to allow my DD to go to the Notting Hill Carnival?

[haventkilledtheorchidyet]

DD (14) wants to go to the NHC. She is quite streetwise and will be going with a couple of friends. AIBU to let her?

"Jealous" .

You sound jealous. (and bitter)

and you sound about 12.

I literally can't imagine anything more grim than some random rubbing them self up against me.

jealous

Brilliant comeback. Really top notch argument.

Yes I'm absolutely seething with jealousy, that no random strangers rubbed their sweaty cocks into my backside this bank holiday weekend.

I really should have taken the 50 minute journey from my home in East London, to the NHC.

The cock rubbing could have commenced immediately on the packed underground.

Ahhhh, Worra we could have met up and went around "dropping it like it's hot in mens' groins".

Ah Chipped and Worra can I join you too? we can get more guys rubbing their cocks in our arse cracks if there are more of us?

There's still time Chipped

The British Legion at Stratford has a bingo night this Saturday.

We could fit a spot of twerking in just before the meat raffle?

Good thinking Queen

Like a sort of cock & flaps conga?

I fear that the British Legion are far too decent to sexually assault us and then make out we are hysterical and we don't understand the culture.

The meat raffle I could be interested in, Queen you are always welcome, but here in East London we do things differently. You'll probably just get mugged, rather than stabbed.

LOL@ jealous

Is that what sets aside the various areas of London?

North: bum crack penis rubbing
East: meat raffle
South: (where I am): panty tombola
West: any suggestions?

We can do a tour of each bit of London and enjoy the fruits of their specialty

Queen
You'll have to shout a bit all us West Londoners are partially deaf due to the noise of the planes going over

Mlungu I don't have to put up with it because I don't live in the UK. I visit several times a year on business sometimes bringing my kids. We went to the carnival for the first time last year. It was utterly squalid, nothing to be proud of and seriously lets the city down. During a recent trip I saw publicity for this year's event endorsed by the new mayor billing it as a family event. I wonder when he last went along to see what really goes on. Hopefully the city will see sense and either end the event or manage it properly for the safety of all concerned.

Mlungu forever mesmerised by Mnyama- no come back. F.A.C.T

As Queen said earlier;

"Brilliant comeback. Really top notch argument."

Well Mlungu, take a trip to London Zoo the next time you're in the area?

Just to add a different perspective, going to carnival as a "spectator" is very different to going and playing mas as part of a band. my mum used to take me when I was little then I stopped going for a few years until I was 18 at which point I went with a band. Definitely makes a difference as you feel a lot more secure. I went this year for the first time in 12 years and my experience wasn't the same as some of those outlined here, I had an amazing time. Yes there were horrifically drunk people but I didn't see any behaviour that I've not seen on your average Friday night out on Clapham High Street tbh. The intention behind NHC is no different to the intention behind Glastonbury etc but the fact that it's free to attend and in a residential area rather than a park or field means that it attracts a huge demographic rather than a niche and sometimes that means stupid people that don't have the best of intentions. The thing with that is, that can and does happen anywhere all the time, it just gets highlighted because of the event itself. Personally, I think the police have done a decent job keeping it in check over the years and I felt safe there this year because of the police presence.

I think the argument about understanding what is cultural makes a difference to how you view what you see regarding dancing etc.
I've been fortunate enough to go to carnival and a lot of events leading up to carnival in another Caribbean island and whining is just how dancing is done all over the carribbean and has been for years. In some of the examples here, there was a clear crossing of lines/boundaries/etc from dancing into sexual assault but I guess if you're not used to it from a cultural perspective then a basic whine might freak you out.

I can't see a basic whine freaking anyone out as long as it's consensual.

If it isn't, then it's an assault from any perspective.

Just because it's at carnival, doesn't change that.

Worra agreed, if you ignore the fact people are attending a Caribbean carnival!

It's really not that hard to understand, no matter how hard you try to ignore basic facts to frame your argument.

A few posters have made this very simple point, but you have simply chosen to ignore them to fit your cultural point of view, and to place your view as some how superior to the approximately 1.5 million visitors that return to the carnival year in year out!

It's not smart to frame an argument based on your thoughts and assumptions about people's behaviour which differs to yours, especially when it includes cultural differences, rather than people experiences of their own culture.

Yes your passive aggressiveness may feel smart to you and your MN sidekicks, but to people that are from that culture, you just sound silly and might I add hysterical. ignoring the fact that its very obvious you really need to let your hair down

For any posters or ANYONE that has been a victim of sexual assault, I am very sorry. These incidents always need to be reported to the police. Always!

Please don't confuse that with a cultural way of dancing which has historically been the way of a large section of people and is practised by some of the most un-sexual, remote tribes all over the world.

The hip movements are largely related to the rhythmic sounds and the fact that men and women do this together doesn't necessarily mean its sexual.

Sometimes it can be, but if you had watched a carnival float for instance, you'd see that it wasn't!

And come on, you know if you could dance like that you soooo would!!!

Worra, the general consensus is that if you are attending a carribbean event with carribbean music, consent is generally assumed as that's how you dance to that genre of music. I've not yet encountered an experience where I've declined and a man hasn't just backed off tbh. However, there are unsavoury men from all sorts of cultures in all sorts of situations that don't understand no unfortunately but I've witnessed more sexually aggressive behaviour in bars and clubs than I have at NHC personally.

I can't BELIEVE the dishonesty in trying to say that that style of dancing isn't sexual. I won't even say it 100% is always inherently sexual but for most men yes there is definitely a sexual component. And calling women uptight for not liking it... foolish and UNFAIR. Also disgusted because I have Caribbean friends who complain about sexual assault being more common and expected at Carnival, so not just a cultural misunderstanding. I'm not against Carnival there's a lot I like about it and I certainly don't want it to be banned but the downplaying of the sexual assault that occurs is just wrong.

Also what is up with all WeGon's weird low level insulting

sow, I'm not trying to downplay anything, I would never disguise sexually aggressive behaviour as simply cultural as to do so would be a huge insult to my own carribean heritage. What I'm saying is that I realise that some people do not understand the style of dancing full stop and think that ALL of it has a sinister connotation which is a shame because that's not the case but as Worra rightly pointed out, negative experiences are what stick in people's minds the most.