To ask relatives not to buy plastic toys?

[MumOnACornishFarm]

I am sure other parents have dealt with similar, so I would really appreciate any advice here. Our DS is turning 1 very soon, and obviously some people will be buying him presents. Of course we do not feel that people should, but in reality we know that most in our close family will. I would really like to not have any more plastic toys; he already has loads although I try to avoid plastic where I can, and I am concious that his beloved jumperoo will still be here in millions of years from now. It doesn't keep me awake at night, but it's something I'm quite concious of.

So, is there any way of me saying this to relatives without sounding like we have any expectation of receiving presents in the first place, and without putting people's noses out of joint? I don't want to make a wish list for him or anything like that, because I appreciate people want to chose what they give. But I would love to avoid more plastic flooding into the house! My partner and I are also agreed that we don't want him to have guns or similar toys, not that people are likely to get that sort of thing for a first birthday (I hope not!) but obviously it's a similar issue that no doubt will crop up later on, and I'm curious to know how other parents handle this.
Equally I might be being very silly to think that I can or should control what people buy him. So, AIBU?

"I think it's worth a try though"

Yup, definitely worth a try! I tried, and I wish it had worked. May you have more success!

We get plain wood rather than painted for this reason

Ref: annoying musical toys, my genius SIL has convinced her 4 yr old DS that there is a battery shortage in London. They spend a lot of time in Turkey too, and he believes that batteries don't exist in Turkey. Wondering how long she'll be able to keep it up!

Artandco have you seen the natural blocks with bark? A friend has a set and they're beautiful. And because they're natural and slightly unevenly shaped, it takes a bit of extra effort to balance and build with them. Her boys love them.

I have seen them. We have lots of the Haba range though, so Iv tried to not buy any more ( as then the storage basket will need to be bigger)

The Haba marble run is a hit here also

Anyone who might buy him a gift say something like 'I can't believe ds is 1 soon, hoping he doesn't get any more plastic toys though!' Or put it on fb, you could even share links about zero waste homes and how bad plastic is. If people don't know you don't like it then they'll automatically buy plastic as that's what is most available.

Yes I'm lusting over the Haba blocks sets. Love all the porticos and onion roofs and things. Although I might be too tempted to keep them for myself.

Ha ha ha ha good luck with that OP ....

Right now I'm feeling a bit jaded about the whole wooden toy thing, having spent part of the afternoon lying on the floor being repeatedly whacked in the face by a Brio level crossing (anything to stop DS2 grizzling, anything).

I've never bought DS1 a toy gun in his life, but he soon learnt how to use sticks as guns from the other kids at his kindergarten. His Steiner kindergarten .

I think you are YABU and would sound precious to announce that you won't accept plastic but if people ask I see no harm in letting them know your preferences. I wouldn't ban all plastic though - Lego, Playmobil, stickle bricks, octons, marble runs etc have all been well loved in our house and are great for developing motor skills and creativity. The flashing, noisy toys usually end up being 'mislaid' and either regifted or charity shopped though!

Over time families do get to know preferences. Yes, we do get the odd bit of plastic/flashy/noisy but as the kids get older family see what we buy and what gets used, and have adjusted to that. Whenever we have been asked about our preferences we focus on the environmental impact of cheap plastic, which most people get.

Ours are nearly 6 and 4, and bar the odd plastic oddity that creeps in the only plastic we have is Lego, and a Design & Drill set that DS loves. And some Octons we got from the car boot. They don't seem to be missing out overly.

I haven't managed to read the whole thread, sorry, but if your mum understands, can you get her to kind of spread the message to the whole family? It avoids the potentially grabby-looking wish list an means he can do it casually and hopefully not make you look precious! IE 'my DD was telling me the other day how much she worries about using plastic. Of course she would never want to tell people what to buy but if you get dgs a gift, I know she'd really appreciate some wooden blocks or a book...'

We are ever so slowly moving towards plastic free, OP.

Like you, it is an eco concern. Wooden toys that are broken can generally be popped into our long term compost heap which is better than recycling or landfill. We tend to accept gracefully but donate any plastic that comes our way in gifts. That includes DH and I.

We are finding the bathroom hardest to go plastic free though. The kitchen was simple in comparison! There are some great websites with very inspirational activists. Try:

http://www.zerowastehome.com

http://www.lifewithoutplastic.com/store/

http://www.trashisfortossers.com/?m=1

http://gu.com/p/4tfpd?CMP=ShareiOSAppOther

Try the ethical living section here on MN too for advice and support.

I'm with the op. Mine are 8 and we've always avoided plastic. It can be fine! It's not just for the environment- although that is a huge consideration- it's also because I felt those bright, flashy, noisy toys that do everything for you at a touch of a button could stem their creativity. It may just be coincidence but they do seem to be creative, thoughtful kids who can stick at anything and amuse themselves in the doctors waiting room with just a book or a scrap of paper and a pencil. So to get round the toy issue, we had wish lists (with things costing a few pennies upwards), always asked for books if people asked, had second hand from some people and 're gifted some stuff. These days people know what we like and are incredibly generous and thoughtful. I also have a huge issue with gender stereotypes toys, which continues to be much harder to fight against.

We try to buy second hand wooden toys but we have bought a few new things from:

http://plantoys.com

http://www.habausa.com

http://www.myriadonline.co.uk/index.php

http://www.babipur.co.uk

Etsy can be good too as you can talk to the producer about the sustainability of their product. The only problem is a great deal is actually made in the US so the shipping makes it unsustainable.

What about plastic toys that really last, stargirl? I'm thinking particularly of Lego - it is simply the best construction toy - there's nothing wooden that comes close - and it is very durable and utterly timeless.

In fact, we've got some of the Lego that I played with as a child, muttermutter40muttermutter years ago.

My Dad has my brother's plastic Lego from 30 odd years ago which my children play with at his house. Lego is a great toy. It lasts forever and doesn't get damaged easily. It is great. But, we are not buying new plastic for anyone, adult or child.

We still do have some plastic in the house. We were given 2 plastic IKEA potties when I was pregnant with my eldest. I have kept them and my youngest is using them now. I'm not replacing them with the bamboo/rice husk potty that is compostable. I will pass them on when we are done.

My 'new' laptop was second hand. My old one died and I needed a computer for work and study. A local company sell reconditioned laptops so I bought it there. Same with my phone although I'm sorely tempted to get rid of a mobile.

No new plastic. When I look at the photos from the 5 ocean garbage patches, I feel like we must try our very best to reduce plastic pollution.

Next aspect is clothing. I have 3 fleeces which are contributing to micro plastic pollution every time I launder them. Learning to knit...

If Lego became a closed loop producer, I might be more amenable to buying some. They are a very long way from that.

Or you could buy second hand Lego, perhaps?

Most of our Lego is also what I had as a child. I don't like the new Lego that's sold as 'sets' as the idea was always just bricks and wheels as imagination and now most new stuff is all build one thing and manuals

I agree about the kits, Artandco - I definitely preferred to buy bricks etc that could have lots of uses, not just for one kit.

Plus, when I had spent ages building a steam train or Dumbledore's office, it hurt when it was dropped or taken to pieces!

If I saw Lego in a local charity shop or on Gumtree, I would consider buying it.

I have plastic guilt!
I recycle wherever possible but it's just not possible to live a plastic free life. I think plastic pollution (micro plastic contamination of food sources) will prob be the end of mankind above antibiotic resistance, but way off in future and there's no stopping it!
Good to try though

It certainly is possible to completely eliminate single use plastics though. The Marine Conservation Society have a campaign about SUPs next month. Why not join in?

http://www.mcsuk.org/plasticchallenge/