Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

"He won't be as handsome as my son. Never mind." Gutted by comment from random woman

173 replies

1Potato2 · 21/05/2016 20:58

On Friday I went with Dd and 4 month ds to the library to kill time. Random woman in her early 70s starts chatting about wishing he will live as long as her relation (104 apparently) and finished off with the comment in the title. I didn't process this at the time as I was keeping an eye on Dd and ds was threatening to poop. It has bugged me since. :(. He's a lovely smiley chap and can't help thinking wtaf?! Anyone else experienced this?

OP posts:
Elmersnewfriend · 21/05/2016 21:03

I am sure that was just a joke - as in no baby is as beautiful as your own. I'm sure your DS (and DD!) are totally beautiful though!

Flashbangandgone · 21/05/2016 21:03

I realise this was hurtful, but you try and can console yourself that it was hurtful bollocks... There's no way she could know how handsome your son will be... And even if she had a crystal ball, handsomeness is highly subjective.

FerkTheeesSheet · 21/05/2016 21:04

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Buzzardbird · 21/05/2016 21:05

Oh bless her, she just loves her son and has no filter. You will probably think the same, but just won't say it out loud.

RJnomore1 · 21/05/2016 21:07

She doesn't sound bitter and that's a bit out of order ferk.

Op I'd take it as someone else said - no one is ever as gorgeous as your own child and its a shame for everyone else, in. But of a joking way. I'm always sorry for all those parents who don't have as beautiful talented children as I do too😁

spanky2 · 21/05/2016 21:07

Who cares what she thinks! It's just her opinion it's not the truth. Just repeat 'what a rude woman'. I'm sure when you look at your ds there will never be a boy as beautiful, unless you have another ds !

GloGirl · 21/05/2016 21:09

I would assume it was just a joke.

MissWimpyDimple · 21/05/2016 21:11

I would take that as her son now being dead. Perhaps even as a baby or child? Hence the comment.

Odd, but nothing to get upset about. I suppose it's a bit like "my baby is the most beautiful baby in the world".

WanderingTrolley1 · 21/05/2016 21:11

Get a grip.

CrockedPot · 21/05/2016 21:11

Don't give it any more head space. Pointless, meaningless comment. Her son is probably no more handsome than the next bloke and who cares?

gingerboy1912 · 21/05/2016 21:12

Sounds like she was reminiscing and just blurted it out. I wouldn't worry too much.

HarlettOScara · 21/05/2016 21:12

I wouldn't have been able to stop myself from saying 'your son must take after his father then'.

Don't give her another thought.

Abraid2 · 21/05/2016 21:13

My MIL once told me that my daughter, then about one, was 'not exactly ugly'. All I heard was the word ugly. In her very reserved way she was trying to tell me that my daughter was pretty. I think I was still a bit hormonal at the time.

WorraLiberty · 21/05/2016 21:14

Hurtful?

Bitter old person?

WTF is wrong with some people? Confused

It was just a random throwaway comment and of course he wont be as handsome as her son, in her eyes!

ThisCakeFilledIsle · 21/05/2016 21:14

I would assume it was a joke at her own expense!

If none of the rest of her chat was " bitter" then it was probably just wry humour.

NaffOffMartha · 21/05/2016 21:15

I assume it was just a bit of a silly 'proud mother' joke, as the fact that she wished him very long life presumably means that she meant well towards both you and him.

If he's 4 months old it's obviously not any sort of value judgement on his perceived good looks or otherwise.

I would take it as a joke OP, I think it's best for your mood as well!

AgathaMystery · 21/05/2016 21:16

If her son is Ryan Reynolds YABVU Wink

TaIkinPeace · 21/05/2016 21:16

"your son might be handsome, mine will be likeable"

says the person whose midwife on delivering DC2 said
"its lucky he's a boy cos he'd be an ugly girl" Grin

AnnaMarlowe · 21/05/2016 21:16

I'd tell you that you were overreacting but I'm still furious a bit peeved that 8 years ago on first seeing my baby twins an acquaintance said "she is much more beautiful than him".

Now my DD is gorgeous but so is her brother!!! I console myself that they are both much better looking that the woman concerned's children.

Shall we share a grip?

ConferencePear · 21/05/2016 21:19

I would assume that she's sharing the harmless joke that we all think our sons are going to be handsome when they're that age.

FerkTheeesSheet · 21/05/2016 21:21

Well ... if it had just been the comment, you could have taken it to be a supposedly funny remark delivered in an offhand way. The 'never mind' on the end is what makes me think she is a bit bitter and the comment should be taken as a slight. The 'never mind ' is the sort of remark you make when you want an insult to have a bit of an extra kick to it!

igglepiggleisanarsehole · 21/05/2016 21:21

Could she be a bit demented?

MegGriffin1 · 21/05/2016 21:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

OneMagnumisneverenough · 21/05/2016 21:23

Sometimes old people are just weird. She has no idea how handsome your son will be, I am sure he is perfectly lovely. I would also say that as babies DS1 was by far the better looking, i used to feel so sad for DS2, I loved him with all my heart the same as DS1 but I used to think it was a shame he wasn't as good looking and that he was bound to be jealous of DS1 as they got older. That was complete bollocks, by the time they were toddlers they were both equally handsome and cute. Trying to look at it from an outsiders pov now that they are teenagers, I think it comes and goes about who is the better looking but I think at the moment DS2 is edging it mainly because he is a bit more smiley and DS1 is going through a really shy self conscious phase, my beautiful boy is still in there though. Anyway, that was a bit of ramble, but was just trying to say that you just can't tell, and really it doesn't matter. Looks are a lot to do with personality and charisma as much as facial features. I am proud of my kids for who they are and the kindness and thoughtfulness they show to others. They always look gorgeous to me. Possibly just average to others though.

timelytess · 21/05/2016 21:24

That's hilarious!
Don't give it a second thought. He is and will be absolutely gorgeous.