Any others who truly prefer to be alone?

[Oldisthenewblack]

Just that. I can only completely relax when I'm totally alone and there's no prospect of anyone bothering me any time soon. I prefer my own company, and don't like watching films, TV programmes with others. I've always been like this and it doesn't bother me. It only bothers me when other people insist it's odd, and try to pressure me into being a person I'm not. I live alone and am more than happy with this; think it would kill me to have to share a space with someone else!

So, I'm just hoping to hear from others who perhaps feel the same. To reassure me that I'm not the only one

I'm an introvert.
There are people I enjoy spending time with, but I really struggle when it comes to people I don't know and the hell of small talk. I've been accused of being snobby and stand off-ish when actually I'm quite shy and feeling awkward because I just can't think what to say to people.
I need plenty of alone time to recharge. My eldest is now at school and my youngest has a nap in the afternoon and this time is heaven to me! Now I love my boys very much and I love spending time with them, but I need breaks.
Sometimes I get up early so I can have some quiet time downstairs before the daily chaos begins!

I have found my people!

YY to needing solitary time to recharge - if I don't get enough down-time, I can start to feel depressed. In fact, I stop talking altogether and just clam up. I love seeing my friends and we always have a laugh and a good time, but do I want to watch a film with them? Do I buggery. I find it so tedious sitting in silence, pretending to laugh along at the "funny bits" and wishing I could just go off and potter.

Has anyone noticed if, as you get older, you become more introverted? I find small talk with strangers a lot, lot harder than I used to. Unfortunately my job involves a lot of this sort of thing at charity/network events and you would think after 10 years I'd be used to it, but I find it more and more unbearable.

My people are here!

I need huge amounts of alone time or I actually start feeling incredibly anxious. I go to bed early just to lie in a dark room by myself and get up at 5.30 so I can have a cup of tea in absolute peace and quiet.

Agree with PP who said going into another room isn't enough. I need to be ALONE. Everyone else out of the house or it just doesn't cut the mustard.

Yes iggy I think I'm more introverted the older I get - I hate small talk, am really crap at it. I actually have a conference/networking event tomorrow but I'm kind of looking forward to this one as it's in another city and I know I'll have time in the train on the way there and back to recharge/decompress. I don't mind doing some chatting if I have guaranteed alone time either side of it! An hour and half of reading, listening to podcasts, staring out the window..lovely!

Yes me. I think of the dc going off to uni and how lovely the peace will be (I love them to pieces and will probably be gutted when they go). I dream of living in a little cottage with a gorgeous cottage garden and spending my days pottering. Ah bliss!

I love having the house to myself during the day when the DC are at school - I'm lucky enough to work from home. DC are teenagers and we are all a bit the same. In the evenings they all hang out in their rooms and appear downstairs periodically to empty the fridge.

I make myself go out and see people sometimes because I feel I should, but secretly I'm always pleased if they cancel.

I can do the social thing and I enjoy it in small doses, but time alone is a need. I have become a lot more unapologetic about this as I get older. My ExH who ALWAYS had to have an audience and be performing (not an actor just a twat) was at great pains to tell me how defective my introversion made me. I'm pleased to say he did me a huge favour by running off with OW who can now have the "joy" of being his audience!

Me too. I don't have it now and am going mad

Another social introvert here. I've been suffering from anxiety for years now which has gradually got worse, but I finally worked out there's no need to see the GP as it's due to a lack of solitude to recharge since having the DC and there's nothing anyone can do about that.

Yes, every second week my days off are during he week when DH and DS are at work and school. I love it. I do a bit of housework, cook, bake, read and generally chill out.
I seriously need it for the good of my health too.

I love my own company. I'm a single mummy and moved away from everyone and everything I knew to start again. I can't even say I get that lonely, only when stuff goes wrong!

