To have sent all the children home from the sleepover, before they had even gone to sleep...

[Waterstick]

My son is shy, but seems to have made friends, so I thought he wanted a sleepover (he's 9) and most people are having them now.

When they arrived, they didn't really interact with DS, just between each other and every time they laughed, DS seemed to just come out to me.

I was upstairs doing general tidying, but hear DS start to cry, he was some how trapped in the toilet, the kids seemed to be engaged with the telly and wouldn't speak when I asked about it. DS cannot lock the door, but yet it's not hard to lock from the outside with a coin. DS swore to me that he never touched the lock so wasn't sure why he was stuck in there.

Honestly, the whole time it felt like they didn't want DS there and it was his party! The bit that then topped it over the edge was when my son was trying to put a DVD into the telly and one of them shoved him out the way and quickly changed the DVD. I saw that and told them that it wasn't okay and they were all going home.

It just wasn't on, I'm quite horrified.

Rant over.

I probably was being U though.

I think though if you'd got a phone call like that you wouldn't just take what the parent said and say nothing.
You'd question your child. And probably ask the other parents if they knew what had happened.

And by the sound of it, the children may have genuinely said that didn't know what happened.

Being locked into a toilet-I suspect he might have locked it himself because he didn't want his friends coming in. Our lock on the bathroom is stiff, so we have a rule that if the door's shut there's someone in so it's not accessible. If we have visitors all except ds will lock it. Not something I've ever said to the dc but they do it without thinking.
And someone getting locked into the toilet is quite funny. The caretaker managed to do it at work once. We still remind him of it. He finds it funny and brings it up himself. As an adult we can see how it could be upsetting, but 9yos are not known for their thinking in such ways.
I've certainly been in situations where I am deliberately not laughing because although funny, it's upsetting for the other person. I wouldn't expect 9yos to have that control.

They may have also asked the teacher if there have been problems at school. if the teacher says no, the children's stories equate in what they've told their parents then as a parent you probably come to the conclusion that either the OP overreacted, or it was a one off incident. And if that's the case you probably do feel awkward around the parent and won't choose to talk.

I had one of my dc accused of bullying when they definitely weren't. Turned out the child who accused her picked on one child a term to accuse-she did this throughout primary. It did mean I was telling her to keep away at one point because if she tried to play nicely it was being twisted when told. (Teachers observed very closely)