to never want to speak to BIL again

[Awkwardas]

Sisters been married to him for 20 years we've known him For 26 yrs. He's always been a bit funny sometimes fine other times not so, I think he looks down his nose at us. No reason, he's a plumber his dad a dustbin man. Anyway him sis & family booked a holiday so me & my mum decided to surprise them for the last week as its my nieces birthday. We turn up in the second week & bil is clearly.pissed off! We felt very awkward but luckily were in different hotels. We went to see them on our second say & bil completely ignored us, we've known him 26 years & he just blanks us! I now appreciate he wanted family time & we shouldn't have come but I'm utterly pissed off that he thinks its acceptable to ignore us. Would I be wrong to never speak to him again?

And pallasathena as well as being a whole load of speculation and extrapolation, that's just plain nasty

This reminds me of my childhood. We used to go somewhere about two hours away from home every year for our family holidays, but because my grandmother, as well as my parents employees kept showing up, we ended up going overseas every year instead. Some people can't seem to understand the concept of family time not always including every member of the extended family.

My IL did actually do this to me a few years back and turned up to surprise us for the last week of our family holiday. Stayed in the same hotel though. Awful, just awful. Both DH and I were so mad we did almost ignore them. We had to put space between us and them else we'd have said something we regretted. It was not a pleasant week as the two of us were so tense.
OP - I suggest you give them space for the next month or 2. Yes it will take that long. Send them a text/message apologising and then drop it. Don't keep contacting them to see if they've forgiven you. Whilst you are on holiday, let them know you will be avoiding them and see if you can avoid beaches/trips where they will be. It might mean letting them know your plans each day but hey ho.
Give them space, apologise and hopefully it will blow over and you can get past this. Do not however, ever bring it up in conversation again

Is the holiday in Maui?

Usually I think posters are being harsh but for once I completely agree, yabvvvu. I'd have a fit if my family or in laws did this!

Good on you for admitting you were in the wrong, OP, but I really don't see how it could possibly have come to this! You must have had misgivings at some point in the process of booking your holiday to crash theirs. Didn't you??

And so what if it was your niece's birthday? Do you think they booked a holiday that coincided with their daughter's birthday by accident? I'm sure they were looking forward to getting to celebrate her birthday just once without you and your mother taking over and making it all about you.

You definitely, definitely need to apologise profusely and maybe run any future contact with them by MN first, as obviously you have no judgement.

Poor BIL.

I just can't get my head round it.

So... ok... for some misguided and bonkers reason you and your Mum think it's a good idea to suprise your sister, her husband and child on their holiday. I can't think why buy hey ho, we don't know your family so let's just leave the reason for a minute.

When you sit in reception and surprise them or suddenly jump out and shout "It's US!!" and you see the reaction you get from your BIL, why on earth do you think he's at fault. Surely at this point you realise you have made a complete tit of yourself by even thinking of doing this and you backtrack somewhat. But NO, your BIL was horrifed but that didn't stop you. You then turned up on the second day despite the reaction from your BIL. What are you on?!

What are you doing now? Are you flying home or stalking them?!

Brilliant. I love a good bonkers thread!

Op I expect your BIL felt the same way I did when friends of my MIL who I had never met before and DH had met only once decided to gatecrash our honeymoon for the day because MIL gave them the details as they were staying in a nearby resort.

I was thrilled as you can cant imagine.

I think this thread is a bet. It's got to be. Someone's bet the op a fiver that they can't get a Daily Fail article written about their post!!

OP hasn't come back. Let's hope she is on a plane.

My grandparents turned up at the airport to see my Aunty and uncle off on their honeymoon!
You can guess the rest...

This is bad OP , I would be fuming had this happen to me.
How would you feel if your family )who you aren't too keen on) turned up whilst your enjoying a holiday ???

Showing that there's more than one person this unhinged:

www.gransnet.com/forums/other_subjects/1227043-Do-you-think-I-should

I live in fear of my husband's family doing this to me.

Haaa haaa maui!!!

Christ on a bike i cant belive you did that! Thats one way to completely ruin a holiday

Wow.

Haha the plumbers I know are far from poor! at the snobbery towards this!

If DP's family (hell even mine) decided to turn up whilst we were on holiday I'd be absolutely fuming. Are you crazy? How did you think that was a good idea lol.