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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think it's not on to shout abuse out the window at people!?

268 replies

Sprinklesontop · 12/05/2016 13:22

I was walking into town yesterday when a white van drove past me and a man shouted fatty out the window at me Angry

I'm absolutely mortified and so glad that I was on my own I would have died if there was anyone with me!

I am rather fat at the moment, I had twins less than a year ago and I'm struggling to find time to exercise but surely even if I was 25 stone or something it doesn't give someone the right to embarrass me like that.

Don't know why I'm posting really but I can't tell anyone in real life and it's really bothering me.

OP posts:
DixieNormas · 12/05/2016 18:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Toddzoid · 12/05/2016 18:53

Always men, usually men in vans... I get it a lot. Some men beep their horns, others shout lewd comments. Most often in Spring/summer months. The sun does something strange to people in this country, I swear. Absolutely outrageous. At least they're not throwing objects at you though I guess...

KittensandKnitting · 12/05/2016 18:57

These stories are utterly horrifying

My mum was sat with my late dad in their local pub once at the bar, and three regulars decided it was ok to comment on a lady who was popping in to have a quick drink whilst out walking her dog, so was wearing shorts and a t-shirt fairly hot outside... These men started commenting on this woman in a rather nasty fashion and my mum who is not shy really laid into them, as they sat there with food down their shirts, beers in hand and their protruding stomachs. And

They then apologised to my mum, and never made eye contact with them again - nor according to the bar lady did they make such comments again - that she heard anyway.

Lemonsole · 12/05/2016 19:01

These stories are horrific in their sheer quantity.

I'm glad that posters have stopped referring to "people" who do this, as it's men. Not all men. But only men.

Fucking waste of oxygen.

uglyswan · 12/05/2016 19:13

OP, I'm sorry, don't be mortified. You're beautiful and that man is ugly down to his very soul. I've got one (just the one) sort-of-nice story: I was cycling home one evening, slipped in a puddle and fell off my bike. I wasn't hurt, just a bit shaken, so I wheeled my bike up my street, when two teenage boys stuck their stupid witless heads out the window and started shouting and making that infuriating clicking sound at me. So I stopped, looked up at them and shouted "I've just fallen off my bike, you aresholes". And their stupid little faces fell and they shouted back "Sorry, sister! Sister, we're sorry, are you all right?" - One of those shared humanity moments, I suppose. Of course I was mad as a wet cat at the time, but now I'm sort of relieved to think that it is possible to remind the men and boys that do this that women are people. Apparently this is something many of them choose to forget...

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 12/05/2016 19:13

HELLO- did nobody read my post?

KittensandKnitting · 12/05/2016 19:51

I did and yes it's not exclusively men

But it's mostly men...

SharonBottsPoundOfGrapes · 12/05/2016 19:57

I read it Sharon. It's not just men. Ok 90% of the time it is. I've never been yelled at by a woman in a vehicle but I was coming out of New Look with my mum and this girl pointed at me and said to her friend "I'm not that big am I?!" I was a soft arse back then and I let it go. In fact that was one of 4 separate incidents where I've been picked on for my size in the same fucking place. It's the reason I don't go there anymore. (To that particular shopping centre if I can help it).

wavingnow · 12/05/2016 20:04

Years ago I was walking past police station when some young lads did this so I found myself walking in to report it as I had managed to get reg no. I was amazed as they took it seriously and they told me weeks later that the lads received a visit from police as someone else reported it too but didn't get reg no just things like car colour.

Original poster
Sprinklesontop · 12/05/2016 20:06

I'm absolutely horrified that so many of you have experienced this! Flowers

What on earth gives these men the right to think it's ok to treat women in this way!?

My dh and the other men in my family would never speak to a woman this way.

To out it into context I'm a size 16 so a bit on the fat side at the moment but I didn't think I'm big enough to be comment worthy.

I think I'm mainly feeling angry that I didn't get the chance to say anything back to them. Cowardly bastards.

