takes DH to notice it...

I just don't know.

Are there any creative people out there with some good suggestions? Or maybe someone who has done it themselves and would like to share?

OP posts:
Writerwannabe83 · 12/12/2016 11:56

We had an early miscarriage in February and my DH was really upset. I said from then on that if I ever got pregnant again I would keep it to myself for a few weeks just to make sure things seemed to be ok before telling him. Last time I miscarried two weeks after my BFP so in my head I was always going to keep quiet for a fortnight or so anyway so it's perfect timing that I've found out two weeks before Christmas.

My DH will love having the news as a surprise!!

I'm just going to have to cross my fingers that I don't have any severe symptoms in the next two weeks that will lead him to click on Grin

OP posts:
Thisjustinno · 12/12/2016 11:57

Congratulations! Read Lagunas post though.

PixieMiss · 12/12/2016 11:58

Get him a Xmas card "from the bump".

Still a christmassy surprise but a little sooner and more intimate (can do it at home alone). Something nice to keep as well Smile

PaulAnkaTheDog · 12/12/2016 11:58

Did you discuss keeping it to yourself with him though?

someonestolemynick · 12/12/2016 11:59

I'm afraid I am also in the 'tell him asap' camp. Sorry.

It will just be hugely impractical if he doesn't know. It could just be something silly like him bringing back a bottle of wine as a treat for you. Something might go wrong and you end up having to go to hospital.

Congratulations on your good news.FlowersCake

PoldarksBreeches · 12/12/2016 12:01

It's not joyless, just pointing out that he may not appreciate her keeping it secret for weeks. I'm really sorry for your miscarriage but what are you thinking will happen if got forbid you lose this one? You never tell him? You're a team and that means you share the joy and the sadness when sadness comes. Keeping it a secret isn't fair. By all means tell him in a cute way but do it soon.

Goingtobeawesome · 12/12/2016 12:01

If you miscarry again that's a sad way to tell him and he's missed out on the excitement of knowing there is a baby coming. Miscarriages can happen at any time sadly.

SouthWindsWesterly · 12/12/2016 12:02

Congratulations!!! Is he a geek? Does he like Dr Who? How about a daddy's little time lord vest?

Writerwannabe83 · 12/12/2016 12:02

It's crazy because prior to this thread I was REALLY excited about telling him on Christmas Day but now so many people have said "Tell him" I'm feeling even more excited about the idea of simply telling him and I just want to do it now instead, haha Grin Grin

OP posts:
SootSprite · 12/12/2016 12:02

I don't think it joyless to say that the father has a right to know straight away. Even with your update OP, I don't think it's right for you to keep this from him. I'd be gutted if my dh kept something important hidden from me for two weeks.

PeppaPigTastesLikeBacon · 12/12/2016 12:02

What is he into OP? Maybe it can be incorporated with something he likes? Or do matching Christmas jumpers for Christmas morning. He unwraps them and the third is a tiny baby sized one for next year?

primarynoodle · 12/12/2016 12:02

I think it's lovely as an idea but only if you're sure he wouldn't be upset you didn't tell him sooner - congratulations and so sorry for your previous loss, fx for a sticky bean!

If you can't wait then I think posting a card through the door addressed to him to open from 'bump' is a great idea from pp, alternatively I think a babygrow with 'I love my daddy' or similar for xmas morning to open :)

Thisjustinno · 12/12/2016 12:03

Yes, tell him today!

WhitePhantom · 12/12/2016 12:03

Congrats on your pg!

Sorry to hear you had a m/c in Feb. Did you not need his support when that happened - ie. if it happened again (sorry - hopefully not!) would you not need his support? I think that would be an awful way to find out! "DH, I was pg but didn't tell you the happy news. Now I've bad news and I want you to be there for me".

I really couldn't imagine keeping news like that from my DH - we both looked at the stick together so found out at exactly the same time. It's as much his as yours - why would you keep it from him??? But each to their own I suppose.

Writerwannabe83 · 12/12/2016 12:03

Fu*k it - I'm going to tell him tonight!!! He's going to have a heart attack!

OP posts:
PurpleDaisies · 12/12/2016 12:03

I can't understand your thinking on keeping any pregnancies to yourself in case any thing goes wrong.

Wouldn't he want to support you if you had a miscarriage? Are you going to lie to the midwife when they ask you how many times you've been pregnant before if he didn't know about one? Doesnt he have a "right" to know he's also lost a baby? Confused

Sorry for your prior loss and good luck with this pregnancy. I seriously think you should tell your dh.

Underparmummy · 12/12/2016 12:04

I would not be able to keep this a secret for 2 weeks! DH would also notice the lack of wine consumption!

sashh · 12/12/2016 12:04

I'd buy knitting needles, yarn and a pattern and wrap them up for him, he will initially think WTF?

Maybe include a note saying 'You have 8.5 months to knit this"

Or cufflinks with a stork on, see how long it takes for him to get the message. www.1stchoicecufflinks.com/stork-multi-personalised-v2-green-cufflinks?___store=choicecufflinks_europe&gclid=CMixrPHN7tACFeuw7Qoddx8Dqg

Underparmummy · 12/12/2016 12:05

I have woken DH up at 5am before to shove positive tests in his face...

PurpleDaisies · 12/12/2016 12:05

Cross posted. Good decision. Smile

Underparmummy · 12/12/2016 12:05

Sorry, just seen last post!

BertrandRussell · 12/12/2016 12:06

I honestly think you need to tell him- if the worst happens you will have to tell him then anyway and surely the sadness is something you feel together?

I think I might be upset that you'd kept it from me if I were him.

You could still do something Christmassy- just do it now.

MikeUniformMike · 12/12/2016 12:06

It's too early for present from bump. Tell him now or at least give him a massive hint.
Best wishes with the pregnancy.

Jellybean83 · 12/12/2016 12:06

Congratulations Flowers

It may be a bit boring and predictable but I like the gift wrap pregnancy test idea, I'd have to do an early Christmas present though.... no way could I keep such big news to myself for that long I'd be itching to tell him.

CostaAddict · 12/12/2016 12:08

I bought a small gift box and put an I love daddy sleepsuit and the hundred pregnancy tests I done in it.

It was fantastic and we still have the box! Even better when we got a pic of now DS wearing the sleepsuit as a newborn.

Congrats! Flowers

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