to ask what became of your birth plan?

[ollieplimsoles]

I just found my birth plan, stuffed down the back of dh's desk.. We never even took it to the hospital!

I had plans of a lovely calm homebirth, no drugs, just hypnobirthing and a water pool.
In the event I was induced and just went with the flow.. I get that a birth plan can be useful if you cant communicate for whatever reason, but I don't think ill bother making one next time.

Did anyone get exactly what they wanted from their birth plan?

I've had two children and at no point did my consultant or midwife ask about a birth plan or discuss one with me.

Wouldn't have made much difference anyway since they both ended up as emcs...

We were advised by a very clever nct teacher to call it "birth preferences" rather than plan.

First one didn't really go to plan(hypnobirthing) as I freaked out and baby became distressed so had ventose delivery.

Second one, I didn't write anything down but had a very clear idea of how I wanted things to go. It actually went better than I could have planned. It was brilliant.

I didn't write one with any of mine.

I don't think it would have made any difference tbh. All of mine were easy births so there was nothing to plan for and nobody to ask as I found the MW care utterly underwhelming.

I had a birth plan it basically listed my order of preference for things to happen and that I woul like to ask for them in my own time not be asked if I wanted them. Eg pain relief
Paracetamol
TENS
Water
Gas and air
Etc etc down to knock me out.
DH learnt the plan so he could advocate for me and be my voice.
Basically 1 & 3 births followed homebirth plan pretty much; birth 2 emergency section not so much!

I had one prem baby by c-section so with my second although the hospital were advocating a natural birth (which is what I definitely wanted) I could tell that intervention was high on their list. They had a lovely new birthing unit but said that I wouldn't be allowed to use it because I had to be constantly monitored and expected me to labour mainly on my back. They were quite shocked when I told them exactly what I thought of that. The Midwifery team let me down because they forgot to book me a antenatal classes (my first baby was so early I never attended one) despite me flagging up several times that I really felt I needed it. All local NCT classes were fully booked so I even rang around frantically trying to get a Doola, again all booked. So yeah I made an iron clad birthing plan out of sheer panic. Did I use it.....hell no. I had a home birth and laboured mainly on my back! Hubby was great. Paramedics turned up about 45 mins before the birth and a community midwife arrived with about 20 minutes to go.

I had a flexible birth plan, was open to most things, it was mainly for DH to advocate on my behalf really, if necessary.

Had an emergency c-section, didn't bother writing one second time round.

I wrote it at the hospital (very quick labour) they followed it to a T. Great experience.

I didn't have one beyond:

• go into labour
• give birth

The first time, having never done it before, I preferred the option of people a lot more experienced than me taking the lead in it all.

As it turned out, I was induced, so that was that. And then I was induced with DC2, so that was that again.

Yeah, mine was followed to the letter - no offer of pain relief unless I asked for it (didn't have any in the end), lovely, calm, hypno waterbirth. I am aware this is a bit of a fluke though because what happens on the day is largely out of your control.

I had my first, back in 1985, so wasn't asked what I wanted, it was a Hospital that took over.

The whole process made you feel like you were in a Cattle Market/Cow shed. Women were given Pethadine, before being asked and having internal monitors fitted, meaning they laboured lying flat.

So it's good that we've come far enough for Women not to need a Birth Plan, but are treated with respect, iyswim.

My next two, went according to what I wanted, accept for a few glitches during my second labour, such as refusing to break my waters, even after fifteen hours of actual labour. It made my labour hours longer than it could have been.

My DD's BP went exactly how she wanted it. She had a really supportive MW, who didn't object to her wanting her first to be a Home pool birth, with only Gas and Air, at the very end hour.

I had a birth plan, mostly a list of preferences. Asked for help with hypnobirthing techniques, to be gently discouraged from an epidural. Vitamin k injection and skin to skin etc. It was for a very natural simple labour. But having very severe pre eclampsia and an emergency induction changed it a bit.

But my amazing midwife, did everything she could from my birth plan. She knew hypnobirthing and helped me with visualisations, got me in a squatting position as I found that easiest to labour in. Got me up and about despite being hooked up to a drip. She even was an amazing advocate for my wishes to the consultants who just wanted to take for a c section asap. I would have had one if it weren't for her confidence in me. My husband was in shock and couldn't fight my corner, she did it for us and I'll always be grateful to her. So while my epidural, forceps in theatre, syntocin induced labour was as far away from my natural home birth on my birth plan. Having one ensured I got the closest experience possible and while I still have some issues around how scary being so unwell was. I don't have any issues with how my birth went, I felt my views were respected and I was safe.

I'm all for birth plans, but I know I was lucky to have a midwife who followed mine as much as she could. They're only as useful as your midwife let's them be.

I found the idea of planning for one of the most unpredictable and variable experiences in life a bit strange! I just had a few things that I told DH- I'd like to use the pool, I'm open to pain relief and I wanted him to tell me the sex. Thank goodness I had that attitude as i never could have imagined what would happen happened.
By all means have them but don't think it's actually the only way things will go and be open minded, you truly have no idea what will happen and how you will feel. My sister is still so upset that she ended up having to get pain relief etc as it wasn't in her plan! It was 8 years ago!

Birth plan: ideally a water birth, no drugs, music playing, as little intervention as humanly. Back up plans for other eventualities.

Reality: never got the plan out of my bag but got my ideal birth both times. Water, drugs or G&A, my music on and I just did it.

