Bridesmaid has gained weight and can't fit into dress

[StressedOutB2B]

I am getting married in 2 weeks. I have three bridesmaids my sister and two adult friends. All the bridesmaids had a dress fitting 3 months ago thy had a say in their dresses etc and all was fine. The dresses were £260 each I paid obviously.

Today the dresses were delivered and one of the bridesmaids has gained so much weight she can't fit into it and it's cutting her under the arms and won't do up at the back. Straining to do it up she ripped a seam. Ok these things happen but now she wants me to pay for a new dress the other one can't be taken out enough. She's not pregnant in case anyone asks she is a yo yo dieter.

I don't see why I should pay another £260 for her dress she doesn't want to be out of pocket but I think she's being ridiculous and now she's refusing to speak to me and said I'm fat shaming her. I think she should at least offer! Who is BU?

So just to answer a few of the points raised: all bridesmaids went into the shop to choose their dresses so no one was forced into any unsuitable dresses and said bridesmaid was happy with the dress she got.

She's always gone up and down in weight but I don't take responsibility for second guessing what weight she'll be at a certain time.

The hen do was a night out in a local town and she won't need a hotel for the wedding just a taxi.

For those saying could she be jealous- yes she has problems in her personal life she was engaged last year and that relationship ended not long after they got engaged so I do understand seeing someone close to her getting married will be hard but she's known my fiancé for years and they're mates and we don't run anything in her face or anything like that. We aren't youngsters we are all early 30s.

She has always been a bit moody even as kids so sulking isn't completely out of the ordinary for her. I'm just going to go through the motions with her and concentrate on my wedding and hope she can fit into the new dress on the day.

is an explanation for her behaviour, but not an excuse.

THIS

and as the friend is not showing any signs of perking up and at least pretending to be happy to be part of the day now with really only days to go… I don't see it getting any better unless she is put on the spot: "Look, do you WANT to be BM, if so, you're very welcome, but if not, I'ld rather not have a BM who doesn't want to be there"

Op you're a good friend. My offer still stands-I'll be a bridesmaid
Have a lovely wedding and try not to let anything else dress you out. Also have some water ready just before you walk down the aisle because my mouth was so dry with nerves I could barely say my vows!

Lol stress not dress

#Teamchampagne have a total stranger as a bridesmaid

Lol stress not dress

Auto-correct or Freudian slip?

So wait? You say she has a history of eating rubbish when stressed?

What's to day she is not going to be even bigger by the wedding now?

Her weight gain is done, IMO she could have controlled it, but meh, it's done.

Her attitude stinks.

*say

Given her toddler like attitude in the shop, I'm would have told her then and there not to bother as she clearly didn't want to be a BM anymore. You have been more than fair and generous OP. I wouldn't be suprised if more shitty behaviour and stroppiness emerges before and at the wedding. She sounds very childish. If she has such an issue with being embarrassed about her weight, maybe she should have a bit more self control.

Why thank you chipped-my very own hashtag

StressedOutB2B, have a lovely wedding and congrats. Sounds like you've sorted the immediate problem.

Is the dress sorted OP?

You've been amazingly kind and calm, I hope things have settled down and you're able to focus on your upcoming wedding.

Have a fabulous day!

Thanks everyone yes the dress is sorted but I haven't had contact from bridesmaid apart from a text which I will repeat word for word below:

"Fits. I'll try and stay the same for you."

I haven't replied. Sacking her is more bother than it's worth. I've detached.

I'm glad it's not stressing you out anymore I just hope that she behaves on the day for you

Hope it all goes well. I think you've had a name change fail though. Can you get HQ to fix it?