To offer this for tea...

[roleypoley]

Spinach and ricotta cannelloni (from a packet) with salad. DP is furious. Says when he asked earlier what was for tea I should have said 'nothing'. There is also fish in the freezer but that takes half an hour so apparently is unacceptable at 8pm. I've had enough of his mood and gone upstairs with my half packet of spinach and ricotta cannelloni & he's ordered a take away!

I used to eat a whole pack of that pasta for dinner. I was 4 stone overweight mind. Now I would eat half but very rarely - I never eat pasta.

That said, YANBU and he is being an arse.

Did he apologise?

I think the issue here is one of expectation. He was expecting a meal on a par with the veggie curry, so was unimpressed with half a packet of pasta and no sauce. I woudn't think of that as a dinner either to be honest. He clearly acted like an idiot about it but I can understand why. If when discussing it the previous night the op had said well we got a pasta thing that I could do with maybe some sauce and salad? He would probably have not complained or would have had the opportunity to say, hmm that's not filling enough for me, so I'll grab us a takeaway on the way home.

Why was his reaction unacceptable? I mean, honestly, this forum is full of people moaning and sulking because their DHs have been incompetent and can't sort out domestic stuff without having their hand held or a full list of instructions and they're told to read them the riot act and tell them to pull their socks up. A bloke does the same thing and apparently he's out of order and should be begging to sort it out himself. Double standards.

It's not a double standard, it's the same thing! The woman does the work (housework, cooking, childcare) and the man doesn't do his share and then complains that the house is messy, there's no food and the kids are screaming.

OP's husband was supposed to cook, didn't, she made a meal and his contribution was to criticise her for it.

Yes, but he didn't cook because she told him not to, she said she had it sorted. And she didn't.

As far as we're aware there are no issues with him helping out around the house. In fact the one thing we do know is that he is perfectly happy to cook the main family meal from scratch after a full day's work. Nobody has mentioned that he was complaining that the house was a mess or that the children were screaming so I really can't see why that is relevant other than shoehorning in an imaginary stereotype to support a weak argument.

I don't see why he should be apologising, I stick by what I said: If a woman posted that her DH had said he had dinner sorted then produced a couple of tablespoons of dry pasta and a few salad leaves and told her to sort herself out with a bowl of cereal if he was still hungry he'd be ripped to pieces as a selfish incompetent who couldn't organise simple tasks and expected his DW to pick up the pieces and do everything for herself because she couldn't be arsed. She wouldn't be told she shouldn't be cross about it and should be begging him to let her make imaginary chips and garlic bread to sort out his cock up. In fact he'd be called a dick for not thinking about sauce/garlic bread/chips/cheese himself and needing it doing for him.

What a pile of wank. It's never in order to throw a strop because you don't like the food being presented to you. The details are actually irrelevant because the strop is unjustified full stop.

No one is under any kind of obligation to ensure you are fed, and not only fed but fed with food you want at that moment.

It has happened plenty of times that I don't want whatever my dh might have produced. Do I throw a strop at him? No. I say I am going to have something else and head off and make it. Because I am an adult. And DH is not under any kind of obligation to feed me.

I think it's others said, he actually wanted an excuse to order a takeaway. Because if you recall, the fish wasn't acceptable either.

We had spinach and ricotta ravioli with salad for tea quite frequently, it's a nice easy one when nobody has the energy to cook. Garlic bread out the freezer if more calories desperately needed or just an extra glass of wine

Well, we did til I ruined things with veganism. Going to have to find some equally quick and easy alternatives now!!

One packet between two really is a 'proper' serving of those ravioli.

Both DH and I can and do like to eat lots, and I am always particularly happy when I don't have to share the packet of ravioli, so I can scoff the whole lot, but if it's a meal for 2 you just add sauce, plenty of vegetables/salad etc and it is a decent serving size. I am aware when I eat the whole packet that I'm being a greedy git!

I bet you had stuff in to jazz it up with if needed, even if only butter/oil/garlic/Parmesan or some frozen peas or veg or whatever.

He was just being narky. Ignore.

It's not "a couple of table spoons of dry pasta", for a start it's fresh pasta. Also, it's filled and quite high calorie for the size of it.
My dp often serves this if he cooks. It's far preferable to him trying to make anything himself.
I don't tell him it's "nothing" and order a take away.

Mind you, those packet sizes are nuts - half isn't enough for one person but a whole one is too much.

Agree a packet does one and a half people. Also agree that good fresh ravioli just needs tossed in butter and not a gloopy sauce to hide the flavour. sauce is for tagliatelli etc with no filling.
If you have bread with it or follow it with cheese and biscuits or a light pudding it should be fine.

"Mind you, those packet sizes are nuts - half isn't enough for one person but a whole one is too much."

It depends on the pack size. We find a 300g pack of fresh filled pasta, served with pesto and grated parmesan and salad is ample for the three of us. And, no, we aren't worthy health freaks. We don't eat bread with pasta or need cheese and biscuits after such a meal.

Nobody has mentioned that he was complaining that the house was a mess or that the children were screaming so I really can't see why that is relevant other than shoehorning in an imaginary stereotype to support a weak argument.

No, Bill. I was responding to precisely the point you made about people moaning and sulking about domestic duties. You introduced the stereotype, go back and read what you wrote.

And as for your point that this chap is "perfectly happy to cook a meal after a hard day's work" he didn't cook a meal and he moaned about the meal he was given.

I'm beginning to think you're the husband.

No, I pointed out that this forum is full of women complaining that their partners can't sort out domestic tasks (including cooking meals) without being told that they should apologise for being cross or making an uncomplaining effort to sort it out which is true.

It's also true both that we know that he does cool family meals from scratch.

I'm not the husband, last time I checked I was quite a heavily pregnant woman. I'm just not myopic enough to think that the fact I'm in possession of a vagina means that I have a right to get pissy about things that I would expect those not in possession of that body part to simply suck up.