To complain to the zoo about the wanking monkeys?

[MissHooliesCardigan]

I took DS2 to the zoo yesterday. It's taken me years to get it into his head that he only plays with his willy in private. About half the male primates were rubbing their dicks on tree branches and one was standing right up against the glass having a good old tug.
Then, as soon as we entered the reptile house, we were greeted by the sight of 2 giant tortoises shagging.
AIBU to ask the zoo to put warning up for visitors?

OP you forgot to put 'lighthearted'. Seriously folks it's not serious!

Ffs you think we need it signposted? We're in on the joke you wally

Giles the female was chewing a lettuce leaf. Chivalry isn't dead yet

😁

Giant tortoise sex is noisy.

JennyBunn that's brilliant!

Dying laughing here, can just picture the OP pearl clutching in horror!

I went to a farm and two tortoises were at it! We took pictures and put it on Facebook we are very immature though. Get a room naughty tortoises!

Withdrawal method monkey is clever. No babies for him yet.

DP and I went to the safari park once. The elephants were having sex right in front of us. Discusting

While we were watching them, his mate rung for a chat and said 'what are you up to today then'

if you have any poo.....fling it NOW!

Even the fucking locusts are at it.

I was Shocked to the Core. My poor DDs are scarred for life.

Elephant penis's are weird!!

It's like a snake wriggling around....

TEACHABLE MOMENT: When you touch yourself in public, it reminds other people of silly monkeys

We went to Blair Drummond, the two giant turtles were getting jiggy was my favourite part it was hilarious the noises they were making for what looked like very minimum effort 😂 I just told the kids they were mating to produce babies. Why not just explain Animals don't follow the same rules as humans as they don't understand what is and and isn't appropriate. No big Deal.

My friend use to work at the monkey world down south years ago. There was one monkey that use to literally throw his stuff at people or eat it .....be thankful you didn't experience that.

torrential Thank you. I did wonder whether I should add 'light hearted' but then thought that surely nobody will think I am serious.
It was actually hilarious watching the parents fielding their DC's questions.

The least they could do is hang a sock on the door handle to warn people not to burst in on them.

Won't somebody please think of the children?

I think some people need to visit their GP about their lost sense of humour. I am amazed how many people need a huge flashing sign that says "lighthearted" nowadays!

Last time we took DGSs to the zoo the 2-year old observed that the monkeys were having a 'big cuddle'.

You should elephants having a big cuddle.

Passes op a

I've got a terrible bad back this morning and this has made me laugh. Thanks OP!

Teachable moment.
"And that's why we CLOSE our bedroom door DS" (hard stare)

Nobody who was serious would have used the phrase "wanking monkeys"

The monkeys are all at it at our local zoo- kids find it hilarious!

Jenny, what else was going on that meant your DC missed the front row view of baboon copulation?!

See, wondered about it being a joke, hence me asking but this place is that bonkers at times I couldn't be sure! Make no mistake, there will be mothers out there who want wanking monkey warning signs!

I witnessed a large gorilla having a good old wank behind the glass. I could have walked away, but just stood mesmerised until he finished and licked it all off his hand.
I should have walked away .