On my birthday every year I spend the day on my own. Everyone else thinks I'm weird but my present to myself is a day where I don't have to think about what anyone else wants and to quite frankly not talk to people if I don't want to. Until the kids came along I'd also go on holiday on my own once a year. I miss those days :)

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/other_subjects/1621006-INTROVERTS-THREAD-shhhh-were-over-here

A thread I started precisely because of this. There are LOTS of us about, but we are not very visible, for obvious reasons :)
I have learned to embrace this as a positive aspect if my personality, rather than a problem

hello my people - I'm a single mum - now single by choice for the past 6 years - I love living alone, love my own company and never answer the phone at home !

I am glad to know I am not alone

toots111, my ideal mothers day is DH taking the kids to celebrate with his mum and leaving me home alone.

Another loner here! I love having the house to myself and i will not answer the door or phone when its Me Netflix time! I have fibro and mostly feel crap and tired, i need alone time to fully relax and i need peace and quiet

Yes. Silence is golden. It really is. Peace, solitude and time to recharge.

Dp doesn't get it, he's an extrovert. He is up at the crack of dawn chatting away and doesn't understand that I don't want to be out doing something every single day or socialising every weekend. I can't cope with it.

I have two dc and while they are at school and he is at work it's fine, I get that time to just sort my head but he's been off sick this week, DD2 was off sick last week (same bug) and the week before was half term. I am very slowly cracking up.

Before I was with DP my dc used to go to their grandparents eow from friday to sunday and I would easily spend the entire time in my flat and not talk to another soul. It was utterly heavenly.

I thought I was an extrovert, but since having children I've realised that I've got a need for my own space.

With hindsight I used to get enough opportunities for it without realising. As a child I had enough space in my house to disappear into my own imaginary world. As a student, I could shut myself off. Being a teacher, I used to get home before DH and get the holidays.

Since the relentlessness of DCs, I've always been happy to have some time away from them, and think it's healthy for us all.

I've always been happy with my own company. As a teenager, I'd separate off from my friends and do my own thing. I've never understood gaggles of girls that do everything together, including going to the loo! These days my solitary release is running on my own, preferably in the countryside.

Oh my god, I love you all!!!! I feel exactly the same!!!! I love my own company, crave it in fact. I have a husband and a three year old and my greatest pleasure is getting away from them, even though I love them dearly

I love it when I've got the house to myself. No prospect of being bothered. Mind you, when I was little I used to shut myself in cupboards with the lights off for as long as I could get away with it.

I love being alone, but luckily DP is also an intovert so we give each other plenty of alone time. We both go for solo walks, have early nights or long baths alone, and encourage the other one to go out on a regular basis. The DC are also fairly introverted, but they need a bit more people time than us.

I do need human contact after a while though. The longest I've gone without a conversation with anyone else is two weeks, and was about my limit - I started chatting to a shopkeeper, and knew it was time to make proper contact with other people again.

I am very chatty and sociable, but if I don't get regular alone time I start to feel like I'm cracking up. DH was going out last Saturday night and suggested i invite a friend over for some company. Now I love my friends, but the thought of missing out on having the house to myself (apart from sleeping DC) and not having to talk to anyone just about gave me palpitations!! I am an HCP and spend a lot of time talking to people at work, then with two young DC there's a lot of chatter. If I can't get a couple of hours by myself I get to feeling anxious and almost claustrophobic.

Has anyone noticed if, as you get older, you become more introverted?

Now that you mention it, I've always been this way, I think. Your question reminds me that as a teenager (a species not renowned for its getting-up-ness) I used to get up at 5.30, make a cup of tea, and go and sit in the front room all by myself doing nothing, in the dark, for as long as I had the house 'to myself' because all other inhabitants were asleep. I shared a bedroom with my sister and it was the only way I could get a decent chunk of alone-time. As I've got older I've got less bothered by other people thinking it's weird, though!

I love to be alone but I have 2 small dc so rarely get any time to myself. My dh is happy to look after the kids so I can go to the gym or something but he doesn't understand that what I really crave is just some time where I can be alone and have peace and quiet! It does make me miserable sometimes and I fantasise about splitting up because having every other weekend totally to myself sounds amazing! (I don't really want to split up and know life as a single parent is hard work.)

It was always my dream to live alone but could never afford to in London and now have a DP who is a complete extrovert and needs company all the time who just doesn't get it. And now a 6m old baby as well