texting early morning/late at night

[fizzingmum]

AIBU to think that unless it is an emergency there is no need to text or message someone early in the morning? I have a couple of friends who for different reasons are both early risers and will think nothing of messaging at 6am onwards. I have two DC and we have a very good morning routine meaning that we don't need to be up until 7.30, but I will often be woken early as they are up and have something to say, which could always wait. I've mentioned it to both friends and the response ive received has been that I should turn my phone off if I don't want to be contacted. I don't see why they can't respect my request to keep
To more sociable hours. I need my phone on for actual emergencies. My children may be with their Dad and need me, or my Dad might need me. But getting a picture of my friends son enjoying a party from the weekend at 6am in a Monday morning just maddens me! I think that before 9am and after 9pm it is rude to text. I'm also 35 weeks pregnant so will be needing to get sleep when I can. How do I tell them to stop
This shit!

YANBU. I would be furious if someone text at stupid o'clock. Sometimes my friend does it when I'm having a much needed lie in on a weekend. Drives me nuts. Why can't your friends stop being twats and adhere to your wishes? Texting about fish fingers, for fucks sake! Pathetic!

UANBU
I feel for you OP , who likes being woken up unnecessarily?! Plus it's hard enough getting rest at 35 weeks pregnant at the best of times
I used to have a friend who would text in the middle of the night & wake me up.
I think you've been given a rough time on here even if people have a different view what's the need to be rude about it.

Does nobody have a landline any more?

Emergency calls come in via the land line surely?

I never take my phone up to bed with me, it stays in the living room and doesn't have a chance to disturb me.

Mind you frivolous texts directly to you (not social media or groups Whatsap posts) at 6am when you have asked specifically not to be texted so early is rude.

I am always surprised at the number of MNers who think 9am is the beginning of the day and everybody must be silent until then... despite having school aged children who have to be up by 7:30am! Makes no sense! (Obviously some people can choose their hours or work shifts etc. but parents of school aged children can't insist that 8 am is still blackout silent time!)

Our land line often rings at around 6am for DD or occassionally DS1 (a friend panicking because they have forgotten what they need to take in specially that day of suddenly realised they have forgotten a bit of homework) , or I'll get a WhatsAp at just after 6am from one of DS1's friend's mums about something ... (but not photos of their kids). This is fine with me, but we are up then anyway - as, tbh, is everyone I know in my day to day life locally... but I appreciate that everything locally seems to run earlier than in the UK!

Well regardless of whether you mind or don't mind getting texts at unsocial hours (and I would mind, I don't know anyone that does this), the fact that your friends are continuing to do this when you've explicitly asked them not to is completely unreasonable on their behalf

You can set DND on a timer on an iPhone. Mine is set 11pm- 7am.

Get over yourself OP. do you not think your friends might be reaching out & needing to chat with you or have some adult interaction!!

Whatever happened to common decency and respecting other people's boundaries? I see no reason why the OP should change the settings on her phone. Sure she could have the Do Not Disturb settings switched on and have her father's number filtered to be heard but what if it is the hospital ringing on the only number he remembers, her mobile? If her friends can't respect the need for her privacy, they aren't good friends so I'd probably block their numbers if it were me. YADNBU, OP.

At my lowest alone with 3 kids and desperate for interaction I still managed not to text anyone at 6am so you can fuck off with that excuse.

I don't have a landline either so my mobile is the only way to contact me but unless it's an emergency I want nothing until at least 8am and nothing after 10pm and people who think that's unreasonable are mad. It's courtesy and actually if you wouldn't ring someone at 6am why is it ok to text??? Some of the responses on here totally baffle me and remind me once again what a weird place mumsnet can be.

Op sort your do not disturb out..

Yabu there's multiple ways around this "problem" by adjusting your phone settings

I once asked a friend in a different time zone not to text me overnight on that one night because I was leaving my phone on in case another friend needed to reach me (she was in hospital). If it was anything other than a one off stressful situation I would've looked for a better solution.

The beauty of texting is people can read and respond at their leisure.

I feel your pain. I always switched my mob off & so did my dad every evening at bedtime. BUT one day, I was called on the landline & it was the hospital about my beloved mum...we had an hour to arrive & say our goodbyes. My sister's mob was off & so was my dad's... :(
I feel now, I must keep my mobile next to my bed in the case of emergency. I am very upset & annoyed I am woken by Tesco mobile top up alerts, anytime from 6am and random friends on a night out, saying they've missed me. I am stuck between a rock and a hard place. Nobody should ever ring between 00.00-0800 unless it's an emergency. Tell your friends and family it is not okay !

Get over yourself OP. do you not think your friends might be reaching out & needing to chat with you or have some adult interaction

What the actual fuck???? You cannot be serious? Get over yourself because she doesn't want to interact at 6am about absolute shit. My flabber is well and truly ghasted, what a load of crap

Whatever happened to common decency and respecting other people's boundaries?

I agree with you, if the OP has asked people not to text, they shouldn't. However, she can't control other people. All she can control is her phone.

YANBU, OP. Your "friends" are boorish, entitled and inconsiderate.

Block them and tell them future communication, if any, should be via email.

They scoff at your polite request for boundaries, they show what selfish clods they are. Their need for immediate gratification doesn't supersede your need for quiet time. Nor should you have to remember to silence your phone to ward them off.

OP What type of phone do you have?

You do seem very reluctant to listen to any practical advice. 🙄

It's thoughtless of your friends to text you when you have asked them not to though.

APPLE Info on do not disturb

🍏🍏🍏🍏🍏

Eg for a SAMSUNG phone Galaxy 6 Do Not Disturb

Sony Xperia Do Not Disturb

Smidge and no cabbage have nailed it.

Why the fuck should the OP have to go DND because entitled twats think their insipid non-news can't wait till 10am. ??

How about a rule: if someone has begged you for info, text any time. If your text is UNsolicited, restrain yourself till 9 am. No one will complain at the delay, rest very assured.

i often text or receive texts at 2, 3 or 4 am. If it bothers you then put your phone on silent.

I'm agog at these responses!!

I'm an early morning texter, your phone's on, not my problem

Even when ops said on many an occasion.... please don't text at 6am!?

Op YWNBU or a cow to your friends (wtf?) They're being extremely inconsiderate to continue texting when you've asked them not to.

It's like someone chapping your letterbox every morning, and people saying... God! Why don't you just tape it up overnight?!... why should she?

Settings are your friend

I think that if you ask your friends to respect a point you are making because it is important to you, it is bound to make you feel walked all over if your friends don't listen and carry on regardless for years. I would ask your dad and the children's dad to call your landline should there be night emergencies, then you would be able to put your phone on silent.

Texts can often take hours to arrive, so even if people send them at the permitted time, there is no guarantee that they will arrive within times deemed acceptable to the OP. Hence why she should take control of her phone by using the DND feature or simply not having her phone in her bedroomn.

My phone only makes a noise when ringing, never for texts or anything else because I can't stand all the constant bings and bongs - drives me mad.

Most people are suggesting do not disturb or turning the phone onto silent which just highlights the fact her friend is texting her unnecessary shit. If it doesn't matter whether or not she sees the message then it didn't need to be sent at all.