to think that guests should receive a meal at a wedding

[Roversandrhodes]

Oh and I recently attended the wedding of good old friends of mine ,oh has met them a handful of times.
Wedding was at 12 and night guests arrived at 7.After the ceremony we were shown to a room for a 'mingle' whilst the wedding party had their photos.We were then taken to our assigned tables and sat down to a scone and jam.This was it ,all day.

Until about 9pm when a burger van arrived .

Aibu to think this was a little rude ?Some guests had travelled from Germany and Scotland to be there ,it was Friday so many guests inc myself and oh had taken time off work ,no kids were aloud so we (and many other guests had arranged childcare) ,we travelled an hour to get there ,brought a gift ,etc.I don't resent doing any of this ,I was happy to be invited but I just think it's a little unreasonable to expect guests to go from morning til 8pm on one scone each and a spoonful of jam.

Thoughts ?

DH would have left in high dudgeon about 4pm; he gets very Hangry!! Not someone to be around if not regularly fed.

We had a friends wedding some years ago where they had waiters going round with nice canapés... And that was it. No evening food other than that. And lots of alcohol. A bunch of us just had to leave about 9 to get a curry, having not eaten since before 12 and having had a number of glasses of champagne.../

The poor sods who had to stand through the ceremony then only got given a scone.

I'm a wedding photographer and I've seen quite a few of these 'afternoon tea' style receptions recently - the afternoon tea thing is definitely a new trend. I've overheard Guests complaining though!!

Wedding food is mostly inedible anyway so I don't think it's a big deal.

Before every wedding we something like a Hungry Horse and have a mahoosive breakfast. Makes the day more bearable.

I would have got pizza delivered through the nearest window and eaten it under the table. I bet the rest of the guests would be trying to get underneath there with me!!

Could have made a fortune auctioning off slices

I've never had afternoon tea which was one scone a few grapes and a pile of crisps

Wedding food is mostly inedible really? I feel sorry for you at your wedding experiences. As pp said, it's one of the best bits!

Lol thats a joke. Yanbu

Yes, it's true. Had some grim wedding food over the years.

Mostly because the food was cold, two weddings they simply didn't make enough food so people had to sit without a plate in front of them.

Grim.

Would rather go to a barbecue.

I did order pizza for my kids. Got filthy looks from the bride (my sister in law) but hey ho

Wow. Me and dp have been talking about getting married and making sure we have good and plentiful food and drink is our number 1 priority. I'd have sent out for a pizza.

'the afternoon tea thing is definitely a new trend. I've overheard Guests complaining though!!'

Bit cheeky of those guests, they could decline, as long as it was clear on the invitation that's what it was. What could be seen as cheeky is having such a wedding in an out of the way venue, requiring lots of travel/lodging from guests, tacky requests for money, dress codes, etc.

The ones I went to like that were local, no touting for money or pay for our honeymoon and were staged like this because the couple/family were teetotal due to religion.

I wouldn't mind the afternoon tea if say the ceremony was after lunch and it was an afternoon tea before earlyish evening meal. Nice fast food vans are also welcome, much better than some horrible 3 course silver service affair. Had some really poor cooking with those. Posh burger is much better.

You can't leave guests stranded for that length of time without food. If you really have to then at least tell them beforehand.

We went to a wedding with no proper food until the evening buffet at 9:30. The wedding started at 11.
There were canapés served at about 2:30, but only a couple of trays for about 40 people. By the time we realised there was no food until late the hotel had stopped serving lunch. I had to resort to giving my youngest DC (then 1 and 2) the fruit and cucumber from the copious amounts of Pimms that was served and crisps from the bar.
I later learned the wedding party had all had a room service lunch after the photographs.
I wouldn't have minded so much if we had been told first but there was no warning in the invitation or even on the day.

I've been to a wedding like this. I was aware however as I know the bride so knew the dets. We went for a big bowl of pasta after the ceremony. It makes it a long old day without a 3 Course meal to fill up a few hours.

YANBU.

We've been to two weddings where they didn't feed guests much. The first I was pissed because nothing was said. It was 9pm by the time some food was served and then it was only one bacon bap each. We'd had nothing since lunch time and if we'd have known we could have nipped out to grab food because it was in a city where there was plenty of stuff! We weren't staying overnight as we were local, so we could have also made sure we had a big breakfast.

The second we were warned beforehand that there would only be a hog roast and a bit of salad, so make sure we ate before we got there. As we were staying in that hotel, we decided to take something with us if we or DD1 got peckish. It turned out there was more than we thought there would be and then a chocolate fountain with lots of extras afterwards, so we didn't need the extras (perfect for the drive back home). More than happy though to have the extras, though, since we were warned well in advance (before the invites were sent out).

I don't see a problem with not providing much food until later, but give the guests a heads up so they're prepared. That's common sense, right? Seems like maybe not!

I went to a wedding where only cup cakes were to be served; wedding ceremony at 11 am and followed by " party".
No music was provided and the people who's venue was hired realised this and kindly streamed MTV on a massive screen.
A distant relative of the bride was so shocked at hearing there was not going to be a buffet, generously provided vast platters of delicious sandwiches and other savouries to feed the starving masses.
It was bizzare as the brides dress cost about £3K!

I still remember a wedding without food about 30 years later. (BTW they split up fairly quickly)

absolutely out of order and very inhospitable.

Afternoon tea is a wildly generous description for a scone and a few grapes! It's usually several types of mini sandwiches, scones with clotted cream, then mini desserts. I've always been stuffed after a proper afternoon tea.

Before we attended [the many many] weddings of our friends we always consumed a 'tactical cheeseburger' from McDonalds. Always found one en route to church/ceremony. Staves off the starvation when you have to stand around for hours with one warm complimentary glass of booze whilst 79 trillion photographs are taken.

As to the single scone in a 'lunchbox' [which had unrealised aspirations of grapes and crisps ] it make me roar with laughter. how rude and how incongruous to the importance of the day. It makes me laugh out loud so hopefully in time you'll chuckle too.

(tactical cheeseburgers are also useful at the beginning of a boozy night out)

I think some people live in a bubble . Zero awareness of the needs of others.

There was absolutely nothing on the invite with regards to food.It didn't cross my mind much beforehand ,just thought that there'd be something that would be adequate wether it be a buffet at lunch time,afternoon tea or a 3 course hot meal.I probably wouldn't have asked the bride even if I did have doubts as If it was my wedding and someone asked me about food I'd think it a little odd as like so many of you have said ,food is a massive part of s wedding or any celebration in my eyes so of course there would be something substantial.I don't know if my post sent before but they are definitely not on the bread line ,bride has an almost 1k wedding dress ,5 bridesmaids plus Paige boys and flower girls.There were 2 hen do's one was abroad ,which I went too and another local one which I also attended.They went to New York 3 days after for their honeymoon,the bride had professional photographer ,makeup artist ,hair stylist etc -all the usual what you would expect.The venue was quite nice ,not tacky at all but not right for a wedding imo.Like I mentioned earlier ,there wasn't enough space for guests during the ceremony and everyone was split up to eat their scone.The bar wasn't even a proper bar really and all drinks were warm.The venue has just started taking bookings however so I don't know,perhaps they got it cheap?The Fotb did state in his speech that the wedding was done on a budget which I found a bit strange for him to mention in his speech but maybe he felt bad about the scone situation .

Your post made me lol!dont worry ,myself and oh are still laughing at the 'scone' now but I still can't quite believe it .