To think it's not on to shout abuse out the window at people!?

[Sprinklesontop]

I was walking into town yesterday when a white van drove past me and a man shouted fatty out the window at me

I'm absolutely mortified and so glad that I was on my own I would have died if there was anyone with me!

I am rather fat at the moment, I had twins less than a year ago and I'm struggling to find time to exercise but surely even if I was 25 stone or something it doesn't give someone the right to embarrass me like that.

Don't know why I'm posting really but I can't tell anyone in real life and it's really bothering me.

The thing that strikes me about all of these is that they are behaving like kids messing about not thinking about the consequences. I remember as a kid being shouted at from a car window 'cheer up love it might never happen' or whistled at, horrible as was only 14. Neither of which made me feel good. It's horrible having someone commenting on you like that. Twats.

I have experienced a fair bit of drive by verbal abuse (I used to cycle and I guess there are too many entitled shits out there). One experience was very sinister and (in my biased view) I think that's what they're all leading to.
My experience was a van with a guy and son(?) driving past me shouting about my arse (I'd just finished a riding lesson and was cycling home in jodphurs). As I carried along the country road they'd stopped and tried to flag me down asking me where they could 'get a good time'. I held my nerve and pedalled aa fast as i could. The next day they were on the same road and tried to grab me/ my bike. That time i told my parents who called the police. I was 13. I realised after uni a lot of these comments stopped. I think that these twats entirely get a sexual kick out of some sort of vulnerability so they get off on hurling abuse at anyone that fits that bill. Powerless shits probably to need that. I realise i am bias but i see them all as predatory wannabes.

Last year treated myself to a new bicycle and after a few days built up confidence to use main roads in our v small town. A pick up truck of young men drove slowly next to me making sour comments (am middle aged and chubby). Then began the game of trying to drive very close and tap my handlebars with side of truck to knock me off. I was terrified and haven't got on the bike since.

Don't let some simple minded twat get you down. I'll bet he was far from perfect too. You have your reasons, but even if you didn't, doesn't give anyone the right to insult a stranger. Much love

No, YANBU.

Street harassment is never acceptable.

I like to take photos of the vehicle or person if possible and post shaming notices online about them. It rarely has any effect but supportive comments can help with the mortification and shame aspect.
It's he who should be ashamed, he and whoever raised him to behave like that.

As a teenager I had a lit firework thrown at me from a van. Also lots of 'sexual' body type comments as a teen. They stopped when I wasn't so young, so I don't know if that means there are lots of van driving men out there with young girl obsessions or I have now perfected the 'don't fuck with me' aura.

I was walking once with a friend and two blokes rode past us and one said to the other "Feckin hell mate, I don't fancy yours much" .... I know it was about me as my friend is much better looking. I've never forgot the shame and feeling it left me. I was quite tearful.

I feel disgusted reading these posts, sorry to hear of all your horrible experiences. Mine were minor (although I'm sure there were more instances just I can't remember them now), but it was just the feeling of having a stranger shout at you making you feel vulnerable.

I used to work as a bar maid many moons ago , and was going around tables emptying ash trays into ametal bucket. One twat said oh bitch give me a blow job, so I want over and emptied the whole stinking bucket over his head! All the women in the bar cheered! And he was so embarrassed I felt bloody great!

My boss who was a guy laughed like a drain and said well done!

I'm an overweight man, and I've had abuse when walking my dogs and cycling. From women and men.

It's grim. But some people are weak, and think they can gain power by taking away yours. And I could lift their little maggot bodies up in the air above my head if I wanted to. Not one of them would say anything to my face.

As if I care what some loser in a van that smells of shit thinks.

I honestly can't imagine my DH or DS going this to anyone! Who the fuck do these scum think they aren't? How would they feel if their wives, girlfriends, mothers or daughters were subjected to this shit!!!?

Are, not aren't

No way should you let yourself be upset by people who aren't even fit to lick your boots. Why should a lioness care for the opinions of a rat?

Some people are just bullies, sorry that so many of you have had to deal with this crap.

