Feel free to correct me, but if one does not wish to hear "fucking pissflaps" than one should consider

[HoneyDragon]

standing around on some else's property?

Meh.

People are far too easily offended these days.

'Specially when they are noseying around my property.

Your house, your property your swears

I sometimes forget that my front door is open a lot at the moment due to the unusual weather (lots of sunny days just now!) and although I have a large private yard I do wonder if some random delivery guy looking for a house (they can never find the houses round here despite them all being named!) will hear me 'fuck fuckity fucking' if the need arises

Laughed out loud at the diagram! Now people are looking at me strangely...

Oooh Dixie I do like these;

• sanctimonious twatbucket
• douche canoe

Tomorrow I will work through this thread and list all my new swear words.
Happiness [sigh]

Cat bummers made me howl lol too funny

Arf, fair point if I did it out the front door .... but they walked beyond it and round the corner. I think they were looking at my garage.

I'm nice, I've actually shown random people around my house when they've been looking and are thinking of buying. But I cannot moderate my behaviour on the basic people might be lurking by my bins

Honey dragon Awesome picture you may be slightly over invested

I'm pretty sure that the WI ladies will think twice about inviting you to the summer fete in future.

Ps you do realise you are going to end up being introduced to one of these women at a social function at some point soon ?

Love the drawing.

Pissflaps indeed.

I am offended. Your swearing is piss poor. When you drop the rubbish it should be at least 'oh you fucking cunt' or a sharp 'motherfucker'

Pissflaps is way too mild

Is AnyFucker2 our AF?

That's all I have to add.

I doubt it

She doesn't like numbers afaik

There's two of us?

I didn't yell.

It was an exasperated and clearly enunciated pussflaps.

I couldn't exactly yell fuck off cunt face, it's the school holidays.

The offsprungs lurk.

Ooooh just saw that, I'm discombobulated now. Are they like side bollocks or is AnyFucker spawning?

Cunt face is just rude. A muttered fuckyoumotherfucker was all that was needed.

Is it like the gremlins?

Don't feed or get wet after 8pm or they multiply

What the fuck are side bollocks? Is that what Tom Daley gets when he puts his trunks on back to front?

There can't be a AnyFucker and an AnyFucker2

I had one of my colleagues look at me in awe and resignation combined when we were having a discussion of colleagues version of "putting stuff away properly" and ours.
He asked the question, "Why oh why do they find it so difficult to put the boxes of paper on the shelf instead of in front of the heavy equipemnt cupboard?"
He wasn't expecting the words "Because they're hoofwanking bunglecunts, that's why".

I am in awe of your drawing skills, HoneyDragon

You need to practice quick recovery, like the woman who just rang me:

Is that Ted?

Sorry, think you've got the wrong number

Oh fu....nk you very much....

YANBU about being pissed of that they were on your property.

But I imagine the gold medal in catsbumfacery was a natural, even involuntary reaction. You have every right to swear; they have every right not to like what they heard.

I think direct sweating works best. 'You stupid fucking cunt' always goes down well, especially when directed towards the headmaster of your son's school on prize giving day when some other little twat faced shit gets made head boy.

Robbing AnyFucker's name, you cheeky fucker?