Am I just being female and hormonal??

[hormonalpreg]

So every morning I shower, wash my hair, put make up on and wear nice clothes....this morning I chucked on an old pair of jeans and a jumper to do a couple of things around the house. DP gets ready and suggests we go out somewhere. He says he'll be ready in 20 mins. I say I'll need more time as i haven't even showered yet. He says 'oh, I thought you were ready'.

I never go anywhere without make up...I don't wear tons of it but you can definitely tell the difference; I have curly hair so without it being done, I look like I've been dragged through a hedge. We haven't been together for years and years, I fancy him like mad. I'm also 19 weeks pregnant and am feeling fat and hormonal. Now I think that he just doesn't even notice how I look anymore and obviously doesn't fancy me. Please tell me I'm mad and need to get a grip.....

Well I would see it as the opposite! He thinks you always look nice obviously. He sees you and thinks you're ready even though to you you're not.

Maybe, your makeup isn't as effective as you think it is? Do you wear a lot? Is it natural style or full on with colour?

OK you're being hormonal. You clearly looked pretty decent.

Also if someone is dressed, I tend to presume they've showered.

I have no idea about your hormones but what do you mean by 'just being female'?

You do realise that many females are willing to leave the house with no make-up on and curly hair?

Hormonal. He thinks you're pretty and look lovely all the time. Would you prefer him to insist you put on a full face of slap and change your clothes before he's seen out with you?

I'm with you in that I wouldn't go out without getting showered/putting make up on/doing my hair either. But it's lively that you're DP thinks you look great without it.

To me he was saying you look good as you are. Take it as a compliment 😃

You wouldn't leave the house without spending a long time putting make up on and straightening your natural hair?
Yes, i think that's pretty female OK.
Men are told their worth by what they do, women are indoctrinated to think that they have to alter themselves before being acceptable to the world.

I never wear make up. I manage to leave the house every day. Am I female?

Sorry OP but I find it really off to say "female" but mean "irrational".

Actually I had a friend who wouldn't leave the house without doing her hair and make-up, and I thought it was pretty bloody selfish when she'd agree to an impromptu outing, and then keep everyone sitting around waiting for her.

And I'm not even talking about going out to dinner or anywhere special, just a trip to the park or Maccy Dees

I go out with curly hair and no make-up all the time, does that mean I'm not being female?

I think all round you're being unreasonable. I'm female and my whole look revolves around jeans, jumpers or t-shirts. Should I hand back my vagina?

When I said 'being female' I wasn't referring to the need to be fully made up before leaving the house, I meant the being irrational and taking what he said the wrong way, which I'm sure not all females are guilty of, but hey ho, just my choice of words! Anyway, I appreciate the positive comments and I took myself off for a shower before attacking the poor man!!

so irrationality is just a female thing then? :S Okay...

You sound like the same sort of person that would burn a house down and blame it 'baby brain'. Please re-think your stance. Being pregnant is just that and being a woman/female is just that i.e just fine. Your sort of opinions belong in the 1950s and even then your opinions would be viewed as odd.

Oh go away!! I asked for a bit of light hearted support, not an attack. The way I phrase things shouldn't really affect you and your need to burn your bra. Again, thanks to those who reassured me my moment of hormonal madness was just that

It's not an attack, but these are things that women need to be mindful about - the insidious comments and criticism of the female person as being irrational, hormonal, hysterical and down right unreasonable. It encroaches on us and as you've demonstrated becomes a typical throw away comment.

It's just not on. At various moments I've been each of those terms but that wasn't as a consequence of having a vagina. Some of the most 'hormonal' people I came across were men.

The language we choose is important.

The language you chose was unreasonable.

This is AIBU.

So yes, you were.

The language I chose was unreasonable to you but not to me! I asked for an opinion about my situation not an opinion about the language I used. If you're that concerned about it, you're talking to the wrong person, because I'm not going to modify the way I phrase things when I post in the heat of the moment asking for advice!

No, you weren't being female but you were being a bit of a twat.

Seriously, don't use being female as a way of describing being a bit pathetic.

A bit of a twat?! Wow!

I think it's quite clear lumpy was having a bit of a joke.

Tbh I kind of agree with Red. If your dp labelled you hormonal people would be saying he was a dick.

Or if a colleague at work labelled you hormonal or asked 'is it your pregnancy hormones?' If you were pissed off, they again would be labelled a dick.

Writing off unreasonable behaviour as OK because it's hormones, doesn't help anyone.

Testosterone is a hormone OP.

Do you seriously not see the issue with using "woman" as shorthand for "a bit crap"?

I could also point out that you should be considering why you never go out without make up, but you might find that annoying!

On the plus side, good on you for being 19 weeks pregnant and fancying your husband like made rather than having your head permanently down the toilet