texting early morning/late at night

[fizzingmum]

AIBU to think that unless it is an emergency there is no need to text or message someone early in the morning? I have a couple of friends who for different reasons are both early risers and will think nothing of messaging at 6am onwards. I have two DC and we have a very good morning routine meaning that we don't need to be up until 7.30, but I will often be woken early as they are up and have something to say, which could always wait. I've mentioned it to both friends and the response ive received has been that I should turn my phone off if I don't want to be contacted. I don't see why they can't respect my request to keep
To more sociable hours. I need my phone on for actual emergencies. My children may be with their Dad and need me, or my Dad might need me. But getting a picture of my friends son enjoying a party from the weekend at 6am in a Monday morning just maddens me! I think that before 9am and after 9pm it is rude to text. I'm also 35 weeks pregnant so will be needing to get sleep when I can. How do I tell them to stop
This shit!

You sound horrid about your "friends". Ditch them or turn off your phone at night.
Poorly dad? Give him your landline number.

You know what OP, spend a cpl nights ringing them at 3am, hardly your fault if their phones are switched on, or they are not on DND.

I always text people at 6am! Including my boss. Most people are up at that hour getting ready for work?! Yabu.

Calling/texting at an unreasonable time is rude. BUT I have to be honest - I do it. I jut assume if someone doesn't want to be disturbed they've turned their phone off/ on silent.

I'm a young old git who will harp on about 'what about before mobiles'. People checking phone every 5 minutes. How rude it is to answer / look at the phone if talking to someone else/ in a restaurant / with friends etc. I don't see why we need to be contactable 24/7 365. OK if waiting for an important call, or older children are out and not home yet etc have phone on. But always having phone on and within arms reach just seems a bit much. Yes teach children your landline number so they know how to reach you if your phone has died.

Use your landlines for emergencies. We hardly ever use ours. It's only our mothers and if DH/ family etc needs to contact me/ us urgently. They assume that if I don't answer my mobile I'll be busy but if land line rings I'll always answer it so urgent stuff only unless have agreed a time to call (as my mother prefers to do! ) We pay for it as part of package with Internet etc, might as have a use for it!!!

So off on a tangent there - anyway your friends are being unreasonable by not listening to you. But not putting your phone on silent if you want to sleep is just asking for trouble!

YABU
You now know that a lot ofpeople use texts differently from you. People have given you lots of suggestions. People have offered to help you find the settings. However, you don't want to listen, so, yes, YABU

Is there some reason why you're ignoring everyone's suggestion of just putting your phone on Do Not Disturb???? It's simple to set up, switches itself on and off at the times you choose, and only allows calls / texts from the contacts that you specify. Maybe you just prefer whinging about it rather than sorting it out?

Yes there is a reason she is ignoring everyone telling her put her phone on do not disturb (it's like the cancel the cheque thread) - because she shouldn't have to put her phone on silent to stop some needy pathetic gobshite sending her pictures of her pfb eating a fucking fish finger at 6am, she has been asked so she should stop with the rude ridiculous early texts, and in fairness stop sending fish finger pictures of her child fullstop! Nobody cares ever but at 6am I would be thinking they were batshit!

I have the rage for you op but mostly at people thinking op should change her phone, change her number, get a second phone, tell her ill father to use the landline all to stop someone being rude!!! This place is like the twilight zone sometimes

The trouble with mobiles is this ... Even if your friends stop texting at 6am, sometimes text messages get delayed and delivered hours later, so even a 9pm text might come in at midnight.

Surely the simplest and most reliable thing is to make sure anyone who might need to contact you in an emergency phones your land line (no danger of a poor signal, network being down, battery running low etc so they are guaranteed to get through to you) and then you can turn your mobile off.

Also, isn't it supposed to be bad for you to sleep with a mobile next to your bed? (or is that just scaremongering nonsense?)

I put mine on normal ring for calls but silent for texts, in an emergency I would expect someone to call me, not text, why can't you do that? I don't even have a fancy phone!
I texted my friend the other day for a favour the next day, texted late afternoon, she didn't get it till late as no charge on phone so replied back after midnight when i was in bed. No biggie.
I think its unreasonable for your friends to remember your demands all the time, what if others had different demands.... I couldn;t remember everyone's restricted times!

