to expect grandparents to prepare a meal if they are babysitting at dinner time

[ilovemypjs]

I have been a sahm for 8 years and returned to work 10 weeks ago. My Mil volunteered to have my kids 1 day a week from after school (she has my youngest all afternoon as he doesnt start nursery until sept) until my partner gets home at about half 6 ( my other 2 shifts i am home in time to cook dinner myself). Every week i leave food that my 12 year old can cook for himself and his brothers as mil wont cook for them. Yesterday i had to do compulsory overtime and asked my mum to have them but it was over dinner time and a lot of fuss was made as she felt what i had left was too time consuming for my 12 to do and let him cook something else and when i queried it with her she got really upset and is now not speaking to me. So really i am just wondering what other people do when family babysit at dinner time?

my parents will cook themselves tea and put some on for the children....if its a babysitter I will make a pasta dish and leave for her to heat up for her self and the children.
Pasta and veg can be cooked in advance and heated up.....if its an issue have some toast and wait for mum or dad to get home

My mum would've looked at me as if I was mad if I came with a separate meal for the kids.

This. Mum enjoys cooking new things for my two (and me and DH) but she is a bit of a feeder!

I'm at the amount of grandparents who won't cook/help cook food for GDC's. We are clearly very spoilt here as both sets of parents are always happy to provide and cook food, sometimes for us grown ups too!

Will count my lucky stars!

I wouldn't expect my parents/in laws to cook for my kids but I know they absolutely would without me even having to ask. They may let a 12 year old do it if I was trying to give him some independence but they would be standing over him fussing thinking it should be their job!

I don't have grandchildren yet but when I do, there's no way I'd watch a 12 year old cook for all the kids. I'd have to do it for them. If the 12yo wanted to help, I'd let them but they're still children at that age. My 14yo dd and 14yo dss made a bolognese from scratch through the holidays together. They loved it but I was there teaching them and answering their questions and helping them where they needed it. It was fun for them, not a chore.

If my parents or il's had my children at my house I would leave food and they would cook it. They would usually go to grandparents houses though and grandparents would cook for them. I don't send food, if I did they would be offended! I think it's really odd that they don't cook for your children, it's part of taking care of them isn't it?

I don't think those of us who have grandparents cook meals for our children are spoilt. I'd say we were perfectly normal and the ones that won't cook for kids in their care are just weird.

Even my own grandparents fed and watered me when ever I went to visit.

Good food, meals, eating together are all part of our social interactions and why someone wouldn't do that for family is very bizarre.

The only circumstances I could envision sending food for a child would be if they have allergies and the grandparents haven't yet mastered all the safe and not safe foods for that child. Or if the child is on a special, dietician led diet. Though those would be a rare circumstance.

Still shocked that grown adults won't prepare meals for children. Even heating up a can of beans on toast or soup or making a sandwich isn't too difficult nor a Big ask.

If my mum looks after my kids at her house, she cooks for them whatever she was going to make for herself. If she has them at my house, she cooks whatever I've planned.
She wouldn't expect the teenager to cook for him and his sisters.
When my Nan used to look after us, she would cook for us. I don't think I know of a grandparent who wouldn't cook for the grandkids if they were looking after them at dinner time.

I have to either leave cooked food ready to be reheated (lasagne, shep pie, sausages and mash ) or freezer food like fish fingers, chips and peas. My children are looked after over tea time twice a week and neither my mum, mil or my dp (the children's dad!) Has ever offered to cook for them. My mil is retired, and on her own and I really thought she'd enjoy cooking something for herself and the kids but it seems not.