CoolCarrie my brother (no slimjim himself) was telling me the funniest story ever. Him and his mates were sat in a pub beer garden when a taxi pulled up and a fat woman got out. They were loudly making 'doof doof doof doof' sounds when she walked. She gave them two fingers and got into another taxi and "fucked off". I was absolutely horrified and disgusted. I told him about the abuse I endure and how it made me feel. He went bright red and said it was just a joke. I was pregnant at the time and went crazy at him. I was shouting about how it was hilarious hearing about 6 lads bullying 1 lone female. Ha ha Fucking ha ha! That was 10 years ago and he promises he hasn't done it since. I don't believe him. He sometimes shouts "BANG!" at people when he drives by. I have very little to do with him.

I've had this all my life. Yes I'm big. Always have been. Even when I lost 12stone and died doing it I was still called a fat cunt on a daily basis. Been mocked because I refused to pay window washers who pounce at the traffic lights who stand and take the piss about my size. On the train. Even walking down the street.. Worst are the medics.

Do you smoke? No
Do you do drugs? No
Drink alcohol? No
Oh.. Ok. But you eat for you and everyone else by the looks of things! Erm.. Yeah course. Arseholes.

You get used to it. Flip them the fingers and call them a name. It's a short sharp response but it helps.

I was once abused for sitting on a bus by a pensioner.

I have a disability and can't always walk far. Got on an empty bus once and the pensioner got on at the next stop and sat RIGHT next to me. FFS there was another 56 seats spare!!

She was holding on for dear life huffing and puffing - pushing me into the window and almost sitting on my lap. Moaning about me being 'too fat to fit on the bus'... I smiled. Looked ahead and said nothing. But inside I was livid. At my stop I stood up, and as I did she jumped into my seat.

I looked at her and she was muttering about rude people (?) being fat and how I had no respect for the elderly.

And you know what....? At that moment she was damn right.

So I bent down and whispered to her...

'You're right. No respect for rude elderly arseholes like you. And if you WAS my grandmother.....

I'd have smothered you by now!'

And with that I walked off the bus laughing. She was spitting bubbles - shouting at the driver and spluttering about calling the Police, and he just laughed. He'd seen her being a twat.

And as I walked past the window I gave her two fingers... just to top it off nicely.

Was it mean? Hell yeah...

Like I say, dealt with it every single day of my life..

Catcalling is horrible, abusive, shit designed to put women in their place. It's happened to me in the past, mostly when i was a young teenager

Anyway this thread reminded me of this vid i'd seen. Hope you enjoy it...

And this...

I was walking up the road the other day to collect my MIL when a bloke come speeding around the corner and slammed his brakes on, as a bus had stopped in front of him!
He wound the passenger side window down, as I was on that side of the car, and he shouted "you fucking twat" and other uncomplimentary things which I didn't catch as I wasn't paying him any attention.

I really, really, really thought he was shouting at the bus driver which I found funny as he was behind the bus and the driver would not have been able to hear him!

He then, after fumbling with the gears on his car for what seemed like an age, slowly drove past me as I reached my MIL's gate and shouted something like "you fucking twat, idiot, you shouldn't be allowed on the road!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

???????????????????????????????????

No idea what that was about as I was walking on the pavement with a row of parked cars between me and him!

I was so shocked I didn't even think of a comeback until a couple of hours later and now really wish I had shouted back "you should have gone to spec-savers Rudi!"

Rudi Lickwood? Sounds like a gay pornstar.

It does, doesn't it? It also means sad loser wanker, too.

Plomino, that is such a satisfying story. I hope he was charged?

Apocalypse unbelievable

Neanderthals who do that will shout anything completely indiscriminately. It feels horrible whether it's critical or (supposedly) complimentary and is utterly valueless as "opinion" either way.

Don't give it a second thought OP

Not had anything said to me for years now, but I was with DD over year or so ago so she was only 12 and she was catcalled by a 'man' standing in the doorway of a shop (in central London). I was omg!!! He prob didn't see her face, but it really freaked her out. All these men (and most are men) are complete tossers that should really go back to the Stone Age and stay there. Sorry for anyone who has been upset by their antics. And great idea to name and shame if in a company vehicle.

Oh and I've also been 'shamed' by a medic for being skinny - 'do I eat enough' - I was in my early 20s and I certainly did eat enough (and was a very average size 10-12). Stupid dick. It was 20 years ago and I still remember.