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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to ask what became of your birth plan?

186 replies

ollieplimsoles · 14/05/2016 00:15

I just found my birth plan, stuffed down the back of dh's desk.. We never even took it to the hospital!

I had plans of a lovely calm homebirth, no drugs, just hypnobirthing and a water pool.
In the event I was induced and just went with the flow.. I get that a birth plan can be useful if you cant communicate for whatever reason, but I don't think ill bother making one next time.

Did anyone get exactly what they wanted from their birth plan?

OP posts:

Champagneformyrealfriends · 15/05/2016 12:17

Wanted a water birth with minimal pain relief.
Got preeclampsia, a failed induction, a c section and continued hypertension.

scaryteacher · 15/05/2016 12:40

Mine was easy, to get the baby out, with pain relief if needed, and only gas and air. It worked.

ToadsforJustice · 15/05/2016 13:57

OP, in answer to your question, my birth plan stayed in my bag. The MW scoffed when I said I had one. I wanted to have my baby in peace and quiet like my DM. She had her DC at home and that's what I wanted for myself. I was refused a home birth (no reason given) and because I was young and naive, I didn't think I could challenge the decision.

I ended up with a non-medicated forces delivery in stirrups with the world and his wife watching. An episiotomy I didn't consent to. Manual removal of the placenta and stitches with no pain relief. Everything I didn't wish for.

I did however go on to have three homebirths where it was just DH and me. No MW, no drugs and no rough internal exams without my consent. Having a shower in my own bathroom, being tucked up in bed cuddling my new baby and drinking tea and eating hot buttered toast was bliss.

3luckystars · 15/05/2016 14:13

For my first birth I didn't bother because I thought they were a crap idea and would just lead to disappointment.

For my second I actually did write one, but it was preferences more than a plan, just one page saying:
I am totally ok with whatever happens on the day, I do not want a forceps used and would like loads of monitoring of the babies heart please.
I would like to try to breastfeed.
Thank you for looking after me.
That was about it.
It was nice to have something written down and not to be trying to get these wishes across while roaring in pain.
The midwife read in in about a minute and she was happy with the info.
I would probably do similar again, hopefully I will get the chance in a few weeks.

NicknameUsed · 15/05/2016 14:40

No MW or any medical professionals at all Toads

It's a good job you had no complications.

unimagmative13 · 15/05/2016 15:15

I'm going to sound thick how do you do it without anyone there? Do you cut your own cord? How do you know if you are ok and stuff?

captaincake · 15/05/2016 15:17

My birth plan just said epidural asap. I ended up getting it far too late at 10cm and it didn't kick in fully till after DS was born because they didn't believe I was as far gone as I was. Lots of eye rolling instead of help

FeckOfffCup · 15/05/2016 15:30

I know someone whose birth plan was a home water Vbac, no talking, no examinations, and when she was ready to deliver she wanted her DH and midwife to leave the house and wait in the car so she could give birth alone and deliver the baby herself.

It didn't go to plan at all and she was angry and disappointed. In her mind what was in her birth plan was written in stone and she wasn't prepared to deviate from it at all - in the end she had to to save the baby's life.

to those of you who have had traumatic labours and terrible experiences.

aliceross2016 · 15/05/2016 15:56

I had a very short 1 page birth plan with just 5 bullet points, and I had a lovely midwife who did read it. I think the secret is just keep it super short covering what really matters and they will read it. I really didn't want a forceps delivery and wanted ventouse suction to be used if I needed assistance.
The midwives took that into account and I delivered using a ventouse when I encountered difficulties in labour and they would have no idea that's what I wanted without the birth plan, as the doctor was saying they could use either. I think a birth plan is worth it but the key is to keep it really basic short and simple!

Darrelrivers · 15/05/2016 16:02

Never bothered writing one down. I wanted a water birth gas and air skin to skin and breast feeding shortly after birth. What I got was induction, 16 hours of gas and air with crippling contractions bot no movement. Both me and baby crashing, emergency c section under general. Baby in scbu me in intensive care. Husband running between the two of us.

Lazyafternoon · 15/05/2016 16:24

My midwife actually giggled when I mentioned my birthplan several hours into my long labour.

I'd hoped for a waterbirth, no drugs - perhaps just a bit of gas & air if really needed.....

Well it nothing like that!!!! Sky high blood pressure when got taken in so pretty much strapped on the bed with monitors and readings every few mins. Nill by mouth and drip as high risk of needing C section. Epidural. Gas & air while I waited for that to take effect. And that was before I was in 'proper' labour!!! God knows what drugs I was given. Then forceps and much stitching.

But I have a gorgeous healthy little baby (toddler now!), no complications and although feeling like my body, particuarly my nether regions, had been hit by a bus I recovered and wouldn't have changed a thing if it had meant any sort of risk to either of us.

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