To find "busy" people irritating?

[Spacereindeer]

I understand that modern life is very busy, with many parents (and those without children!) having a huge amount to juggle, but a lot of people seem to get a buzz from telling people how booked up and busy they are. People are almost embarrassed to admit that they are available when trying to organise a night out.

Is it just me who thinks this or do some people really have a social engagement every night?

Most of the 'busy' people in my workplace aren't actually busy, just disorganised and ineffective.

Same, the "busy" ones aren't the ones doing the most work
The ones doing the most work don't have time to make sure they tell everyone how "busy" they are

YANBU. My yoga teacher is bizarrely always going on about how busy she is. She goes on about how pushed for time she is with all her kids and her classes and everything else...and how people always need her time...and then bloody stands there yapping after each class! I can't ever bloody get away from her!

If you've got time to talk about how busy you are...then you aren't.

No, hodd that was supposed to be an example of the kind of conversation where someone going on about how busy they were would be annoying, not saying that someone who's genuinely busy is automatically... Oh bugger it. Never mind. And where did I mention your DH or kids?

I used to have a ridiculous job in my twenties where I worked all the fucking time (corporate lawyer international deals). I frequently worked 3 nights in a row, normal to finish at 11pm and worked most weekends. So when I hear about "busy" yoga teachers sorry but I internally scoff

Depends if they are genuinely busy or just the type of person who takes on stuff to make themselves busy (does that make sense?).

One of my siblings has a job that means she has to work a couple of 12 hour days each week and we'd work round that (this counts as genuinely busy IMO) or a friend who can't resist volunteering for any upcoming event or booking appointments that in reality take half an hour plus travel time but rule themselves out for the entire day

Busy = unorganised.

Kerala me too! Last class she went ON and ON and all about how busy and stressed she is! Put me right off to be honest...all I could think was "Yes and I need to get back to the kids and then cook dinner and then work!"

I've booked in with a new one for this week!

I hate saying I'm busy. In fact I've taken to saying 'I'm too busy to...no, sorry, I'm not too busy - I've got 168 hours per week just like everyone else, but I've already allocated them to other stuff.' when talking about how I'd love to do x,y,z hobby/craft/allotment. Because it's true.

We all get the same number of hours. We just spend them differently.

YANBU. I have a friend who is always too busy to respond to messages etc and I can't be arsed with her any more. I have a full time job and a toddler DS and manage to find time to keep in touch with my friends and she's a SAHM with a daughter at school yet she can't. I honestly don't know what she does with her time that she can't spare 5 minutes to respond to a text or email.

Most of the 'busy' people in my workplace aren't actually busy, just disorganised and ineffective.

If I ask someone for a short report and they take two days because they've been too busy I send them on a time management course.

Sometimes they say they can't go because they're too busy.

Its almost always disorganisation. And the need to be 'important.'

I think it's true that people are embarrassed to admit they're free when arranging a night out. My school friends and I arrange a night out about two nights a year and I'm always the one who just cheerfully says ''i'm free for the rest of my life (except maybe one date) and then I watch as the other three open their diaries and try to work around each other. Blimey.

I've another friend, she doesn't work, she has a car, and I walk to work (full time) and she tells me how busy she is all the time, I can hardly believe she has the nerve to tell me she's too busy for me. I stopped replying.

If you don't find Lena Dunham annoying (I'm back and forth on the point), this is a funny 2 minute skit she performed which is at the same time a joke on the false self-deprecation women can also have about their business...

www.wnyc.org/story/lets-get-drinks/

*By the time you've done one works' dinner and two class mums' drinks and the school carol concert and the show you booked way in September

Stealth boast*

How on earth is that a stealth boast?????

I often say I'm busy. It's because I feel guilty about saying no to things. I'm quite introverted and need time alone. I also need a lot of sleep and worry that people will think I'm lazy. So I make out I'm busy, when actually I'm at home by myself having a nap.

Genuine question: would it be better just to say I can't do x or y because I'm chilling out/having a rest?

Very busy and important

We have a friend who always says she's busy. Once, my other friend asked her with what. She said she was watching TV with her mum. Ok then.

The most hardworking, successful man I ever knew had plenty of time for everyone. Perhaps not owning a TV had something to do with it.

No it doesn't bother me. It passes me off when OHs mum makes snide comments and implies we are lying though.

We have work, 2 young horses 3 young kids and 2 dogs. Of course we are busy.

I have a business, a family, a dog and a huge circle of friends all of whom also have jobs/courses/businesses and responsiblities. Because we actually like each other and want to spend time together, my weekends get very booked up and the ones that don't get booked up I ring fence for DH and ds.

I'm not some boasty beyatch, I'm just another woman trying to do my best and to spend time with the people I like.

Busy is all relative though.

I once had a day off work and spent it at the gym. One of the gym instructors teaches a few hours a week and has one DD aged 9, so not a toddler or babe in arms needing constant care.

After the yoga class I had, she was sitting in the gym cafe with a load of retired ladies having coffee. It was 11am. She was sitting there having a leisurely coffee watching the world go by. She had no other classes to teach that day, and her DD finished school at 3pm. So she had a good 4 hours to herself.

She was saying I am so busy and so stressed, I feel pulled in all directions.

I had to laugh inwardly and wandered what she would think of what I am usually doing at 11am on a Tuesday. having been up from 6am, on public transport from 7am, at work from 8:30am. By 11am I would be knee deep in work, phone going constantly, emails, paperwork, deadlines, clients et etc etc...and I wouldnt get to leave until 6pm and get home at 7:30pm.

Here she is at 11am on a Tuesday having taught one yoga class, and sitting having a quiet coffee and catch up and apparently she does that every time she teaches a class....and she is pulled in all directions and so horribly busy? LOL.

But from her perspective that is busy.

I'm very important and very, very busy doing important things. I'm busy lieing on the couch watching telly every night, very important that I get this done.

*wondered not wandered

I find the whole 'She doesn't even work how can she possibly be busier than me who has a job? Did I mention I go to work?' rather small minded.

It is possible for someone not to work and have a lot going on, everyone has to deal with different shit.

I do think 'I'm busy' is nicer than 'I would rather not spend time with you' which is probably the truth if you keep hearing it from the same people.

Retired people seem to be especially busy. i think when they retire they get very caught up in hobbies and holidays and just have not a moment to spare.