I realise I was incredibly lucky.

My midwife helped me to bullet point my birth plans. In the maternity notes book there's a page for you to write it.

My first was almost to plan, water birth with gas and air. I thought I would deliver the placenta naturally but I needed an injection to speed up it after all an hour with no contractions.

My second birth didn't go quite to plan, they were filling up the birthing pool when my waters broke and There was meconium in the waters so I couldn't have a water birth and had to be transferred from the midwife led unit to the normal labour ward. I was really disappointed but more worried that DD was in distress! It was all a bit too quick and after she was born I was shaking for quite a while. The midwife told me the shaking was adrenaline!

After reading some of the stories on MN I'm so pleased my community midwife was great and the midwives who actually delivered my DC were very good and supportive.

I knew birth plans have the potential to go out of the window so I didn't really make one tbh. Especially after a friend had her heart set on a home birth and ended up having a crash c-section.

That said, the one that really deviated from what I wanted was DC3. With previous DC's I'd had epidurals which were fab so was adamant I was having one again. DD had other ideas however and I almost had her in the car on the way to hospital. The shock of her coming out so quickly made me whinge to the mw that I didn't get my epidural which she thought was hilarious.

I didn't bother making one with my second or third because my first went completely opposite to how I'd planned.

I planned a water birth with only has and air. When I got to the hospital the pool was full. They did let me have a bath though . And it was a back to back labour so I did manage to soldier through 14 hours constant contractions with only gas and air but I was rolling screaming and crying by that point so had an epidural. The epidural was great for five hours, until it ran out and they couldn't top it up so the constant agony began again. Then they discovered he was stuck, cue a million doctors rushing in at breakneck speed shoving forms in my face to sign. Spinal tap, emergency forceps because of shoulder dystocia. I mean that birth could not have gone any different from the relaxed pain relief free one I'd planned if I'd tried .

I don't know anyone where it went right the first time. One woman I know had a home water birth planned but didn't even get chance to get in the pool, baby was born on the kitchen floor!

Birth plan: in and out the birthing centre as quickly as possible, I did not want to spend the first few days of dds life in a hospital!

Midwife - you can't go to the birthing centre unfortunately, you have to go to a hospital 30 miles away.

Cue a 2hr labour, no drugs, got up & showered straight away, very pleased, but I had to stay in the hospital for FIVE days because I had a pain in my leg, no-one actually did any tests, just informed me they were watching me.

I discharged myself in the end!!

My birth plan was useful as it had written all over it that my dh is very needle phobic and will black out completely due to vasovagal response if he sees a needle. So we said if sharps were required he needed to be told so he could look away. A really simple fix but I was really worried he would hit his head or something (witch has happened before as apparently needle phobia doesn't exist, till they see him go down like a lead balloon and then they are all "sorry I haven't seen this before, I can see now why you tried to warn me" one time they even got the crash cart as his blood pressure was so low they thought he died... Thank god I had insisted on holding his shoulder or he would have fallen and squashed the nurse too)

Other than that, it was basically I would like the baby to be safe and I would also like to be not too badly damaged. I am happy to say we stuck to it.

I never actually wrote one but my dream was to have a drug free home birth. Dcs 1 and 2 threw that out of the window by both deciding to come 9 weeks early. Dc3 I was convinced was my full term home birth. I used to day dream happily about it. This was definitely the one. Except it wasn't. And i suppose the problem with any birth plan is the 'except it wasn't' part.

5 weeks in hospital from 22 weeks onwards. Internal exams so often I think I whipped my knickers off every time a dr walked in the room. Drugs to stop labour. Steroids to help baby's lungs. Ambulance rides to transfer to other hospitals. And finally a baby born at 27 weeks. No birth plan could have covered that. Still, she popped out easily enough as she was so tiny.

I had one and the doctors and midwives all read it. I did it on the basis of having a few preferences written down, knowing I needed to go with the flow. It was a comfort in that for example I was worried about being cut down below without being numbed, once the doctor saw this he was all reassurance. First baby for me and my is birth something you cannot plan, anyone with an iron clad plan is likely to be very thrown!

op your birth plan was my first child's birth exactly! Hypnobirthing cd on in background, birthpool in my living room, mw arrived at midnight, baby arrived just before 5. Didnt occur to Husband to take a photo of me and baby until she was a few days old and i asked him where they were.

2nd child very different and my birthplan consisted of do what is necessary and TAKE PHOTOS OF ME AND THE BABY!!!

My birth plan was only to have as little intervention as possible.

Had a standard 9 hour labour with gas and air.

No intervention, placenta delivered fine.

I think it's great to have an idea but as someone said, babies can't write birth plans.

I wrote on mine "totally flexible, no fixed ideas and will take it as it happens. Only preference would be c section over kelloid forceps if need arises"

In the end, I had an incompetent cervix, arrived at the hospital fully dilated with Ds in distress and needed episootomy and kelloid forceps with crash team and no pain relief pretty much as soon as I walked in the door (my mum was still parking the car!) start to finish was 4 hours but deeply traumatising!

I don't think I wrote it down, but it was pretty simple, support to remain as active as possible, which happened. Being stuck on my back pushing against gravity really didn't appeal!

With my first I wrote a detailed plan covering everything from drugs to what music I wanted on. When it came to it though I have no idea what was followedand what wasn't and I couldn't give a toss about it.

With my second my birth plan said that dh should have skin to skin of I couldn't and, 'GET IT OUT'.