to think that guests should receive a meal at a wedding

[Roversandrhodes]

Oh and I recently attended the wedding of good old friends of mine ,oh has met them a handful of times.
Wedding was at 12 and night guests arrived at 7.After the ceremony we were shown to a room for a 'mingle' whilst the wedding party had their photos.We were then taken to our assigned tables and sat down to a scone and jam.This was it ,all day.

Until about 9pm when a burger van arrived .

Aibu to think this was a little rude ?Some guests had travelled from Germany and Scotland to be there ,it was Friday so many guests inc myself and oh had taken time off work ,no kids were aloud so we (and many other guests had arranged childcare) ,we travelled an hour to get there ,brought a gift ,etc.I don't resent doing any of this ,I was happy to be invited but I just think it's a little unreasonable to expect guests to go from morning til 8pm on one scone each and a spoonful of jam.

Thoughts ?

[EatsShitAndLeaves]

YANBU

DH and I would have probably left to find a local restaurant and not come back. It's incredibly rude.

It's just another example of all sense evaporating when it comes to a wedding.

I wonder how far we are off now getting invitations that read

"come to my wedding!! Cost £300 per head paid 12 months in advance to allow us to book and pay for the venue, plus an additional £200 pp honeymoon surcharge to allow us to book our honeymoon in Maui payable immediately via online banking. Dress code details are to be found on the reverse, only clothing from these retailers in x or y colours are allowed or entry will be refused. Please note the cost of the tickets do not include transport, accommodation or clothing. Our wedding list is with Harvey Nichols and you can show your appreciation at being invited to the wedding of a lifetime by selecting a present specifcally from the items listed from a value of between £1000 and £10,000. Gifts not on this list will be sold on ebay to fund the carefully selected designer items we have curated on the list that reflect our values and superior design asthetics and we will not be providing a thank you note for sucj offerings. Tickets are not transferable or refundable."

[MrsF1]

MrF would've gone off to find 'real food' as a scone would never have satisfied him until mid-evening!! After him abandoning me at previous weddings, I got wise and stashed biscuits in my handbag. When we tied the knot, we got married a distance from home and made sure guests had tea and coffee on arrival. After the lunchtime ceremony when we nipped off for photos, they had canapes to fill a corner. Early afternoon was a 4-course dinner. Then we fed them all again with a substantial buffet at the early evening 'do'. There wasn't a scrap left, but then we do have friends who can eat their own body weight daily!!

[Buckinbronco]

Bloody hell, a scone all day? For 9 hours? That's a joke. What rubbish hosts.

I am starting to hate the crappy weddings I am going to recently. Ones where the B&G get married late so they can get away with giving all their guests a buffet - or you wait around until the inflight pry fish & chip/ burger ban arrives- or they some stingy afternoon tea. Makes it a crap day (yes I like my food)

[Roversandrhodes]

The worst thing was that I didn't even eat the scone because it was really dry and I'm allergic to jam ,also I had assumed that there would be other food to follow .I just thought it was an odd choice of a starter and I would wait for the main course.That will teach me for assuming!

[ScreenshottingIsNotJournalism]

YANBU at all

I do like a nice old fashioned wedding with light bites afterwards then everyone goes home. But if people are staying all day you feed them!

I mean.. doesn't even have to be a wedding, if someone visted your home for a whole day & evening you'ld provide them with 2 meals!

[lalalalyra]

I think it's rude to invite people to an all day event and not feed them, or at the very, very, very least not let them know there is going to be no food.

I mean, it doesn't have to be expensive. We went to a wedding recently where the couple organised a buffet in the community centre. It cost £8 a head, they invited the number of people they could afford and everyone had a ball.

[whatevva]

I think I would have been gone by 9pm

[BackforGood]

Like any "do" - if it goes over a standard meal time, then you should expect to offer your guests that meal.
So scones / cakes / afternoon tea is fine for a wedding at 2 which all peters out early evening, but the fact the ceremony was at 12 and then went into the evening means everyone missed 2 meals, so that's what the hosts should be providing.

