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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Disabled/baby change

585 replies

Babyred457 · 22/06/2016 13:10

Have NC for this as I have spoken to friends about it and don't want to be outed!

DH and I are members of the gym and pool at a local hotel and take baby DS (4 months) swimming there. It's not a large pool and has small communal changing rooms for men and women and then a separate family/disabled changing room. This is the only one with a baby change table and nappy bin so it's the one we always use when we take DS. It has 4 lockers in it so obviously if you use them then you take the risk that you might have to wait for someone else to finish before you can get in and get your stuff.

Today when we were swimming there was only one other person in the pool, a woman in her late 50s/early 60s. We left the pool and went into the family changing room and had just started getting DS changed when the woman started banging on the door, shouting that we had to let her in as she was disabled and this was the disabled changing room. DH opened the door, said that it was also the family changing room and that we were changing DS but that we'd be as quick as we could. She carried on shouting that we shouldn't be using the changing room, that she was disabled and we had to let her in. She was incredibly rude and was making such a scene that I said to DH just let her go first, so we wrapped DS in a towel and waited, poor DS was kicking off but so was this woman and I tend to back down when people challenge me. DH however was fuming and went and spoke to the manager (dripping everywhere!) who agreed that it was both a family and a disabled changing room and that it's first come first served, no one has priority.

FWIW the woman no obvious physical disability (although MN has taught me that not all disabilities are obvious) and I don't think there was any reason why she couldn't have waited five minutes, she was also extremely rude. Had she approached at the same time as us I'd probably have let her go first anyway but she saw us leave the pool and go in there with DS (you can see the changing room from the pool!) so clearly then took a deliberate decision to get out herself at that moment and start banging on the door in an extremely aggressive manner.

So who was BU? It's difficult because almost all the restaurants etc I go to have the baby changing facilities in the disabled toilets. I would always happily fold a buggy or get off a bus for a wheelchair user etc but should a person with a baby have to exit a disabled loo or changing room mid-change for a disabled person? After all what would the disabled person do if another disabled person was already using the facilities?

OP posts:
Mummyme1987 · 23/06/2016 14:26

No probs X

Mummyme1987 · 23/06/2016 14:30

i was also annoyed as my seat and back soaks up rain then makes my back and bum wet all day

Maryz · 23/06/2016 15:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pineappleshortbread · 23/06/2016 18:23

I have read the whole thread and theres a lot of nasty comments on here which is unfortunate.

Where I live the vast majority of disabled loos are dual use and are the baby changing facilities aswell so of course they are used for that. I know I did when mine were babies. They should be seperate it would make life easier pkus baby change areas dont necessarily need a loo.

Marks and sparks have great ones where they have seperate changing areas which is great but if they arent seperate you cant expect parents with babies not to use them

laidbackneko · 23/06/2016 18:30

MaryZ or like badly baked bread. All hot air and bad proofing.

laidbackneko · 23/06/2016 19:00

There is an upmarket tapas bar in the Marylebone area that has a separate Mens loo but the Womens loo is also the disabled loo. WTAF? WHAT is the logic in that?

laidbackneko · 23/06/2016 19:00

Both men's loo and women's/disabled are single occupancy.

laidbackneko · 23/06/2016 19:01

In case it wasn't clear from my first description

OnceThereWasThisGirlWho · 24/06/2016 03:09

Loopy
It was designed by an able-bodied man. They are the norm of course, so they get a loo, and the other loo is for odds and bods and minorities (like women Hmm).
HTH.

GardeningWithDynamite · 24/06/2016 15:18

Once and Loopy - ideally of course you'd have both toilets accessible, but if you if you needed it and you had the choice of a ladies' toilet or a gents' public toilet? I think I know which I'd prefer. Smile

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