To expect to be fed at a kid's birthday party?

[Lalunya85]

Took my two DC aged 2 and 1 to a birthday party this weekend. The party was for a girl turning 3, organised by her parents who are close friends of my DH.
First part of the party was at a playground in a local park, second half at home. We were invited for 11 till 4pm. It took us 1.5 hours each way to travel to the party.

Day before the party they rang to say that we should bring snacks for the park. Fine, we got some baguettes, humus, fruit etc. Around 6 families were there, all with one or two kids. Assumed everybody would share snacks in the park. Turned out that nobody was sharing, so we just ate our own snacks which we thought was odd but fine.

Then we all transferred to their home at around 2pm. It was freezing and everybody was cold. Kids were hungry. At their house they served water. And when I asked we got a cup of tea. But that was literally it.

It was a fun party otherwise, but is it the done thing to not offer ANY food at a kid's birthday party??

Disclaimer: both my partner and I are from different countries so are now wondering whether this is an English thing? Have we been overfeeding our guests at our parties for years???

.
That comment has seriously offended me.
I had parties for my children, as a single mum , with all the food that you would expect, and entertainment paid for. One year it was a hall and bouncy castle, another year it was cinema and then home for tea, another one movies and pizza and pinata, always a homemade cake'

I wouldnt have dreamt of offering some sad do with no food like OP has mentioned.

then some seriously cheeky cheeky mare comes on and says that would be 'normal for single mums'.
sorry but just fek off.

When my kids had parties, I used to bribe serve the parents with a glass of something and make a pot of curry to encourage them to stay and help.

I've never been to a party where the kids didn't get fed by the hosts, in some occasions there's also been food and drinks available for the parents so definitely not a british thing.

I'm also amazed at a party in a park in the middle of November.

Normal for single mums, as they tend to be seriously short on cash, so have often taken food along to share and never said anything, but invites with a two parent family are usually a bit more generous so is a bit weird.

Not normal for single mums, at all, and being a single parent doesn't make it "normal" to be short on cash, perhaps be less patronising?

Brat,
Absolutely correct.
Who gives kids a glass of water.?
The OP is no doubt a -ucking muppett.

I am not saying OP is an ucking muppett I am saying Ldnmum is...:)

hmm well you do wonder, it sounds so unlikely doesnt it?
But trollhunting is not permitted...;)

😧,
Investigating is.

I know you weren't at my brother and sils house because you said there was food in the fridge. And you didn't mention it having a fair amount of booze instead.

Very strange. When the parents stayed, I fed kids and provided food and drinks for parents - cheese platter/grapes, pizza, cake, that sort of thing. The only time this didn't happen was when it was a per head child meal at a venue and you couldn't bring in food from outside. We still paid for the venue to provide tea, coffee and buscuits though. These are 2 hour parties btw.

And I meant to say, not a British thing. Totally unheard of in all the parties dd has attended. And there have been many. I could understand if it was a financial thing. But then why not say bring a dish?

ava seriously? Rough night? Have you read my updates? Do you realise this isn't the first time I'm posting...?

Not sure which part of my thread is sounding "strange" to you. Feel free to move on if you have any doubts about this being genuine.

I appreciate everybody else's comments though! Thanks.

I

*brat" Yes! I agree it is very unlikely and very strange. Still not a troll though. This accusation is making me really sad. Perhaps I'm too soft for AIBU.

brat

no its fine, I believe you. Just that after saying 'is it a British thing' you said that you had been to other parties here where this did not happen.
So it just sounded a bit....goady... that's all.
Maybe us Brits are a bit over sensitive....

I think I'd be busy for the 4th birthday of this girl next year.

brat, oh I see! I suppose I was just wondering whether not providing food was acceptable to British people under any circumstances. I suppose I know better though, I've always experienced great parties and hospitality in the UK, so why should kids' parties be any different.

pax It would be tempting, but I like them and will probably go anyway... The kids had fun! I will make sure to bring a thermos with some warm food though. And a few packets of biscuits.

YANBU, that is weird!

alors I think providing hot drinks and biscuits for parents and some snacks for the kids is totally fine, especially if it's just a couple of hours.

But given that we had quite along journey with two small kids (who are used to getting a warm lunch), it seemed really thoughtless not to feed at least them a proper meal.

And I hate saying this, but if you expect people to block the whole day, spend time and money on a journey and bring a present and then give nothing in return...that's just not how these things are supposed to work! Gift exchange is an ancient part of cultures around the world, isn't it? It's all about reciprocity.

Anyway, preaching to the converted...

Definitely weird and pretty rude, especially such a long time and with such small children!

And definitely not normal for a single mum. I have always catered for my kids parties and so have all the other single mums I know.

Nope, not British and not right! Food aplenty for both kids and adults is normal here. Aside from being the right thing to do, who on earth wants hungry/hangry guests for 5 hours??? Very very bizarre.