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Original poster

What do I reply to this/is there an innocent explanation?

243 replies

Fanfeck · 25/09/2016 14:46

I want to keep this brief
I was texting a friend I've known for 4ish years through DD, a friend I have been there for through the breakdown of her marriage/health problems etc and visa versa. I only say this to explain it's definitely a friendship of sorts as opposed to just meeting for the kids.

In one of my messages I said "that's great, looking forward to it. Could really do with a chat"

I then got a screenshot back of my message with the caption "bet it isn't going to be half as interesting as it sounds"

Neither of us have replied and she's gone offline. I'm so embarrassed and I so want her to explain it away.

OP posts:
AbyssinianBanana · 26/09/2016 09:49

Send her this link and caption it... I love my new text tone!

m.youtube.com/watch?v=sfFdx4IihlE

Stormtreader · 26/09/2016 09:50

I would be very uneasy doing any kind of weight loss/keep fit activity with a proven two-faced gossip, way too high a risk of her friends getting some "amusing" "oh my god, you should have seen her arse wobbling!" gossip.

CoolToned · 26/09/2016 09:51

Forget her.

Mozfan1 · 26/09/2016 09:53

storm honestly I think this is why I only have a couple of friends- shit like this is so hurtful and kills self esteem. Hope op is ok

hackmum · 26/09/2016 09:54

Don't say anything vindictive - you'll lose the moral high ground.

I think best just to ignore from now on. If she wants to apologise, she can.

ParanoidGynodroid · 26/09/2016 09:55

Oh Abyssinian I'd love to have that as my ringtone! Not brave enough, though.

Tiredtomybones · 26/09/2016 10:00

I'd reply and ask who the screen shot was meant for and see what she says. Alternatively OutsSelf had a brilliant reply.

EenyMeenyMo · 26/09/2016 10:06

i just read it as a joke- you were saying you really need to talk to her - she could have replied something like "ooh that sounds intriguing" - and she has just pre-empted that conversation - your text could have been read as if you had something really important to tell her ..
not sure she has done much to be called a bitch though

GDarling · 26/09/2016 10:17

I'm wondering if the message was really for you???
My friend had a really bitchy message that was not for her!!!

gratesnakes · 26/09/2016 10:18

I think you have handled it really well OP. I think the invitation to get fit together was a clumsy apology. I would ignore her now. If she wants to come round to apologise properly she will. It's all a bit sad and I bet she is devastated about losing a good friend over a bit of silly gossip. She has learnt a hard lesson. Good friends and companions are not easy to find.

Thejubremonyatthelibrary · 26/09/2016 10:22

I'm another one for Coconutty's response. Take the high-ground and send that response word for word.

Catsick36 · 26/09/2016 10:28

Ask her what she meant. Then she knows she is being pulled up on it. You can tell her how hurtful it was and you haven't got time for that kind of friend.

gratesnakes · 26/09/2016 10:47

Like eatsleephockey I am a softy and if she does want to apologise I would at least listen. We all make mistakes.

Arfarfanarf · 26/09/2016 10:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MammaTJ · 26/09/2016 10:56

I end up shouting at the computer screen on so many of these threads because the OP is a complete walkover and not listening to the advice given.

Not on this one. You rock!! Such a dignified and succinct response, in sending her back the money for the tickets. She is clearly thick skinned, or just thick, sending you a message about 'Let's so this', so you may have to be a bit more obvious, like telling her you do not need or have time for someone two faced in your life.

For future reference, and a lesson hard learned by me, if someone slags everyone off to you, the chances are, they also slag you off to everyone else!

differentnameforthis · 26/09/2016 11:09

"that's great, looking forward to it. Could really do with a chat"

What are you looking forward to?

While it doesn't sound good, I think rushing to think there isn't a completely innocent explanation is over reacting. If the friendship means anything to you, doesn't she deserve a chance to offer an explanation?

JellyBelli · 26/09/2016 11:14

Fanfeck You're a star and exactly the kind of person I'd like to have as a friend in RL Star
I love the dignified way you handled this.

MissMoo22 · 26/09/2016 11:22

Ouch. I can't believe people think there is an innocent explanation to this. There isn't. She was bitching to someone else about OP and sent the screenshot to the wrong person.

OP, by sending the 'let's do this' meme she's hoping you don't have the balls to confront her on it and wants you to pretend you didn't see it/didn't think anything bad of it and carry on as normal. I would have to confront her but also think ignoring her is just as suitable.

minipie · 26/09/2016 11:38

hmm there wasn't a funny typo in your original message was there? eg "could really do with a shag" instead of "could really do with a chat"

That's the only situation where I can see that her screenshot and caption would make sense as a reply back to you.

Does it make sense as a bitchy forward to someone else though? Is your name on the message - would any third person know who was saying "could really do with a chat"? if not then it doesn't really make sense that it was a bitchy message to someone else...

gingina · 26/09/2016 11:38

Why not just be honest with her now.
Send her a message saying that because of her previous message you have decided that you don't want to continue a friendship with her"
Then delete or block or whatever and move on.
Life is too short to waste on negative arseholes like this.

sonjadog · 26/09/2016 11:54

I think I would gt rid of this one too. When my friend did it to me, she fell over herself apologizing and came to find me as soon as we were at work the next day to talk about it. Pretending it didn`t happen is not okay.

MermaidTears · 26/09/2016 11:58

Wow what a treat she is.
There is no other explanation.
She is taking the right piss out of you to someone else!!!
Glad you are not gonn continue this friendship. You obviously are a tiresome bore to her! What a bitch

MermaidTears · 26/09/2016 12:02

Forgot to add whoever she meant to send this to she has obviously already been slagging you off to them for a while, it's not the first time.
It's an inside joke.
Otherwise the message wouldn't make sense to send to a friend you'd not discussed previously.
Ditch the bitch
I hate nasty shit like thism

scootinFun · 26/09/2016 12:14

I would screenshot her screenshot and send it back to her - no explanation necessary

hungryhippo90 · 26/09/2016 12:17

Oh gosh. I'd send a breezy message saying that you can't wait to meet up! Pretend you never saw the message, and when you see her, tilt your head to the side and say, I'm really worried about you, are you OK? You've been ever so erratic lately, and that you feel you've seen a different side to her recently. ..be as nice as pie to her. She will feel awkward and shitty

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