To be annoyed by "I need a favour but have to ask you face to face"

[Eastie77]

I think IABU but anyway...it's annoying me.

A relative sent me a text message stating she needs to pop round and ask me for a favour. It has to be this week and she asked when I'm free. I have a really busy week with various bits and bobs arranged for the kids, appointments etc. I replied the only times that are convenient would be this evening or early Saturday morning before we leave on a weekend break with the kids. I asked if she could give me a call to discuss the favour. She just replied "Ok see you Saturday". I asked again re. the call and she said no, she has to ask me face to face.

I hate this cloak and dagger shit. Just tell me what you need! If it's something awkward I'd rather she asked over the phone tbh. She lives about 40mins away on the bus (doesn't drive) and I mentioned we will be leaving early on Saturday and she'll have to get up early to get here. As this didn't dissuade her I'm guessing it's something important but what and why can't she ask over the phone?? I am not close to this relative btw.

I will feel bad if it's something 'serious' but at the moment I'm just pissed off as we will be sitting around waiting for her to get here on Saturday before we have to set off on a longish drive.

Anyway. Rant over.

Sorry contessa it means little town of the fishes, or fortlet/little fortress of the fishes. It a walled town. Don't know where the bridge came from!

I did wonder about that as a child AhHaaaa..... one of my mum's pearls of wisdom, so I shouldn't be surprised that it's wrong

Come back and let us know when / if you get the permit back OP.

What's happened?..I need an ending to this.. it's like the beginning of a novel.

OP what did you do? Is she still coming on Sat?

Sorry - found the answer on P31

Equinox! I have spent literally hours of my life in there while DS examines all the hippy dippy stuff.
The little chippy overlooking the sea is great for old fashioned milky coffee. Fantastic view

IS THE PASS BACK?

Did you get your permit back yet?

You may have to register one as lost :( brass neck of some people!

Just read this. God this woman would grip my shit!
hope you get your pass back.
Tenby is awesome....bit biased being a Welshie x

She returned the pass! But several days later than agreed and rather than just putting it through the letterbox as agreed she knocked on the door. A crying DS outed us so we couldn't pretend not to be home.

I noticed all 3 spaces had been used (although she told me the friend only needed it for one day to attend the property conference - which I no longer think actually took place) and two different car registration details were on the Permit so God knows who else she gave it to! I didn't ask any questions and just took it back.

Unfortunately she raised the request again re. buying an empty permit from me for her friend as she knows I'll be getting 3 new ones next month with 10x spaces. You were all right, I should never have told her about the renewal process etc!!

As mentioned before, I genuinely had not realised until now that she is very passive - even as I explained I cannot sell the pass she talked over me. I suggested the friend parks at Yvonne's and takes the tube into central London when she has appointments here. There then followed a drip feed as now the friend apparently has mobility problems which means "the tube is difficult for her if a lift isn't available in the station, and the Central line stations have so many staircases and Eastie you're so lucky you are able bodied, you have no idea what it's like to struggle on public transport.."

So if the friend really has these issues I'd give her the permit but on an 'as needs' basis and I'm not just handing out an empty pass. But I'm not sure Yvonne is being truthful. DP, who is deeply suspicious of everyone and everything, thinks she is running a racket and planning to charge people for the space!

We had a lovely time in Tenby btw. Really liked Saundersfoot as well and we will def. go back!

dizzybintess - 'grip my shit'

by Gosh she's a giant PITA

Ohh Hun. I am disabled too. her ''friend' has options that do not involve you or your Car pass

Don't be sucked in by the mobility argument OP! I'm not being harsh, but this is really not your problem, and it's 99% likely to be a load of bullshit.

Oh she is hilarious.

I bet you've not heard the end of this.

Thanks for the update, glad you had a good holiday

I'm with your DH!

Glad you enjoyed Tenby

If she pushes it, ask how come the permit was used three times instead of one, and by two different cars.

Entitled much! She's disabled, she can apply for a congestion zone pass. Yes it's shit (I know as I'm a wheelchair user) but I would never dream of asking someone like this.

Just send a text saying no to the pass, especially as you agreed to one use and 3 were used by different cars without your permission and you don't want to lose all 3 passes for fraud and you might have an emergency end of the year in which you require all the pass spaces.

I agree - you can't give in to her passive aggressive badgering.

Good luck

Do not give her the pass - she is clearly misusing it. Just say no, don't go into any explanations or reasons because it's not up for discussion.

As MNetters are fond of saying 'No' is a complete sentence.

Don't give out the pass and be VERY firm with this woman from now on. She sounds awful.

AlwaysNC - thank you, I had no idea such Congestion charge exemptions existed. I have just looked it up. I suspect the friend will not qualify as I don't think she is registered disabled (if the mobility thing is even true) - Yvonne just mentioned a vaguely defined 'mobility problem' - so she won't have a blue badge. Still, not my problem.

I do think access on the underground for wheelchair users should be drastically improved and I'm embarrassed to say I didn't even notice this until I had children and needed to navigate trains/tubes with a buggy. I generally avoided the underground in DD's first year, too stressful.

Don't give it her again! Did you ask her about the other car numberplates?