Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To feel a bit sad about this gift

188 replies

Sendcoffeeandchocs · 30/09/2016 14:31

OH has had flowers delivered for my birthday. I am very grateful for the gift and I know that I am lucky to have him.

However, I can't help feeling a little sad at the same time. The bouquet is pale pink and pale purple with a few white bits. These are colours that I just don't like. I do not wear anything in these colours, I do not buy anything for the house in these colours, and I avoid dressing our baby girl in these colours.
I have said to my OH so many times when I've bought flowers how much I love really brightly coloured ones.
He definitely knew what he was buying as the website they are from you choose by picture.

AIBU to feel a bit sad that after 9 years living together, he still doesn't know my taste at all?

OP posts:
hutchblue · 30/09/2016 17:53

This reply has been withdrawn

The OP has privacy concerns and so we've agreed to take this down.

rainbowstardrops · 30/09/2016 22:12

Bit shit to only buy you flowers. Especially as you don't even really like them.
I'd be a bit Confused too

Amethyst81 · 01/10/2016 03:54

Agree with TatertotsMy DH would not have a clue which colour flowers I like, I've not really given it much thought either tbh. With all respect OP if this is all you have to complain about then you must have a very easy life YABU.

BastardGoDarkly · 01/10/2016 03:59

generic and unsuitable they're fucking flowers!? Grin

BastardGoDarkly · 01/10/2016 04:03

Grin Grin print him out a colour wheel?! Grin

Mycraneisfixed · 01/10/2016 04:36

ExH once bought me a hideous pair of granny slippers for Christmas when I'd only just become a mum and def not a granny! I wore them as they were actually very practical and warm

NightWanderer · 01/10/2016 04:43

It's a bit crap that your only birthday present is something you don't actually like. I'm always amazed at these threads that basically say that you should be grateful for any shit he deigns to give you because he's a man and your expectations shouldn't be any higher. It's depressing actually.

If your husband is a mad football fan but you got him a rugby almanac for his birthday because he's a man and he should like all sports and you're just a woman how are you supposed to understand the difference between football and rugby, I bet he wouldn't be impressed.

Anyway, I suggest setting up an Amazon gift list before Christmas Wink

MrsOs · 01/10/2016 05:13

Ignore the haters on here.. remember he is a man... Buy yourself some flowers in a while And pick the type you like maybe then he will remember for future! Happy birthday btw x

Mummernot · 01/10/2016 05:18

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

SoMuchRoomForActivities · 01/10/2016 05:19

You sound like a PITA.

MrsJuerdoNorksko · 01/10/2016 05:22

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Mummernot · 01/10/2016 05:25

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

ScaredAboutTheFuture · 01/10/2016 05:31

I don't think you are being unreasonable.

I actually don't like flowers and find them a pointless lazy gift. DH would send them too me for mothers day, birthday etc even though he knew I don't like them.

He got angry one time when I didn't act suitably pleased and said I was ungrateful etc until I asked him if he'd like bloody flowers for every occasion. He if course said no and I asked why he thought I should then. The most I get now is a £1 bunch of daffodils which is perfect as the children buy it with their own money.

DailyMailPenisPieces · 01/10/2016 05:32

I think op is trying to say it would be a bit like her buying her DP the wrong beer - he would appreciate it but would have preferred a beer he likes. I often have to check what beer to buy because I only hear 'bla bla bla beer'.

I do think TaterTots has it though with the 'bla bla bla flowers' Grin

Ilovenannyplum · 01/10/2016 05:45

YABU
Sorry.

They are flowers, they aren't permanent and they'll be gone in a few days.

Puremince · 01/10/2016 07:37

After years and years of telling DH what my favourite flowers are, I finally got the perfect bouquet on our 22nd anniversary. Not from DH, from DS, who is a bit more switched on than DH!

topcat2014 · 01/10/2016 07:54

I buy flowers for DW when I feel like it from Aldi, and the decision takes me 20 seconds max. At no point do I try to co-ordinate flowers with her clothes choices, or the cushions etc etc.

No good deed ever goes unpunished..

PageStillNotFound404 · 01/10/2016 07:58

YANBU OP, and I agree with MargaretCavendish and NightWanderer (great analogy btw) about the stereotyping and low bars set for men here.

JenniferYellowHat1980 · 01/10/2016 08:02

OP, do you always buy gifts for your DH that are spot on - he loves them and uses them til they fall to pieces? Because I rarely manage that. Personal taste is utterly subjective and what someone thinks I might like I don't necessarily. Same goes with DH's choices - so usually I ask for something specific.

katemess12 · 01/10/2016 08:05

If my husband only bought me flowers based on the colours I wear, I'd be getting black and white flowers. You don't buy someone flowers on the basis of the colours they wear.

Yes, I do think YABU.

It's truly the thought that counts. The gift doesn't matter.

Marmalade85 · 01/10/2016 08:05

OP you are NOT BU. What is the point in buying flowers if they aren't to the person's taste. Lazy and rude.

katemess12 · 01/10/2016 08:07

However, Happy Birthday, OP. If your birthday is Sept 30, we share a birthday. Smile

Bellasima20 · 01/10/2016 08:08

I personally can't stand supermarket ready made bouquets in comparison to a bouquet by a florist, I've gently hinted this but DH fidgets event time and an M&S bunch it is. I still love them and the gesture. Flowers are far more of a girl thing, to him he probably did get bright flowers, don't be so picky- such a great issue to have in the scheme of things happening in the world.

Lookinatu · 01/10/2016 08:09

I wouldn't take it personally op my dh knows I love orange roses but sometimes I get pink flowers of some sort. Just take it that he still knows you like flowers and maybe before next year innocently point out some flowers you like.

WhateverWillBe · 01/10/2016 08:12

OP YANBU to feel a bit down but I would keep it in perspective. You've mentioned many times that you like brightly coloured flowers, and it's obviously stuck in your mind...but for your oh, these may have been passing comments that just didn't sink in for whatever reason, which is no real reflection on how he feels about you.

Dh and I have been together for 12 years, living together for 11. Last Christmas, he made a surprise starter for Xmas lunch (he always cooks). He placed it in front of me with a flourish and said 'your favourite!', obviously proud of himself. It was fishcakes. I fucking hate fishcakes and have mentioned this to him a few times in the past when they've been an option on the menu somewhere.

He was gobsmacked and could have sworn they were my favourite Hmm