AIBU to put 3 year old with 5 year old in child-contract taxi to nursery as one off and...

[Bluejay100]

Was nursery right to report me to Health Visitor for doing this, without informing me? I know it was maybe not ideal but my ex husband declined to take them at last minute as he was annoyed I've claimed for child maintenance, and it's an hour commute to my work via that nursery. I also work in a vital healthcare role and need to be in at 8. So not ideal, but is it a child protection issue?? I'm fuming at them.

ahem

"probably" your fault AF

There's a business opportunity in the making AF

"LTB and travel with Any Fucker school transport service"

I'm glad you understand it's unhealthy McGill and posting that you know of children who have been abused in this situation is pointless.

Children have been abused by nursery workers by childminders by teachers by police officers by social workers by pretty much someone in any profession you can think of, some ones job does not tend to make them more or less likely to abuse a child but their is a strong argument for authoritive positions like (teachers and what not)working with children can be quite attractive to abusers,a taxi driver would be unlikely to fit into that bracket.

Children are far more frequently abused in their own home by their own parents than anybody else.

And it's not just my county that tends not to use escorts without medical/disability related need it's every one that boarders it as well.
The LA budgets have pretty much been slashed it hard enough to get them to fund the bloody taxi let alone chucking in yet another person at NMW who incidentally has no more training and no more checks than the driver does.
Whilst in an ideal world nobody at all would lone work with kids but it's quite normal in many settings and not lone working is also just a false thing that gives the illusion of security that can be just as unfounded as any other type of working

With no escort ?
I'd be reporting you to social services
They could undo their belt , try to open doors , fight
Seriously on what level did you think this was ok ?

MrsMainwaring, on what level is it not OK for children to be driven by their relatives and family friends without an escort? Such children could also undo seatbelts, try to open the doors and fight. However, I suspect that child contracted taxis have childproof locks on the doors and seatbelts that can't be undone by small children, and if they're belted in they can't really fight.

I meant to say, was abused with an escort present ( she was in her teens and not vulnerable so I think our CC had different rules to either CCs)
So I don't feel it makes any difference with regards to safety.

I was trying to understand what prompted the nursery to contact the health visitor and if any rules were broken by the taxi driver OP used. If not then she has done nothing wrong.

And yes, anyone can abuse children, no matter what professional position they are in. I am in no way saying taxi drivers are any more likely to abuse children than a teacher, solicitor or family member.

I suppose the difference is that if I'm driving my children anywhere then I expect to have to control their behaviour and tell them off if they act up. I don't expect or even want a taxi driver to have to do this. They aren't teachers or nannies or childminders. They drive cars for a living.

I wouldn't put a 3 and 5 year old in a taxi and I particularly wouldn't do it if the 3 year old wasn't a contracted user of this service. That doesn't make me perfect or not understand that other parents may have to do this through circumstances.

In any case the op is probably on a wind up and this never happened.

Perhaps what prompted the HV contact was much the same as what prompted the pages and pages of posts from people on this thread.

Nursery workers are normal people just like the posters on here are.

Or perhaps it down to the often thought attitude that a gov agency can do something and that's ok but if a none gov employee does the same it's horrifying
Or perhaps there is an assumption that the op has used a unlicensed minicab or what ever it is that large areas have problems with

In any case the op is probably on a wind up and this never happened

Why? It happens with thousands of children all around the UK twice daily.
It's far more likely that the op got scared off due to the outraged responses and people telling her she was dreadful

Are both children yours? How come the five year old is entitled to a council funded taxi when you're dropping the three year old off anyway?
Or are the school and nursery on different sites entirely, and you actually hijacked the taxi for an extra journey??
So many questions; but you're not going to answer any of them, are you?

For real? YABU!

So what if you have a vital healthcare job and need to be there at a certain time. Children on 3 and 5 can't just be put in a taxi with no escort. Were they supposed to just hop out on the street and walk into the nursery by themselves too?

They were 100% right to report it as a concern and I'm surprised you just had HV follow up and not a social worker visit.

If the issue is your exH changing plans at the last minute then you just have to find a way to sort t between you

I suppose the difference is that if I'm driving my children anywhere then I expect to have to control their behaviour and tell them off if they act up. I don't expect or even want a taxi driver to have to do this. They aren't teachers or nannies or childminders. They drive cars for a living.

But contracted taxi drivers who routinely drive small children without escorts must be expected to control their behaviour if necessary, surely?

BettyBi0, RTFT. Plenty of people have confirmed that children of 3 and 5 are regularly and lawfully put in taxis with no escort. As for "Were they supposed to just hop out on the street and walk into the nursery by themselves too?": the 5 year old was contracted to go in the taxi, so there will be a standard arrangement in place for the driver to deliver to the door anyway.

Circumstances where a 5yo may have a taxi but not a 2yo from the same family

5yo in compulsory schooling 2yo in attached nursery
5yo with disability or SEN 2yo without.

I'm not sure but I don't think distance criteria applied to under 5's either so that would be another one

Dh used to taxi-drive children to nursery and school. The difference was that the nurseries and schools knew this was the arrangement.

Bad judgement in a stressful situation.

But the op won't be back.

Looking after your children is the most vital health care role, I'd have reported to ss tbh. Do people really lack judgement like this?
Your children's needs should come before any job, I find these stories weird tbh.

I do too NewLife but I put it down to my age (50's).

Don't be ridiculous NewLife - having a job enables you to fulfil your child's needs.

Although I think this one is weird for other reasons.

LittleNelle

Of course it does, but looking after the welfare of your children comes first, or at least should come first.
It depends where your priorities lie, I suppose.
OP, should have back up arrangements or have gone into work late as a once off.

There's nothing in the OP's posts that suggests the children were at risk or came to any harm though.

For fuck's sake. All this hand wringing that two young children went to school in a taxi.. back in the real world this is a regular occurrence. Are the parents of children with special needs who travel to school in a taxi stupid? Do their children deserve more? Of course not, that is seen as acceptable but not for the OP's children as a one off? Tell me the difference from a safety perspective.

There might be an issue with insurance or whatever but that is not the HV's concern.

My dad was a taxi driver and he always took special needs children to school. He was just a 'normal' taxi driver but he still took them into reception. He had to.

Of course OP wouldn't come back, who the fuck would come back to pages of posts telling her she was neglecting her children's safety by putting them in a taxi when millions of children daily do the same.

Dh used to taxi-drive children to nursery and school. The difference was that the nurseries and schools knew this was the arrangement

Them knowing make little to no difference, it is not the role of a nursery to sanction or grant permission for drop off's.
As long as the driver handed the child to a member of the nursery staff it makes not a jot of difference if that staff member knew in advance or not, it does make a difference on collections (obviously) but not when taking the child there.

Would it be normal to notify them of granny/Aunty/uncle/trusted friend or neighbour was dropping OFF the child where parent was doing collection is it a safeguarding issue I you don't, course it's not

Op has probably been scared off by the outrage at the beginning or is working.

Understandable that nursery reported it, they have to report concerns but in my opinion what op did was fine.

Yes, what about all those special needs children we see every morning in the bus thing - the driver picks them up. What about my children aged 5 on the Haberdashers school coach? What about any of us driving our children without a second adult in the car which we do every day of the year many of us?

This is just the kind of ridiculous nanny state interference we need to get rid of in the UK. Parents have different views on things and we need to tolerate those differences. I coudl equally say all the namby pamby over protective parenst are doing a massive lot of damage to their children through that and call social serviecs on them. We need to live and let live unless someone is branding their child with an iron or something.