Help. Desperate to give up teacher training.

[PamplemousseRouge]

Hi everyone.

I've posted here a couple of times before about my situation.

I'm training to be a teacher, and I'm struggling massively, to the point where I'm constantly seriously depressed and honestly struggle to find a point to still being here. Sorry this is so clumsily said - I hope I get the idea across.

I started training in August, and have been feeling overwhelmed, depressed and anxious since then.

I feel that it's relevant to add here that I also have extremely low self-esteem and low self-confidence.

I've never felt like this on such a regular basis. The depression, anxiety and inferiority that I feel is something that I've felt very day since starting, and it's never ever been so bad as now.

I also feel a huge sense of frustration, as I feel that I'm putting in a huge amount of effort but I still run out of hours in the day to get everything done. And I haven't been able to find time to look after myself properly, which I'm sure is also adding to my general feeling. I feel constantly tired, hungry and absolutely worn-out.

I'm seriously considering giving up. This sounds terrible, I know.

I'm wondering if I could look for another job at this stage? As in a non teaching job. And what my options are really. I'm particularly worried that companies and employers will overlook me once they see that I haven't completed teacher training and gave it up just three months in. Help.

I'm really, really struggling.

Any advice at all about how to help?

I've been to see my GP, who's said they'll reference me for counselling but I am still waiting to hear back about this.

Just feeling so completely down.

Exactly to all the comments about having to like teaching. I've done teaching (not academic, sports and health related subjects as well as IT training) and I thoroughly enjoy the process especially the more difficult the person finds it to understand, the better! The easy pupils are just that - easy - I get real enjoyment out of helping someone who finds it difficult to understand or to achieve the goal that's required for that particular topic. Do you actually enjoy that process of teaching?

Not having been a school teacher I can't comment directly but it's for sure that what the Govt/Ofsted want changes by the week and that's difficult enough for experienced teachers, let alone for those training and just starting out.

If you can say that yes you really do enjoy teaching perhaps there are other areas where the teaching is more 'soft' ie not so in yer face being a teacher in a secondary school but teaching music or teaching something else or in a different environment.

It was interesting to me (albeit it was Early Years-related) to see teachers teaching in that age range in Norway and when asked what academic attainment etc were they trying to achieve with their say 5 year olds. The answer? We just want them to be happy. And that was it!!

I dare say it would be a lot different in a country like that, or, in a setting where the pupils are respectful and wanting to learn etc.

I think it sounds like your parents have begun to understand it's a bit more serious than they may first have thought - because of your tendency to push yourself you probably need to make sure that you are really honest with m & d when you see them about how it's come to such an incredibly serious point so that they understand how you are really at the edge - they won't be able to support you if you underplay it.

But for now your health is absolutely the overriding priority and if getting out quickly is what will make you feel like a weight has been lifted and enable you to start de-stressing and feeling hopeful again, then that's what you need to do.

You may be tied to the three teacher resignation dates, if so a resignation tendered now will mean you actually leave at Easter, it is worth checking this

This is true, but leaving dates are not set in stone. The reality is that you can walk from any job whenever you want (well unless you're in the army that is) although it is usually better to negotiate a date if you need to leave early.

Presumably if OP was told well you can't leave til Easter she would simply go to her GP and advise the details and severity of their health issues and they would be able to give her a sick note so she didn't have to keep going in and put herself at risk?

Well quite Pollyanna and they would then let her leave if she so wished at any time.

Definitely - she shouldn't stay beyond the end of this term from what I'm reading.

Oh good - I'm glad that it's definitely an option if it's needed - they might be saying oh go on you can do it for a bit longer/til Easter and she feels she's a bit stuck with having to carry on beyond when is good for her health/when she wants to finish

Thank you everyone! :) Such great advice on here. You're all brilliant.

I was actually just reading another thread on here written by teachers about why there's a recruitment crisis in teaching. All of the reasons mentioned in the thread really sounded familiar to me.

It's now got to the stage where I feel constantly on edge and nervous, and as if I'm about to have a panic attack. I really feel it's best to get out sooner rather than later.

In terms of my resignation, it turns out that my training provider, and not my school, is in charge of triggering the resignation process.

I spoke to one of my tutors at my training provider, and they mentioned that they would let me know about the resignation process by tomorrow.

The other thing is that I am not on a salaried scheme with my training provider but on a bursaried scheme. (I don't get paid a salary directly from my training provider but instead I get a bursary from the government). Because of this, I don't actually have a formal written contract from my training provider about the resignation process or dismissal process, or anything like that.

Just for my own peace of mind, I'm wondering then if it's worth me contacting my union? I joined a union earlier this month, so I'm just wondering if I should contact them to ask whether they might be able to tell me when I'm able to resign? Or should I just wait for my training provider to get back to me?

So what would be the actual consequence
Of resigning and saying I am leaving tomorrow if you are a trainee teacher? None of any consequence I would imagine

greenfolder in all honesty, I have no idea at the moment what the consequence would be.

Also, on a (fairly important) side note, I will need to look for a job after resigning. Is it unreasonable for me to ask my school for a reference, bearing in mind I'll have only been there since September? WWYD? If I can still ask them for a reference, I would really rather do everything by the book and keep everyone on my good side.

Anyone? :)

I don't know how you would go about asking for a reference. Did you have a personal tutor?

Thanks BeingATinsel - yes I do have a personal tutor, that's a good idea.

References are factual and brief. Usually it is literally did pample work there on the dates she said. If you are honest about the dates and why you left, I can't see that there would be any problem. The standard reference forms these days are pretty short. It will give the school a small problem but that is their problem and in all honesty I would imagine if you resign immediately then they can recruit and budget for cover staff.

I have just re read. If you do not have a written contract which outlines notice then I think you just crack on and negotiate in that case. When do you want to leave? How does the bursary work?

Thanks green folder. Ideally, I'd like to leave as soon as possible. With the bursary, I'll be paid the monthly instalments from it for as long as I stay in the job. So for example, if I leave now, I won't be paid my next monthly instalment. Which I understand is completely fair.

Not read the whole thread but this could have been me. I stuck at it, I failed. I needed to pay rent and had to find a job sharpish! If you hate it so much look for a job then leave when you have one - no gap in employment or cash flow. The pgce destroyed my confidence mainly as my tutor was a cow and a male tutor didnt like me - I know how mardy this sounds! If I hadnt needed the bursary I would have left within the first placement and 5 years on I wouldnt have needed to rebuild my confidence to such an extent

Okay. Time to bite the bullet.

I'd be very interested to know - does anyone have any experience at all of working for - or being trained with - the training providers Teach First or Ark?

In my opinion, they are both very similar. I would be very interested to hear what you think of them.

You should have no issues with just not going in. I walked out - has never caused me any problems whatsoever. You can get a reference from your tutor, and previous degree tutor. They can't say anything more negative than, she wasn't happy. That's not a slight on your character. You aren't a slave you know!

I'm so sorry to hear that user. If you don't mind me asking, how long into your PGCE did you leave?

The other option is disengage, know you are leaving and so concentrate on getting another job. It no longer matters to you what they think but you keep the bursary until you leave.

Anyone? :)

Bump :)

Teach First are similar to what you've just experienced - a short period of training followed by intense work in a very challenging school. I'm not sure given your mental state that it would be appropriate and you would possibly be also rejected at the application stage.

noblegiraffe I asked about Ark and Teach First because I'm actually training with Ark, whose model is extremely similar to Teach First. It's based on Teach First. But it's been around for much less time than Teach First.

I personally think these models are unsustainable and place far, far too much pressure on trainees. And unfortunately this is something that I only learnt in hindsight.