Thrown out of parenting FB group. WIBU?

[FuckingVipers]

I attend a local baby activity with DD (think nursery rhymes and bouncing) and in an attempt to make some friends with babies the same age I joined the Facebook group some of them had set up. It all seemed fairly innocuous for a few weeks but now I've been shunned.

Yesterday one of the people from the group posted. She said her 12 week old DS had seemed a bit hungry so she'd given him a few spoonfuls of tinned tomatoes with pesto. Since then he'd been unsettled so basically she'd decided to fully wean him and wanted everyone's opinion.

I tried so hard not to hoik up my judgey pants but I couldn't help it. I calmly commented telling her why it was a bad idea and you know, tinned tomatoes and pesto aren't so good. I was calm.

Then the backlash! "Omg hun u know ur own baby! U know what's best!"

Everyone attacked me for not being supportive. It got pretty nasty. Not one person agreed with me and by the end the consensus was that every baby should pretty much be weaned before birth and possibly before conception if you think it's best.

I got thrown out of the group and sent a message telling me I shouldn't go back to the group. They're not the organisers, just people who attend. The group is this afternoon and I don't know if I should go.

WIBU? WWYD?

Jus out of curiosity, where's the bit where it got nasty and the message they sent telling you don't come back? Kinda wanted to see the bit

would also advise you to learn your audience..Some pople don't really want advice just want you to validate what they say..Someone who weans on tomatoes and pesto is not someone looking for advice

A few years ago one of the groups I attended with one of my babies ( cannot remember which one but Im guessing during the 90's as guidelines then were between 12-16 weeks) one of the group members babies died because of the food they were fed, it was in all the national newspapers at the time I'm pretty sure they ended up getting arrested and investigated in connection with it (afair no sanctions were applied as it was just stupidity).

Sometimes stupid people who arnt looking for advice still need to hear it

One of the women in my post natal group about 8 years ago weaned a 6 week old onto chocolate mousse. Apparently he really liked it, so it couldn't be bad for him... Health visitor had a quiet word after we were at a group session and she got out the mousse and a spoon. Lost touch soon after, but even as a very inexperience first time mum I was at that one!

Agreed. Tinned tomatoes and pesto? I am 45 and it would still give me the shits

Interesting that the screenshot still doesn't include your comment.

Or anything about 12 weeks and pesto.

I missed the dummy dipped in gravy bit!! Jesus!!

facepalms

If you ask for someone's opinion and they given to you nicely, you don't have to accept it and you certainly shouldn't attack the person who gave it....

yes I'd quite like to see the part of the conversation that the OP was involved in otherwise what's the point?

Where the fuck did you meet all these people?? Dipping dummies in gravy?? First food tomatoes and pesto?? Is this actually a social services run compulsory parenting group? Well off out of it - run for the hills op!

BombadierFritz

Where the fuck did you meet all these people?? Dipping dummies in gravy?? First food tomatoes and pesto?? Is this actually a social services run compulsory parenting group? Well off out of it - run for the hills op!

Ha ha, like it

YANBU. Try and find another baby group - one that isn't full of idiots.

mmmm slop 😁

u did the right thing hun xxxx

I think some people just don't have common sense though really. My cousins girlfriend proudly told me how their baby had been sleeping through the night since 5 weeks. How, you ask? Oh well, she didn't feed him at night because "nighttime is for sleeping not eating and he needed to learn that." At 5 weeks old!?! I told a midwife friend and she was just like "don't do that!" (I'm pregnant with my first child).

Do your library have any groups? I wouldn't go back as I would worry about catching The Stupid.

Find another one. Bitchy mum groups are exhausting and don't change much. Is there any chance you will all go to the same school? If there is you may need to front it out.

Good luck

Needsasock I think I know which case you meant. IT was awful.

What Fucking Mother said!! Stay away from The Stupid. I loved the groups so if I were you I'd carry on going it's not run by them! She asked for advice and you gave it. If she doesn't like it she can ignore it! (She might take your advice roll it in salt and feed it her baby?) If it's anything like the groups run in my area they should sign up to the first foods talk! (Which is available just before baby is 6 months old!!)

she'd given him a few spoonfuls of tinned tomatoes with pesto. Since then he'd been unsettled

No... really? Unsettled? Touch of trapped wind there methinks

She wasn't asking for advice, she was bragging that her baby ate pesto, same way some parents think eating olives is a milestone.

Tomatoes, that's one of my DCs with nappy rash, "burns" and eczema.
Pesto, containing dairy, that's the other one out in hives. Better than a nut allergy though!

YANBU

Sounds like you're better off without them!

That poor baby Leroy died of kidney failure because his mum and dad thought weaning him on adult food was okay.

I would link the news report to the idiotic parents who thinks it's okay hun, you know your baby hun.

When I introduced tomatoes and strawberries, at the appropriate time, to my kids' diet, their arses were red raw afterwards. Fuck knows what it does to a newly hatched one's nappy area

Hun

I think you should go with your instincts

Mum knows best

Tomatoes and pesto? Why? Seems crazy to me.