AIBU not to pay for decapitated teddy bear

[RestlessTraveller]

So I have a rescue dog who is lovely but has suffered appalling treatment in the past.
He loves meeting people but is very excitable so I am very careful when he is around people. Today I was sat outside a coffee shop and he was being extremely well behaving sitting beside my chair, a woman with a boy aged about 3 came
and sat at the table next to me. The little
boy asked if he could stroke the dog and I explained it was best not to as he might jump up at him. Cue an almighty tantrum, with him screaming "I want to stroke the puppy", his mother told him not to because the dog was obviously "vicious". I explained that he wasn't vicious just excitable. To which point the child yelled "nasty doggy" and kicked out at him missing my my dog, but very close by. I told him not to do it again and to go back and sit with his mother which he did but minutes later he threw his teddy bear at him at which point my dog looked at this soft toy on the ground, picked it up and promptly ripped it's head off. Whilst trying not to die of embarrassment I apologised but the mother completely flipped out, telling me that it was a dangerous dog and should be put to sleep. She then demanded that I pay for the toy. I told her that if he child hadn't thrown it the dog would never have got his paws on it and walked off. I don't think I was BU but my friend thinks I should have coffed up. What do you think?

You don't see any connection between bad parenting and behavioural problem in children?

Then you must be aware of huge differences in size and development?

Thanks for the slow hand clap, I'm flattered but it wasn't me that reported your comment.

I look forward to seeing this child on "Murderers and their Mothers" (a totally unsensational and unbiased television programme I am obsessed with) in 20 years time.

I'm ordering the popcorn now.

This is not sarcasm -I agree with Chardonnay tat bad behaviour which is not kindly but firmly corrected is going to get worse.

I think those who lack compassion and empathy for children demonstrate a worrying level of emotional and cognitive intelligence that is only potentially achieved by a child with an ineffective mother.

Yes I would be scared if a 3 year old kicked a dog

Firstly, this kid didn't kick the dog.

Secondly, if he did, being afraid for the dog's well-being is not the same of being afraid of a 3yo who you assume is a psychopath in the making.

And those bleeding hearts who find excuses for everything do perpetuate the worrying level of emotional and cognitive intelligence that is only potentially achieved by a child with an ineffective mother by ignoring the bad parenting by ineffective mothers.

Bloody hell , I thought it was inappropriate that the small child was called a little shit and a brat, now he is a potential psychopath with no hope of turning out ok. Ffs. He was three years old. Well, no he could have been 2, my ds is 2.9 and people have been guessing his age as 3.5 for months on end. Unless you actually asked his age op you were guessing.

You don't need to have a bleeding heart to think a child is not doomed to psychopathy because they kicked out at a dog when they were 3 yo and the mother failed to intervene.

For that you need an active imagination and a superiority complex.

You don't need to have a bleeding heart to think a child should not be called a little shit.

For that you need empathy, compassion and a sense of the vulnerability of children.

Put it this way, I'd rather be in the company of someone who once kicked out at a dog as a 3yo than someone who, as an adult, is capable of vilifying a 3yo, calling them a little shit, declaring them a protopsychopath and casting those who disagree as a bleeding heart.

worrying level of emotional and cognitive intelligence that is only potentially achieved by a child with an ineffective mother

Only mothers right? Fathers, grandparents, siblings and other people in a child's life are irrelevant, damn mothers, blame should always be firmly on their shoulders.

I'm not sure if that's for me?

In this instance, I can agree with Chardonnay that the boy's mother was ineffective. So I was trying to say that, even if this little boy's mum is ineffective, he is unlikely or only potentially likely to grow up to display the lack of empathy demonstrated by posters who would vilify this little boy.

I said in an earlier post, which feels like days ago now, that the mum is only one actor in his life and he will have lots of opportunities to learn kindness towards animals from others.

Your obviously a nice person to care for a rescue dog, I'm sure if you had been spoken to in a civil manner by the mother you would have insisted she take some money to replace the child's toy

When they started calling the kid a potential psychopath I thought all sense was lost but then in the darkness came a voice of reason. Kondossecretjunkroom, thank you for bringing a bit of light to this dark thread

kond thankyou i bring you cake.
No i wouldn't call a kid a shit, (however in my one post i stand by it, if a kid had killed my cat iwould not be feeling bad about calling it a shit,) however in the op's case i agree.

Where have I called the child in the OP "a little shit"?

As I said above, it has happened to my lovely dog and the child in question turned out a right little shit later.

This is my post, and I'm talking about a child who did turn into a little shit, after harassing my dog.

But don't let that stop you inventing things.

FrancisCrawford good post.

Restless - shit just got real! There's another thread running at the moment where they think you murdered the MN class bear!!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/_chat/2754283-WHO-HAS-THE-MN-CLASS-BEAR

Wtf is that pom thread about?

Fenella Oh fuck. Going to look at it now.

You are quite right Chardonnay, whilst your contempt for this 3yo child is palpable, unlike other posters with a similar view to you, you do not use the actual slur of 'little shit' in relation to this particular small child.

Therefore, go ahead and ignore the entire thrust of my post, you are clearly, a good egg.

Thanks Super I'd love to take that complement but there are plenty of posters who have pointed out this small boy is not beyond redemption, thank fuck.

Kali I might have had enough of cake after this 3 day bunfight, maybe something stronger?

That's OK Junk, even though I notice you've avoided saying sorry. But never mind.I do save my contempt for the mother who encouraged the child's behaviour.

Quite frankly, I place no value on being thought a good egg or not by anyone who's happy to excuse bad behaviour towards animals.