To be fed up of feeling like I'm a second-class member of society

[Mummyme1987]

I had a serious car accident a few years ago, and have various medical complications too. I use a wheelchair. I'm fed up with this feeling that because I have mobility and medical problems, I'm not a full member of society. I overheard a now non friend imply that I was a drain on society because I don't work. Lately I've had issues with people talking over me, at a checkout I'm ignored and even though my hand is out for the change it's given to my husband. Little things like people moving my wheelchair so I'm facing the wall. Even moving me so I bash my toes. And then there is the parking issues, comments about being too young to have mobility problems, like being young stops car accidents. I've put on weight since the accident, so i get a lot of too fat to walk comments. Why do people do this? My family are fab, we have other disabilities in the family, and at home I don't feel this way. Im now finding I don't enjoy leave the house unless I have too. Im fed up with other people's attitudes. When I have talked to these people about the attitude, they always try to lay it at my feet with the dont be so sensitive, maybe you are depressed (I'm not), I'm actually really happy, I just am fed up with your attitude! Im not even sure why i am writing this but it has boiled ever today.

It's been surprisingly well received for a middle of the night rant from me.

I think it has enlightened some people too

Though I could equally do a stupid things agency carers say too! Had some beauties over the years. Including one who gone out with three times who insists asking me over and over "do you have your keys" when I'm leaving the flat. Honesty really??? I've never in my life forgot my keys, I've always lived by myself so you know I never been "allowed" to forgect my keys in the luxery there will be someone else at home to let me in. They know I'm not got memory problems yet still we go through this saga!

Not mention fact I can't lock flat door without keys so you know unless I'm going forget to lock it as well .....its just draining to be treated like your stupid!

😩

Feeling so guilty this morning as have sent DS to school in a taxi on his own. It's the first time I've done anything like it, so I went out and spoke to the taxi driver and paid him about three pounds more than usual for the journey. I just couldn't manage to leave the house today, I am in massive amounts of pain and currently treating what I think may be a bowel obstruction. He is almost eleven and we're looking at him going to school on his own next school year, using the buses, but I still feel bad because I am not capable of doing something I should be.

Part of the reason I'm in such a bad way is because I took both my kids to a theme park this weekend as a part of my daughter's birthday present. I did the first day in a wheelchair, so it wasn't too bad, but I used sticks the second day as it was only a few hours. I knew I'd be sore today after that, but not quite as bad as I am, or I'd have sent DS home to his dad last night.

And I hate DS seeing me in so much bloody pain. He gets all fussy over me and I feel like he's being the parent and I'm the child. He doesn't need that in his life, but I couldn't hide it today.

He'll be okay right?

He be fine! It will be good practise for him and self of achievement nearly 11 is quite old enough to let you know if anything concerns him. He's not 3/4.

Sometimes you just have to do what you can, even if you had managed to get him there sounds like you would be done for the day anyway. X

You could always ring the school to check he got there ok and wasn't upset!

I know the guilt feeling as I have had to do similar but he will be fine. Even my ds with ASD (admittedly when a bit older) has coped in a taxi on his own when I just couldn't manage.
I hope you manage to rest today and feel a bit better.

Disabled parenting is guilt trip upon guilt trip. But they turn out ok. Often more rounded and more caring than other kids, well I think so.

Thorntons have got back to me and are sorting the access.

That's great bet it's not such an huge job for them after all. Bet it didn't apply to all their stores though.

You know I'm getting an idea to do a Thorntons crawl around the country!

I hope you get free chocolate out of it!

Thorntons have got back to me and are sorting the access.

What a missed marketing opportunity for Hotel Chocolat ....

Morning how we all doing? I'm staying off bus thread still much Argo and bad feelings going. How can people be so outraged about something that's law. You end up feeling they begrudge us breath. Do people really sit on a bus with 53 seats and think it's bloody outrage they made one for wheelchairs!

Mummy did thortons say will fix or waiting for head office to do some sort audit? Mind you laughable super big chain suddenly suprised stores not accesable and unaware that their plan b of serve people from street/or whatever is non existent.

