Hubby watching porn

[SarahJane333]

I'm not sure why this bothers me so much but yesterday morning I took the children to school, normally this would take about 35 minutes but I decided to drop them and leave as I couldn't get parked so I arrived home 15 minutes early. Dh normally leaves for work either just before I leave for school or just after but he was still at home. He was so startled when I walked in, rushing to put his clothes on and overly chatty about how early I was. After a few minutes I told him I thought he was acting shifty and wanted to know what was going on. He said nothing, was all lovely and affectionate and left for work. He pops back in twice for different reasons, meaning he's now going to be very late for work - something which can't happen when I want a hand with the school run. I think he was hoping to get hold of the laptop to delete the search history, which I've checked and shows he was watching porn. Now is it just me or is that a really strange thing to do at that time of the morning?!

Aibu to be really hurt that I'm rushing around getting our 3 children to school plus looking after our ebf baby and he's sat at home, by himself, having a wank? Not to mention that I'm not very happy with my body at the moment but I'm still making an effort, we had sex two days ago. Plus the dishonesty, he knew I knew something was off, I asked him what was going on and he acted like I was being paranoid, which I'm not generally. Wwyd now?

I think the only person who had a go at answering my question said something about being able to tell by the expressions on the participants faces whether they were enjoying it or not..............

Nope, still not answered.

It makes you look bit OCD

I do actually have OCD.

Thank you.

Idiot.

I have. Beginning to end.

Your reply must have been in invisible ink. Oh, unless you are referring to the post when you said, very helpfully -
"Probably the same way that you choose the music, TV and film content you consume which doesn't involve the exploitation or abuse of anyone."

That ol' invisible ink again.

It's just too difficult a question, isn't it. You don't actually want to think about what's happened/is happening to the people in your wank fodder.

"They presume the women are making their own choices as many do these days, in many things. They dont need to 'justify' it"

Oh, right. So there is no exploitation or abuse in the porn industry? No trafficked women?

What a relief.

I'll offer a thought... Main stream porn with studio production and a clear budget is less likely to involve abused and exploited women than stuff shot in a garage on a mobile phone. I'd hazard a guess that the majority of casual porn browsers have absolutely zero interest in seeing a woman beaten and raped and would not seek that out. Of course it, and far worse, can be found if you know where to look but lots of people aren't looking. The depressing thing is that it's impossible to discuss this with rad fems who insist that every woman is a victim and must be saved from her own tiny mind by the much cleverer women who can tell her all about how sub-standard and incapable she is. It's tedious in the extreme and grossly insulting (not to mention hugely ironic!). Let's not start on the slathering need to round house on anyone who dares to have a penis. Throwing insults and repeating yourself like a manic echo isn't debate.

"The depressing thing is that it's impossible to discuss this with rad fems who insist that every woman is a victim and must be saved from her own tiny mind by the much cleverer women who can tell her all about how sub-standard and incapable she is. It's tedious in the extreme and grossly insulting (not to mention hugely ironic!). Let's not start on the slathering need to round house on anyone who dares to have a penis. Throwing insults and repeating yourself like a manic echo isn't debate."

Gosh. What a very vivid imagination you have! Who did you imagine said all that stuff?

But as I said earlier- so much easier to lash out at feminists, or some other target group than address the much more difficult question of exploitation.

There's 13 pages of pro porn people evading and wriggling and accusing people of being prudes and feminists and all sorts of other shocking things- because thinking about the porn industry exploiting people is too uncomfortable. And they either want to use porn themselves, or want to justify other people in their lives using it. They want to believe that everyone involved in porn is making a completely free choice, and it's all sunshine and roses that they have always wanted to make their living sucking cock because they enjoy it so much and of course they earn so much money........The naivety is breathtaking!

You know what I love about MN? The familiarity. Certain threads attract certain posters. The arguments never change. We never reach a conclusion.

Anyway, OP, I'd be furious if my partner was sitting on his arse, doing anything for his own pleasure (wanking, sleeping or watching tv) when I was running around caring for our children. YANBU to be angry with him. I don't like porn either and would be fucked off at him watching where a child could walk in.

Yep. Dodging the question again.

Really? I've said repeatedly thatsome people maybe exploited, but that's not the case for all, just like a lot of industries.
Some people do do this willingly and are not exploited.
It may not be what some people like the idea of, or fit there ideas, but still.

So basically you're saying you don't actually care if the people who provide your jollies are exploited or not. Why didn't you all just say that at the beginning?

VoyageofDad - if you address me by name I will obviously reply.