If there is going to be any variation from that, then it should be made very clear to guests when the invitation goes out, so they can choose to either decline, bring their own picnic, or leave the venue for a meal elsewhere, part way through.

[Wordsmith]

We travelled 250 miles years back to attend a colleague's wedding, including staying over the night before and after. Food was provided but it was HOURS after the ceremony and everyone was pissed by then. It was so late the evening reception guests were arriving while we were eating. I think the photographer just spent ages getting the pics done. I nearly went to the nearest chippy.

[frieda909]

YABU to make me want a scone.

YANBU to expect to be fed at a wedding!

[BaskingTrout]

this is why I always take an emergency sandwich to weddings, DH thought I was very odd when we first got together and attended weddings as a couple. he has now seen the light.

very rude of bride and groom not to provide adequate food. you wouldn't have people round to your house for that length of time and not offer them something proper to eat, why on earth would you do it when people have taken the day off work, travelled and bought you a present unless you're being very tightfisted

if people were drinking on very empty stomachs as well, that's surely a recipe for disaster.

[ScreenshottingIsNotJournalism]

OP I don't believe for a second that nobody splinter-grouped off the nearest McDonalds.

So YABalittleU for missing the signs of a splintergroup and getting in on it

Also, if you weren't eating all day, what WERE you expected to do all day? after you've "mingled" everyone and now know how they all know the couple that is..

[Roversandrhodes]

Emergency sandwich made me lol!I will have to remember that for the wedding I'm going to next month ,I'm not having a repeat of sconegate .

[LineyReborn]

Presumably the guests were meant to go off and entertain / feed themselves. You didn't all just sit there for six hours, did you?

[RaeSkywalker]

My Dad runs corporate events for a living and always says #1 priority is food, as it shapes people's memories of the day.

I realised how true this was when we went to a wedding last year and the food was very minimal (not as bad as a solitary scone, but I was ravenous and I've got a very small appetite). My whole memory of that day- the wedding of a close friend- was how utterly utterly miserable I felt being so hungry, to the point where I felt unwell, stuck in the middle of nowhere so we couldn't even sneak off to a corner shop for a Twix. Then the flipping evening buffet came out and there was no vegetarian option, despite 4 of the bride's friends being veggie and being asked to specify dietary requirements on our RSVPs. I very nearly cried.

We got a taxi home at midnight and I demolished a massive bowl of cereal before bed!

[Roversandrhodes]

People were very ,very drunk!and at about 6pm.Especially my gf friend who didn't even get her scone.I can't remember much past 7.30 but don't think I embarrassed myself too much thankfully .Not as embarrassed as if be if I'd fed my wedding guests a scone anyway .

[MeMySonAndl]

We all in the office were invited to a colleague's wedding. All of us.

The invitation read something like:

We are merging households so don't want any gifts but we would be grateful if you send your donations to (account number) as we would like to get married in Santorini.

We will throw a big party on our return to celebrate with everyone, please make sure you let us know what are you bringing to ensure we don't have too many of the same thing.

One month before the wedding she sent us all a reminder that donations were still welcome and that she needed to know which food we would be bringing before she went away to get married.

I believe no one donated a penny and I never heard anything back about the party so I suppose it was suspended.

[MiddleClassProblem]

I'm guessing there were no kids at this wedding op?

[Roversandrhodes]

Unfortunately I think that's what they expected us to do.There was no music either and the drinks were all warm and expensive .I feel bad slating my friends wedding but that's how it was.

[ExitPursuedByABear]

Was there alcohol?

[Roversandrhodes]

There were about 6,child of b&g and a few Paige boys and flower girls plus one or two I noticed throughout the day.Our daughter wasn't invited,I'm glad .

[MrsJayy]

I would have left a scone and a 7quid burger bugger that I would have been starving you invite people all day you feed them there is no excuse for a scone on frigging jam

[ExitPursuedByABear]

x post

[Roversandrhodes]

Yes but it was warm and I mean warm.

[MrsJayy]

Oh I would have probably been pissed too sounds a dreary wedding