user 14800000000000
Oh are we pretending that on AIBU that we don't make judgments? Yeah I am not going along with that pretense user. You go for it.
I make a judgement in the op's favour, unlike many people with their smug judgments of her being flaky for considering turning the job down. She did not feel confident that she could arrange childcare and she came on here to get some advice but I am amazed how very negative so many have been about the possibility she considered. Coming to a decision involves considering all the choices and it was R of her to consider not taking the job if she could not find childcare she felt satisfied with. How is it going to serve her having a job long tern with a shift pattern that creates a child care problem? Let's not even get into the fact she may be working that shift for nothing in return by the time she pays for childcare- why should she do that? I would find another job where I do not have to find evening cover. So feeling anxious is an understandable response.
Frankly I find the judgment from people on here who seem to think that working full time and parenting at the end of the day for a short part of the day is somehow so worthy and even superior- all the lines that get trotted out about how great it is to work and set an example to your kids.
What is so great about working instead of parenting? When did stay home parenting become something that is considered less worthy when parenting is for most the most significant work you will ever do? Personally I have a lot of respect for the parents who find a way to stay home and I realize not everyone can do it and many don't want to do it. Of course we live at a time in history when everyone is encouraged to do what is right for them, rather than right for anyone else in the situation.
I applaud the OP for worrying about someone else's welfare in the face of something that represented an opportunity for her- she was not being flaky. She was having the natural reaction of a parent assessing the needs of her child and herself. Glad you worked it out OP-if you had not, finding a different job would have been a perfectly reasonable choice.
As a teacher I cannot tell you how many times I read in students' journals how much they long to spend time with their parents but....they then tell me that their parents are always at work. But hey ho what a fine example they are setting for their children who must long to grow up and be able to model such a glorious work ethic for their own children.
I work full time and I don't pretend it is the ideal situation. I know my children would love to spend more time with me and their father and I am always open to changing my job if I can eliminate the inevitable childcare issues that can arise depending on the job and shifts offered. So yes I will cheer lead the OP considering that option and it is unsettling how many on here seem to think that some job trumps the OP's child's needs and the OP's needs to feel ok with the childcare option, that taking up a specific job entails.