Day 2 of prednisone for my RA flare, feeling like utter crap....
But I'll keep on keeping on.

Hope everyone else ok.

Sorry you crap Bishop would offer hug but it probable hurt! I'm trying get agency carer not to complete rearranging my kitchen

Meanwhile (and this should go viral0

www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/quick-thinking-schoolboys-help-classmate-8230436

This is the heart-warming moment a group of schoolboys linked arms on a sports day race to allow their friend who has Down’s syndrome to win the race.This is the heart-warming moment a group of schoolboys linked arms on a sports day race to allow their friend who has Down’s syndrome to win the race.This is the heart-warming moment a group of schoolboys linked arms on a sports day race to allow their friend who has Down’s syndrome to win the race.This is the heart-warming moment a group of schoolboys linked arms on a sports day race to allow their friend who has Down’s syndrome to win the race.

The year six boys from Wrawby St Mary's C of E Primary School in Lincolnshire decided between themselves to come joint second so that their pal, 11-year-old Rory Kettles, could scoop gold.

Proud parent Michelle Drury said that her son Rio and his classmates had chatted about doing it without any influence from teachers.

Michelle said: “I’m unbelievably proud of what Rio and the boys did.

(contd)

That's lovely lurking husband if you learn one thing from primary school should be give those less able a hand up now and again. Presuming he spend last 7 other sports day coming last!

Can I ask in our corner what people's views on EU vote and disability? In still unsure but feel benefited more under EU with regards my human rights also Dave was saying how much we lose if left which can bet your bottom dollar will mean immediate budget and poorest shafted yet again. Am I missing any issues?

Can I ask in our corner what people's views on EU vote and disability?

Well just to look at Blue Badges, they are now issued under an EU wide scheme. Also the EU has driven various initiatives (for example I believe EU funding is conditional upon accessibility audits). For various reasons my vote is Remain, but not because of disability equality.

In still unsure but feel benefited more under EU with regards my human rights

But don't forget the EU has fuck all to do with the European Convention or Court of Human Rights (not that many Brexiters know that)

In.
I don't trust any government of any colour to protect the rights of disabled people and having recourse to the European Court of Human rights is something I find reassuring.

As a minority disabled people can't vote them out, either. And we've seen how much the general public care about disability cuts with what's happened with the current government!

Thanks for your views I know EU court launched inquiry into Disabled people's rights under austerity I thought it gave us extra level of protection if your own goverment kicks you unfairly. Though in places like Greece where benefits and medication has been cut can't see has done much good.

Good issue over blue badges (not that have fund or means to go anywhere!)

Good issue over blue badges

The way the EU works, is to harmomise standards in the centre, and then devolve the administration of those standards to the member states. That's why loads of UK bodies became "authorities" - they are the UK governments appointed authority to implement the EU directive. The best example is the DVLA who are tasked with administering (wait for it !) Driver and Vehicle Licensing in the UK to EU standards. It's why all EU licences are the same (have the Brexiters explained how needing to take a new test to drive in Europe is going to work ?).

(It's also interesting to reflect that when the EU member states were drafting the legislation to harmonise the driving licences, the UK got it's own way about needing top retain the paper part. So much for being forced to follow rules. We made that rule).

Blue Badges are the same - hence the "EU" symbol on them. They are valid anywhere in Europe (subject to local conditions).

Can't see that lasting in the event of a Brexit. UK Blue Badges would not be accepted in Europe as you can bet your life Euro Badges won't be accepted in England and Wales (I suspect Scotland would honour them, and may have their badges honoured in Europe).

Bin day joy again! Managed to drag it back enough but then was heading towards house at angle to get around , slide on uneven paving put hand out to steady self and moved top brick heavy stone off gate post ! In my defence must been loose already! Still dealing with irate householders if I had knocked it off and smashed would really helped my day.

Oh ffs.
I hate the bin day slalom.

Despite feeling like utter crap today I have been getting out and about a bit. Something I'd never have been able to do prior to getting my power chair.

Mentally I feel so much better for it.