To think guests should use their own bathroom not the spare one on the landing!

[TigerPath]

3-bed house, DH and I have a bedroom with ensuite upstairs next to DS' room. There's another bathroom on the landing which I use to bath DS or if DH is in ours. Downstairs is an ensuite guestroom.

We've had loads of guests since we moved (popular seaside location) and much as I love having them I like my own space! The whole point of a downstairs ensuite guestroom is they should never need to come upstairs! Yet some of them come up to use the bathroom, which means I have to keep cleaning the bath and loo and I feel my space is being invaded.

Why can't they just use their own bathroom?? How do I tell them to use their own without seeming rude? It's a perfectly good bathroom with bath as well as shower, plenty of nice products, basket of spare toothbrushes, towels etc.

AIBU?

Yes, but there's a big difference between family over to stay and op's situation which, if I have understood correctly, is paying guests

...erm, actually I think I may have read op wrong...

Well, like me, they might think it logical that if a bathroom is empty, then it is sensible to use it. Presumably it is used when another person is in the en-suit one.

Pretty simple though - if you are close enough to the people staying to let them stay as guests in your house, then you are close enough to say - "please can you just use the en-suite and not the upstairs bathroom, I'm trying to cut down on cleaning"

The point I was trying to make though foo was that enjoys having people to stay doesn't mean not having boundaries. And your post sounded a bit smug

Enjoying not enjoys

"Don't use the bathroom upstairs because DH sleep walks and I hate for him to walk in on you when he's in the nude" - and remove the lock from the door.

becky. I think you have, but there is probably an in-between type of guest. The "oh we must come and stay" type, who never do, unless you live somewhere near something, that makes local accommodation expensive. We had quite a few of those type of people who always wanted to come and stay with us during the festival or at Hogmanay, when we lived in Edinburgh. One was a couple we met on holiday who claimed they'd love to stay in touch (we weren't that fussed) and never did until a year later, out of the blue, asked if they could come visit.

When they arrive you show them to their room and say, this is your bedroom and this is your bathroom, with towels for you to use, let me know if you need anything else that's not provided.
Make sure it's stocked with soap, shampoo, loo paper etc.

Becky. Didn't mean to sound smug. Not sure what I was smug about. If it's the number of bathrooms, I'd rather there were fewer. It's just that we needed a house with extra space for our daughter, and all the equipment she needs for her disability, and for her to be able to get about. This was the only one we found that suited - and it just happened to have more bathrooms than we could possibly need.

Ooh my mil used to always use our upstairs bathroom when we had a perfectly reasonable downstairs wc.

Since we moved she only uses the wc but think that's only because upstairs bathroom was ripped out for a month so she had no choice - she did try only to be greeted with the waste pipe sticking out of the floor 😂

foo erm, yes, thanks

Are you a B&B or someone having friends over?

What on earth is wrong with guests using both bathrooms?
You're a mad bunch of uptight people!!
Surely guests should just be made to feel welcome?!

Cross post. I thought the "But I love having having them to stay so they can use any shower they like" was a bit

Are they couples? Maybe they don't like the idea of pooing when their partner is in the next room

As op wasn't so generous when it's just that she would like to have a bit of space in her own home that's all

As if

You said about maybe they don't want to wake someone up, which is perfectly sensible IMO. Why would you walk through a bedroom where someone else is sleeping to use the toilet when you can go upstairs and use the one in a bathroom that opens straight of the landing so you're not bothering anyone? If my DH and I were staying somewhere like this this would be a massive problem as I go to bed a lot earlier than him and am a very light sleeper. How clean do you think your guests are expecting the bathroom to be? In your position I wouldn't invite friends to stay if I wasn't comfortable with them using the upstairs bathroom.

Me me me! This is my massive pet peeve.

I have stayed at lots of friends houses on weekends away and used the bathroom I was directed to, and never once asked or attempted to use anything else, even when it meant having to have a shallow cold bath and fight with a hose thingy not attached to the wall.

We have a three bed house, a loo on each floor (town house) so there should never be an "I need the loo" issue.

On the middle floor is a guest room and next to it a family bathroom beautifully kitted out that I always say is theirs to use exclusively whilst they're with us. Yet every bloody time, someone will come and ask to use our en suite!

Rude rude rude, you are NOT being unreasonable.

I agree with Pseudo.
You're way too bothered by this.
If this upsets you then don't invite people to stay!
Saying something is just plain rude.
Relax!!

Yep, with you practicing

becky. Tiny bit of background. I live about three hours from them, I don't get to see them often, so when they do come, it's pretty special. That's all I'm saying.

I like having people to stay, feed, water, entertain etc but at the end of the day it's still my home and anyone who actually takes "make yourself at home" to mean "take over my home for the length of your stay" can sodding well sod off to a sodding hotel. It's just bad manners

Wow. I'm glad I'm not a guest at your houses. I also have three bathrooms, two are en suite.
I don't give a monkeys which bathrooms my guests use.
The only thing I care about is that they feel welcome and have a good time!