AIBU to object to teenage drinking encouraged by other mums?

[captainfarrell]

My DD is under 16. We don't give her alcohol. To our knowledge she doesn't drink elsewhere. This last year her friends have had birthday 'gatherings' at home till about 10pm, parents are home and some girls sleep over. It has come to my attention via a couple of rogue FB pics and from another mum that alcohol has been at these parties. My DD says she hasn't had any but that others have smuggled it in however on a couple of occasions a couple of the mums bought it for the party.Most of the girls are 14 about to turn 15. I am shocked that they encourage this.Lots of teens experiment but supplying it seems a whole other ball game to me. AIBU?

[Ricardian]

A bit like the very proud parents who think they control their teens social media.

The Dunning-Kruger effect.

[BlueberrySky]

I have allowed and bought beer for my DS's get togethers, only up to 15 there so not a party, since he was 15. They would usually all turn up with booze. I also understood that they did the same at other houses. I never checked with their parents and they never checked with me, but from conversations with a few, providing them with beer was general practice. I used to make sure there was plenty to eat and keep a discreet eye on them. Now they are all 18 they tend to go to pubs more.

With DD (14) she will have the odd glass of wine with supper. She goes to parties and has small gatherings at home. She has never asked for alcohol at them and I understand she does not have it at her friends houses. I do know her friends parents more than DS's, so I may well ask them when she asks to have alcoholic drinks with her friends.

I think with teenagers you do have to trust them and if you do not want them to drink, let them know. It is not up to other kids parents to parent your teens.