I don't think yabu, my daughters football coach does this. I now have do not disturb on between 10pm and 7.30am . However I keep my phone on in case of emergencies so if anyone rings me more than once it will ring.. My children and anyone looking after them now know this.
The football coach still texts at 5.55. I am no longer woken up by him.

There is a solution and for what it's worth I think it's fucking rude to text so early and anyone offended by this can fuck off.

Just put your phone on do not disturb and customise it so people who you want to be able to contact you at any time can.

Honestly - put it on silent. That is why it exists?!

YANBU OP. I wouldn't dream of texting somebody at 6am for the very reasons you mentioned. There is no need for it.

And the whether or not the OP's phone is on silent or not is not the point - the person sending the text wouldn't know if it was on silent or not, and should think before they text. Unless it's something urgent why can't they just send it later in the morning??? It's inconsiderate. Nobody reacts well to being unceremoniously woken up for no good reason at 6am!

YABU. People text when it's convenient to them, although not in the middle of the night please!

And yes, in my company we do text our manager at 6 to say we're ill, or as soon as we want. The earlier the better. She knows she may be disturbed and is fine with it.

"Xmasbaby11 Mon 27-Jun-16 22:18:56
YABU. People text when it's convenient to them, although not in the middle of the night please!"

But what if the middle of the night is convenient to them. Then that is ok yes?

YABU. You need to learn to control your device, not other people's patterns of communication.

Just put your Do No Disturb on automatic, mine is always on between 11pm and 7am, so I never have to think about this. I also have certain numbers exempted and the thing that if it rings twice from the same number in 2 minutes it overrides it, so I can't miss anything really urgent. It's really simple.

God there's some shit replies on here!

OP of course YANBU but they are,if someone tried to get intouch with me that early I'd age by about 10 years because I'd think something awful had happened to one of my family or friends!

Who in they're right mind texts someone at 6 in the morning,let alone texting a heavily pregnant women that has children!

I had a friend that used to do that,he always had some emergency or needed to speak to me,he'd text me late at night,in the middle of the night,6 in the morning.I have 5DC and a DH and 2 of our DC are autistic.I talked to him about it till I was blue in the face but it didn't stop so I ended the friendship,I had to,it was just to much and it was constant.

Like other posters have suggested have a look at your phone and see if you can sort out those texts not coming through.

I can't believe how many people suggested turning your phone of either,madness!Me and my DH have to keep ours on through the night because I have an elderly Father who's health isn't great and were hours away from my Mil and Fil and they need to be able to contact us as early as possible if they need us for an emergency,FIL has already had prostate cancer,so we don't take any chances.

I have friends who keep late hours, they might message me late at night, I wake up early, I reply when I see it, if either of us don't want to be disturbed we can change our phone settings. Messaging is asynchronous communication, it works even if people are operating on different time settings, that's what it's for!

YABU for telling us about your "very good morning routine", like your friends text you because they are poorly organised.

However texts telling you their kid ate a fish finger or went to a party? YWNBU to want less boring friends.

On the text issue itself - technology is your friend.

But you don't convey bad news by text holidays and most people wouldnt make important night time calls by mobile either. I've had three relatives go through serious illness and passing away in the last few months and all the horrible middle of ghe night calls come to the landline.

Mobiles run out of battery, get bad signal, get switched off, left on the bus, etc etc. If you need to make an important call you don't use a mobile if you can help it.

People call the early morning texters needy. Nowhere near as needy as someone who can't sleep without their mobile within earshot really.

this is insanity. it is easily sorted. what is worse - a second putting your phone on do not disturb and back to normal in the morning, or being woken by a text and then winding yourself up getting wound up?

the world won't change for you. find a way to adapt.

I'm with you OP. I can't understand all these responses. I would never dream of texting someone at unsociable hours. I don't see why you should have to turn your phone to silent. It's like saying I should disconnect my doorbell when I go to bed each night just in case some idiot friend thinks it's ok to turn up and ring the bell to have a chat at 2 in the morning, coz it's convenient time for them

Anyway, you've asked them repeatedly not to do it - so it's just plain rude for them to continue!! To be honest OP I would probably ditch the so-called friends as they clearly don't give a shit about you!!

No Babara your wrong there some people do send bad news by text,especially the younger generations now!