To be fucked off with in laws always asking me?!

[NickNacks]

DH owns a mobile phone.

In laws even have his number.

He answers and replies to messages to that number.

However every question is directed at me? What shall we get the dc for Christmas being the latest one. Argh. Ask him! I can't imagine for one second my aunt or brother or mum texting DH to ask our plans for new year. Isn't it sexist? Aibu?

evyertime just say i have no idea-keep repeating

It's not a "big fuss about nothing". It is yet another job for the female (usually) partner to have to give headspace to.

'But would all these men actually know what their DC want for Christmas? Surely they'd have to come and ask you anyway?'

I can't decide if you're joking or not.

My MIL is like this. She also says things like 'at least you get a rest while toddler's in nursery' to me (never my husband). No it's not a rest because I am at work when she's at nursery!! I also get asked about my cleaner as she clearly cleans to help me and not both of us.

What Aderyn2016 said.

Do you have nothing more important to take issue with?

He is a loving, involved dad, who busts his arse to get home for parent's evenings, helps the kids with hwk, takes them to the park, talks to them and is fully a part of their lives

I find it quite odd that those things can all be true but he wouldn't be able to answer questions about their current interests or what sort of things they might like. It has very little to do with being good at shopping. No shopping is required, just a basic 'she's currently into x, y and z, and is desperate for an emu.' It's knowing your kids.

DH and I will bounce ideas off each other when responding to family requests for gift ideas, but we'd both find it deeply weird if one of us was the 'default' person for family to ask what the kids would like.

'My dh hasn't got a clue about the kid's Christmas presents and I object to someone calling him an asshat because of it'

Surely he knows enough to say 'Jim
likes Lego City and Joan loves Play Doh'

You don't mind Navy, but op clearly does.

My DH compiled the list of presents because he plays with the kids, so knows what they like and he has asked them what they want to put in their letters to Father Christmas. It doesn't exactly take superhuman effort.

Navy, I appreciate that your husband might not have the headspace with running a business but why the assumption that therefore no normal man would? There is no problem with it being your job in your family but that isn't a reason why it should therefore be the default for everyone!

Maybe the OP is running a 'pretty big business'. I've heard a rumour that having a willy isn't essential to be economically active & some non willy owners actually have more to do with their days than shop for bargains.

My mil would definitely text me first but that's because we're always texting and chatting anyway.

I love choosing and buying presents so once dh and I have discussed what to buy I always say I'll go and get it.

Personally I don't have an issue with being asked about presents for dd or dh but if others do then they need to be blunt and tell their in laws.

And I find it a bit odd that people's in laws don't have their mobile numbers. If nothing else then just for practical reasons and emergencies. I don't think my dh and my parents ever ring or text but they definitely have each other's numbers.

The irony that indeed I do run my own business. Penis not required for that one.

Agree with just callmekate

NickNacks are you really upset your in-laws want to buy gifts for your children? Can you not simply say I don't kjnow what my kids want.

Or is that actually not true, and like me you have more idea what your kids want than what your dh?

Either way, either tell them or tell them you don't know.

I know what my kids want because I spend more time with them, I work part-time and get to sit through kids tv with them. My dh works full time so doesn't have a clue. I make lists.

I'm a feminist. If the being asked offends you then direct them to your dh with a smile.

I'm divorced and my ex-MIL STILL asks me what the DCs want!!! Speak to your son!!! Grrrrr...

Having your own company is great, and maybe means you get more time at working from home and get to hear what they want? I'd treat it not as offensive that they ask you, just that they ask you. So yes, unreasonable but I know where you are coming from.

NickNacks are you really upset your in-laws want to buy gifts for your children?

Yes, that is exactly what OP said.

Intentionally goats nonsense.

Is it a big business though, NickNacks Or just a lady sized one for pin money that leaves you headspace ?

No he isn't a stay at hope dad and no I'm not upset that they want to buy my children presents - where did I say I did? What I do have a problem with is them directing their enquiries to me instead of their own son/ brother/ nephew etc. He doesn't get it either.

Goady, not goats!

I have no idea what kind of nonsense goats indulge in. It may well be GF posts on MN...