AIBU to think its just bizarre behaviour and rude to do this?

[Sparklyshoes16]

Today I went for meet up with a few friends and one of them didn't want to finish off their lunch so turned round to me in front of our group and said "I'm so full, here you finish this off", I declined and carried on with mine. We then ordered cake and coffee to finish off before going home, she had a very small bite of what she ordered and then again in front of everyone said "here you might as well finish this" again I declined and carried on eating what I had ordered. It was still sat there when we had all finished eating and she said "stop staring at it and have it if you want it" very loudly. I firmly said I don't want it and carried on talking/eating to everyone else I wasn't even looking at it. She has done this a few times in front of other people and I'm not sure why as I have never finished off someone else's meal (only my own family when I've been really hungry ). I'm quite large and she is VERY skinny so i don't know if it's just some sly dig...my other friend text me and asked if i was OK as she had noticed it became a little frosty...I don't want to reply as she is known to make a drama out of things...just feeling a little bit hurt...were all meant to be going out tomorrow night for another friend's joint birthday meal but don't feel like going as don't want any comments whilst eating.

[2kids2dogsnosense]

Thank you, Bear.

It was driving me crackers not knowing.

[AdmiralData]

I thought I read the full thread but maybe I missed bits.

Tell her to ask for a doggy bag.

[Memoires]

Go tomorrow, but try to make sure you sit between two other people, then if she wants to offer food specifically to you she will have to make a bit of a production of it, and you can look at her like this and suggest sweetly - but v publically - that she offer it to someone else. If she does it again, you can ask her, publically again, why she wants you particularly to eat her food?

[spanky2]

It's where a ring leader in a group of women wants you out of the group. It's snide digs and rumours behind your back. They then invite everyone but you to go out then act surprised when you ask if they went out without you. It's from a Jacqueline Wilson book.

[acasualobserver]

Fuck it, go for the nuclear option - when her food arrives say you're not in the mood to wait for her tired leftovers, spear something on her plate and stuff it straight into your mouth.

[ItShouldOfBeenJess]

spanky. Glad I know what 'Wendying' is but stunned adult women pull this crap. Seriously? If I were OP, I'd simply blank her. Things will crumble soon enough, and then the original friends will have to eat a little humble pie (or offer it to someone else)

[RortyCrankle]

That would infuriate me and I would probably look at her as if she was completely mad and say in a shocked voice 'what a bizzare suggestion, why on earth do you think I want to eat your leftovers?' then carry on with my conversation.

I used to go out to dinner with office friends and one of them commented on what I ordered every single time like 'omg you can't possibly eat all that'. She would order the cheapest meal and then try to steal chips from my plate. She nearly lost a finger the last time when I hit her hand with my knife in automatic reflex as I loathe anyone putting their fingers in my food. So I took her aside and had stern words - she never did it again. It may be you need to have words with this 'friend'.

[cantmakeme]

So glad that I don't socialise in groups. All this bitching and awful "tinkly little laughs". Just... urgh.

[Sparklyshoes16]

I've took the plunge and texted her as don't want any funny/bitchy stuff for tomorrow:

Me: Hi how's you?
Her: Good thanks it was nice seeing you today...you looking forward to tomorrow night? You buying anything new? Could go last minute shopping if you want?...(I'm not sure why she's asking me this I feel like I need to go out and get new clothes)
Me: Erm no can't really afford it...I'll just throw on something from the wardrobe... can I ask you something...Is there any reason why you keep asking me if I want your food?
Her: LOL just thought instead of it going to waste and I know you like your food especially your sweet stuff thought of you...sorry wont offer again!!!!!
Me: Don't be sorry just felt a little uncomfortable earlier as I don't want leftovers if you know what i mean? Well see you tomorrow night should be fun just wrapping presents now.
Her: No not really...you like your food and thought it would be better than it going to waste i.e. win win...'other friend' said you looked a bit peed off earlier was that because of this? Please don't be so sensitive its just abit of cake!!!!
Me: I'm not being sensitive i'm just not wanting more food...not sure where you get this idea from but please don't offer food i'll order more if needs be...please don't read anything into this just being honest...see you tomorrow.