OP posts:
FutureGadgetsLab · 12/05/2016 20:08

Sprinkle it's not your size. I'm an unremarkable size 10 and this has happened to me. Don't think it has anything to do with you.

ABCAlwaysBeCunting · 12/05/2016 20:30

Birdsgottafly I was out for drinks with two male colleagues, both of whom I consider enlightened, non-Neanderthal, well-educated, intelligent men and I was telling them about a couple of times I've been groped on the tube. I was utterly astonished and a bit saddened that their first reaction was that it wasn't that big a deal and couldn't women just ignore it.

They did finally get it after I asked them if they would consider a stranger rubbing his cock up against their backside to be 'just one of those things' and not 'make a fuss about nothing'. But it's just so disappointing that I had to explain why it wasn't acceptable.

P.S. I've always really liked your user name!

AerithEarling · 12/05/2016 20:35

You would think the sun makes people happy not nasty, it makes me happy anyway

BeverlyGoldberg · 12/05/2016 22:04

I was at a comedy club once and a comedian named Rudi Lickwood singled me out for a fat joke in front of an entire club. 200 people laughing at me was fucking awful. I endured it until he went off stage, pretended I needed the loo and left. Ruined my night, the money we paid for tickets and the night out we never ended up having because I was sat in hotel room sobbing. I used to love that club and I've never set foot in it since.

Rudi : if you're reading this, you're an unfunny cunt.

ABCAlwaysBeCunting · 12/05/2016 22:09

Beverly That is shit. What a horrid experience.

SharonBottsPoundOfGrapes · 12/05/2016 22:10

Beverly that is disgusting. I won't say you shouldn't have let it ruin your evening because it would've devastated me too. Fucking knobhead. [anger]

SharonBottsPoundOfGrapes · 12/05/2016 22:13

Oops. Angry

Original poster
Sprinklesontop · 12/05/2016 22:16

Beverly that's fucking awful!

OP posts:
BeverlyGoldberg · 12/05/2016 22:19

It was so embarrassing. I was there with my then boyfriend, he's now DH so obviously it didn't bother him. I was mortified though. We were doing long distance at the time so time together was sacred and it fucked our night up.

Wagglebees · 12/05/2016 22:21

Ugh Beverley how nasty. Angry

Sprinkle I was either a size 8 or a size 10 depending on the year so it's not just weight that makes them feel the need to be gobshites. I honestly think it's just because we're women. (In the men's cases I mean.)

SharonBottsPoundOfGrapes · 12/05/2016 23:00

I work in a pub. We have an enclosed beer garden. I caught two regulars shouting at two large women walking past. I pulled them up on it. I made them feel embarrassed by telling them how it makes me feel. Plus I asked how they'd react if anyone treated their close female family/friends in that way. I didn't shout but I made sure other people knew why I was upset. One shouted about directions to the Chippy and the other told them to save some pies for other people. One took umbrage and said he didn't care, it was just a laugh etc but the other promised me he wouldn't do it again.

PirateSmile · 12/05/2016 23:05

I've never heard of Rudi Lickwood so I've just googled him. He's been working as a comedian for 25 and specialises in corporate hospitality.

Let's all laugh at Rudi and his shit career.

SharonBottsPoundOfGrapes · 12/05/2016 23:09

Can someone tweet him this thread? Rudi you're not that guy from the Nutty Professor. Singling out a female to laugh and direct abuse at is sickening.

GingerMerkin · 12/05/2016 23:10

Worst I had was on my way to work, bloke leaned out of his van and spat at me. I arrived at work in tears, was given shampoo to wash my hair and had to take my coat to the dry cleaners. I wore it home that day because it was cold weather then gave it to a charity shop as couldn't bear to wear it again.

SharonBottsPoundOfGrapes · 12/05/2016 23:12

I remember him from Show Me The Funny. He seemed quite decent (the Eddie Murphy thing was tiresome though).