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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

What is the rudest thing a fellow parent has said to you?

360 replies

weresquirrel · 28/09/2016 21:41

Another parent whose child is in my child's class made a comment about my younger child being ugly Confused. It didn't register at first (I think I was in shock) and I only really took in her comment an hour or so after she had said it.

What is the rudest thing a fellow parent has said to you?

OP posts:
TotallyOblivious · 28/09/2016 22:17

Cathaka15 Shockthats a disgusting thing for your FIL to have said to you!! What has your DH said about it?

DeadGood she's a snob who has a wealthy husband and can afford to be a SAHM... I think she was sticking her nose up at the fact that I am forced to rely on childcare than me actually working Hmm

Mylittlelights · 28/09/2016 22:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pourmeanotherglass · 28/09/2016 22:19

No-one has been rude about my girls, though I did have a mum un- invite me from a pub night when dd was in reception. One mum had just told me that some of them were going out, and did I want to go, then her friend came over and told her she didn't want to invite the whole class, just their little group. The same mum ignored me all the way through primary, while discussing nights out etc with other mums in front of me. No idea what her problem was.

bananafish · 28/09/2016 22:20

My SIL telling me that she was so "vachement choqué" (totally taken aback) by how rude my children are...
...My 4 yr old forgot to say 'merci' to her a few times Hmm

Frankly, I was equally "vachement choqué"at her 19 yr old daughter spliffing up at 10 am in the morning, but I managed to hold my tongue. Because I have manners.

nancyblackett80 · 28/09/2016 22:22

On a hen do at 6 months pregnant , ended up sat next to dull as fuck "Ricks Wife" - literally I cannot even remember her name, other than she was married to "My Rick" - anyway briefly discuss maternity leave etc as I was a contractor at the time and the difficulties etc. She asks how long I'll take off with baby, me in a ironic, not even thought about it yet way says oh about three weeks at this rate. Ricks wife replies horrified "but can't your husband afford to support you for longer?"

I was (internally) like yes actually but I'd rather not discuss my finances with someone I've only just met.

Thankfully we just scraped through but how would someone have felt who was struggling or single or the only wage earner.

She also bragged about the wonderful Ricks new Jaguar. Turned out by the time we got to the actual wedding that it was on the never never and had to be returned as she got pregnant with twins. Ha. Felt like asking (ironically) if her husband couldn't afford to buy her a car but figured it would be wasted on her.

teablanket · 28/09/2016 22:22

Someone told me they liked seeing my developmentally disabled child because it made their own child's shortcomings seem less disappointing. Glad to provide such a service, you miserable trout. Angry

Boiing · 28/09/2016 22:24

"Oh, THAT'S what stay at home mums do all day, is it?" Said dismissively as I started playing a game with my toddler (to distract him from the fact that my supposed friend's child kept attacking him). Apparently I was supposed to loll on the sofa sipping coffee and ignore the fact that her child was continually attacking mine because "they have to sort it out themselves." Not seen her since!

DramaAlpaca · 28/09/2016 22:24

I'd just had my third son and was proudly showing him off when I picked his older brothers up from nursery.

A mother I knew slightly came over & said to me, 'never mind, you can try for a girl next time.'

No congratulations, no admiring the baby, just that. Rude cow.

charliedontsurf · 28/09/2016 22:24

Today I went to a playgroup with DD 18m. I sat down at a table full of huns to eat a slice of chocolate cake, DD got a small piece of the sponge. They'd all been ignoring us until suddenly one swung round in her chair and said 'Eurgh, that is my worst nightmare!', I kind of smiled at her like I'm not sure what you're on about, and she said 'have a wipe!' and flung a babywipe at DD (landing on top of my cake!)

No idea why a child eating caused such revulsion (DD hadn't even put the cake in her mouth yet) but I took great pleasure in watching her screw her nose up as DD jabbed her fingers into the buttercream and smeared it about Grin

I don't think I've had any really rude comments yet but she's still young so there's plenty of time.