Other friend: Everything ok love? You and 'other friend' ok? seems abit tense...I dont think she means anything by offering food you know what she's like she never finishes a meal whilst you always do!! don't take it to heart hun you can be quite sensitive just sayin!

I feel like crying as obviously their talking/textin about me...my husband can't quite believe what's going on he's now saying he's not bothered about going tomorrow as he'll speak his mind aarrghhh don't know what to say now...I've stopped texting as I feel its getting quite bitchy...just feel really sad as I don't have any other friends here so feeling a little ganged up on. Don't want to tell the others as its the party meal tomorrow and don't want this to overshadow it

[IthoughtATMwasacashpoint]

WTAF is a tinkly little laugh? Does anyone have a soundtrack of one?

[softboiledeggs]

Oh OP you sound like a really nice person but those two sound like a pair of cunts. Your husband also sounds lovely, they are just jealous. It's so horrible what they are doing, they know really that they are being horrible and are trying to make out you are being paranoid to cover it. You're not paranoid or over sensitive, they are fuckers... god I'm so mad for you! Cut them off and live a happy life with your husband and real friends

[Realhousewivesofshit]

See for me the friendship with them all would end at hun

Is that really word for word what you said/she said/friend said? If yes wow just wow.

Move on op. Really move on.

[Sparklyshoes16]

DixieWishbone I think I might start doing this...and need to start seeing friends more that don't live here.

[MissElizaBennettsBaubles]

What a bloody awful woman!

Put your most gorgeous outfit on, do your hair and make up, and get out there and sparkle tomorrow.

Let your DH pay you lots of loving attention, and Don't let the bastards get you down. Order exactly what you want from the menu, have a good time with your loved one, and to hell with the bullies.

Fuck em.

[ItShouldOfBeenJess]

hun would be the deal breaker...
Your husband is right. Fuck them off. Do something nice with him instead.

cashpoint. My laugh sounds like Muttley from Wacky Races so couldn't possibly help you out on 'tinkly'!

[Baylisiana]

I would text them both with LOL (since they like that) I don't think I am being insensitive. I just don't have any problems with food or insecurity about my appearance, so I am not used to that kind of behavior and it just comes across as weird. I know you have your struggles so hope I haven't hit a nerve.

I would then avoid them, they sound a drain.

[Sparklyshoes16]

Yes word for word Realhousewivesofshit I hate conflict took ages to write a reply that couldn't be construed as anything else was abit shocked to see text in midst of everything from other friend...Really glad I've got this forum...thank you all for making me laugh and giving me back my sanity as really thought I was being over sensitive and to know I wasn't imagining that this is just not normal behavior . I know some of you have said its jealousy but I honestly cant see what there is jealous to be of? Me and my husband are really normal and boring honestly...we hate limelight arguments so tend to squabble and then laugh about it or squabble in private never blow up 'in the middle of the street or friend get togethers'...my husband knows I loathe my body and at some point when I'm ready I will do something about it I just don't like to let them know it as when I have it was twisted...anyway I am liking these comebacks I've never been good at them so storing them up

[Sparklyshoes16]

DixieWishbone I think I might start doing this...and need to start seeing friends more that don't live here.

I meant as in this wendying thing!

[Bluechip]

OP, you sound lovely - I would like to be your friend! Your DH sounds pretty damn great too.

Well done for asking her about it. Try and forget about it for the birthday do and enjoy talking to your other friends. It sounds as if food obsessed woman and gossip woman thrive on talking about others so I'd try and minimise contact. Perhaps you could arrange some meet ups with 1 or 2 others in your group without them.

[Bluechip]

And agree with pp - her meanness is because you are generally secure and happy whereas she is insecure and unhappy. It's envy.