To be so upset that my partner burst dd's balloon as a punishment?

[TemporarilyLost]

I'm fully braced to be told I'm being precious and PFB but it's left me feeling so sorry for her . Last night there were tears and tantrums before bed. Dd, 2yrs almost 3 got angry over a wooden jigsaw and threw a piece against the wall. Dp flipped and told her off. This made her even more het up and so he took her brand new paw patrol balloon from the fair and popped it in front of her. She seemed more cross than sad at the time but this morning the first thing she did when we got up was look in the kitchen bin and say 'balloons in bin, I'm a naughty girl'. It's made me inexplicably sad for her and I'm not sure the punishment really fitted the crime but I want to know before I raise it with Dp whether I'm just being over sensitive.

OP, I'm ashamed to say I did a very similar thing when DS was a similar age. Spur of the moment, end of my tether.
DH went ape with me. Ape.
It made me really examine my anger issues and deal with them.
My mum used to do this type of thing too, and that's no excuse but an explanation. I have been doing everything in my power to break that horrible circle ever since.

Dreadful. Make sure DD knows she wasn't naughty. Silly, maybe. Poor her and poor you. My DS is 3 and recently fell off the settee and burst a balloon his friend had given him. He was distraught. Balloons mean a lot to little ones and we shouldn't underestimate that.

It is normal for a two/three year old to have limited emotional control. It is not normal for a grown man to have the same. I have an almost two year old and it upsets me to think of anyone doing anything of the sort to her and the poor hurt confused little face. I don't know your full back story, just what I've seen on this thread, and I know this is easier said than done, but please please leave. You and your DD deserve so much more and better. There is nothing normal or good or kind about that behaviour and it will only get worse.

I've started drinking again. I'm going to go sober for October and I'll use that as my reason. I'm utterly lost and feel like I've been deceiving people on other threads that called me strong.

I just want it all to stop. Really I do. He shouldn't be mean to either of us. I want him out of our lives.

I've read the full thread now and can only reiterate what the others have said and I really hope you get out soon. Please don't believe you're rubbish at doing anything discipline or otherwise because you're not.

I don't feel there has been any deception. You are in all likelihood still in shock. Can you go and see your family again? Take the bag under the bed, head to your parents, tell them everything and don't ever go back. Ever.

OP I'm with you on the Sober October thing. I started drinking again when ex left; have a very fragile grip on sobriety right now but am always looking for others to go through it with me. It's a coping mechanism, so don't be too hard on yourself, but the clarity that comes with sobriety is mind-blowing.