Champagneformyrealfriends · 28/09/2016 22:25

loulou I had the same said to me Grin wonder if we run in similar circles?!

bananafish · 28/09/2016 22:26

Good grief teablanket - that's shocking!

crazymissdaisy · 28/09/2016 22:27

Probably didn't mean to be rude but: "What's wrong with him?" - my precious first born baby with red cracked cheeks from eczema.

needsahalo · 28/09/2016 22:27

Was a single parent when my youngest started nursery. Woman in playground asked what I was going to do next. Explained I was starting teacher training. She thought very carefully before saying. ...I wold love to do that but I can't because I have a husband.

Cathaka15 · 28/09/2016 22:29

Totally- Dh has had a massive row with both his dp and hasn't spoken to them since. He was so shocked and can't believe why a grandparent would say something like that about their own grandchildren.

vvmama92 · 28/09/2016 22:29

andadietcoke - Someone said the same to me when I was pregnant! I was happily chatting to another expectant mother (of two already) in the waiting room and when conversation came around to my age and the fact I was having twins she scoffed "Christ, you must have done something astoundingly terrible in a previous life to have deserved twins at 20" AND THEN SHUDDERED as if it was the worst thing in the world. I'll never forget it.

THEN there are all the snide comments from mums at the school gates, but who wants to get into that Hmm

YappyYapster · 28/09/2016 22:31

'Get that little shit off that scooter' said by my sister at a family party where ride on toys were there for the kids. My eldest was 10 and the oldest child there, merrily joining in with the fun. She has much younger children and had decided my son was too old to participate.

PomBearWithAnOFRS · 28/09/2016 22:35

I was in town with my PFB aged about 6 months and a couple of girls who were VILE to me in school walked past. One said, loudly, "that must have been rape" and they sniggered. (I was 20 so it wasn't that long after we left school)

peaceloveandbiscuits · 28/09/2016 22:36

Some stupid woman asked me the other day, so what do you do all day? How do you fill your time? I suppose you're a lady of leisure? No. I look after my toddler and I have a long term illness. Fuck off.

ollieplimsoles · 28/09/2016 22:36

'oh shes bottom heavy, like her mum'

Said by mil when dh mentioned dd had moved onto size 4+ pampers.

Ar least she doesn't look like a cream egg on a couple of match sticks love.

SpookyPotato · 28/09/2016 22:36

These are AWFUL! I can't believe the rudeness of some people, I just can't imagine saying anything like that.. I've been unscathed so far but hope someone comes up with some good responses incase it does happen!

katemess12 · 28/09/2016 22:38

Nothing to my face, fortunately.

Although I'm sure my grandmother has made comments to other people, because she's that sort of person. She said about one of her baby granddaughters, "She's quite cute, although she has a very small mouth, doesn't she?"

Just those sorts of comments. No one is safe from them, haha.

MammaTJ · 28/09/2016 22:38

I must have a resting bitch face that I don't know about, or my reputation for honest talking precedes me! I have never had this shit!!

I hope never to have this shit, as me committing murder might negatively affect my children and GrandChild!

Mollymoo78 · 28/09/2016 22:40

My mil called my daughter (her granddaughter!) a loner because she was a little shy around other children. My dd was two.

Tortoisecharlie · 28/09/2016 22:43

I had the PTA head and most popular parent - tell me loudly in the playground in front of all the other parents, that my 4 year old...
"Is having trouble controlling himself isn't he. He's obviously having trouble at home. It is hard for him."

What?! That was several years ago and I am still cross. I was a single parent, managing to cope very well thank you very much! I later found out by asking my 4 year old, that said PTA head had tried to teach his class art that day, as a 'favour' as she was an artist - and my son was bored and she took offence.

Also, on more than one occasion, once from a good friend that my other autistic son "Was very mild isn't he... Is he really autistic? That diagnosis you got as severe must have been wrong... I'm sure he'll be fine I mean he even said 'Bye".

What am I supposed to say to that?! Like the above woo poster - do I really need to punch home how utterly exhausting and hard it is for my son and us behind the scenes?!

It's meant 'well' in a weird sense but it really is like denying someone has cancer because it's not visible in the 5 minutes you see them!

Zaphodsotherhead · 28/09/2016 22:45

ExMIL at a family party - where all the other children knew each other but mine knew none of them (because we lived a long way away). Re DD1, who wasn't playing with the other kids..."Oh, i think she must be autistic."

No, just shy, but thanks for your opinion....

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