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Original poster

I think my husband's drinking is getting out of hand...

234 replies

LovelyBath · 06/04/2016 13:31

He drank three bottles of red wine last night. I noticed the amount, as in the last month or two I have stopped drinking at all.

I think it is too much. He went to the shop late in the evening to get the third bottle. This concerns me.

If he his, what can I do? It is his responsibility, not mine. But I don't want him to make himself ill. He doesn't do this every night by the way. Mainly at the weekends.

OP posts:
Original poster
LovelyBath · 06/04/2016 17:49

Bucking they might do (GP) They basically called my friend told her she needed to stop smoking and the support they could give and the complications it would cause with her MS...they are a small practice with just one GP who is quite formidable and knows all her patients pretty well...

OP posts:
Marynary · 06/04/2016 17:51

LovelyBath If they are doing regular blood tests then they are testing liver function. The manufacturer specifies that these should be done at least every two to three months.

Original poster
LovelyBath · 06/04/2016 17:52

Little he probably wouldn't drink then. It is very much a end of the week / holiday thing. So yesterday, he had some work finished and we are off on Easter break so no school run etc. He works at home.

he doesn't hide bottles, or have any on the mornings, or every day. It is more the amount he seems to need to drink.

I stopped after Christmas cos I was starting to join in though not to such extremes and also I am on a med which you aren't meant to drink with.

Thanks for sharing.

OP posts:
Original poster
LovelyBath · 06/04/2016 17:55

Mary thanks. So if they haven't then they will now after my letter, od if they have they will be able to check them and see how they look. And if any are not good she will hopefully chase him up about it if not now, at the next appt. She is good at following up stuff.

OP posts:
Marynary · 06/04/2016 17:58

To be honest, I'd love it if he didn't have to take the methotrexate. It is as mentioned a strong med and I feel it is cheaper than Humira (which had to get funding for) and I don't feel the side effects are being taken as seriously as it should be.

Humira can effect liver function too .

cozietoesie · 06/04/2016 18:01

If he's not dependent in some way then he should be able to just stop?

ImperialBlether · 06/04/2016 18:02

Just a note to the poster called ohh - your husband's drinking more now. A litre of Bacardi is 40 units. A litre of red wine is 12 units - 3/4 of that is a 75 cl bottle, which would be 9 units. If he's drinking 9 units a night, that's 42 units per week.

LittleLionMansMummy · 06/04/2016 18:05

Yes but it's a short leap from 'only at weekends' to 'only when it's the school holidays' to 'only when there's a y in the day'. Alcohol abuse is not about hiding it and all those tales of traditional alcoholism, it's about an inability to control it. Three bottles is definitely a lack of control and if he's not flat on his back that would also suggest he's built up am impressive level of tolerance to it. At the moment it's only a problem once a week, but if he's not careful it spiral and dominate him. I am also the daughter of a 'functioning' alcoholic so know that its abuse comes in many shapes and sizes. Someone doesn't have to be drinking vodka upon waking, stumbling around blind drunk and hiding bottles everywhere for it to be a concern. The fact that you've posted here implies it is very much a concern.

KeepingitReal2 · 06/04/2016 18:07

Sorry I meant LFTs or liver function tests in sorry I'm in ophthalmology so not totally au fait but we do have a few patients who take MTX for eye related issues

HoundoftheBaskervilles · 06/04/2016 18:20

Nine units a night is 63 units a week Imperial, far more.

Marynary · 06/04/2016 18:21

So if they haven't then they will now after my letter, od if they have they will be able to check them and see how they look.

As I said, they will have been doing it anyway if they have been doing blood tests.

HoundoftheBaskervilles · 06/04/2016 18:22

(And that poster said a 13% wine, so more like 70 units really).

Isetan · 06/04/2016 18:44

You missed the wait and see approach exit, your H is killing himself slowly and you have no idea how far along he is in the process. You need to be direct about your concerns and when your concerns are inevitably met with denials, insist on a liver function test.

I hope it isn't too late.

Marynary · 06/04/2016 18:54

Isetan Firstly they will already be doing liver function tests as the DH is on methotrexate. Secondly, OP can't "insist" that any tests are done on her DH. The test are between her DH and GP.Hmm It's his body.

LineyReborn · 06/04/2016 19:01

Yes, the GP can only really check that all tests are up to date. But that would be something.

cozietoesie · 06/04/2016 19:56

Unless the OP's DH is being completely accurate about his alcohol intake - which seems unlikely - then surely the results of any liver function test would be skewed?

cozietoesie · 06/04/2016 19:58

Sorry - that was meant to relate to any liver function test to determine the effects of methotrexate.

ImperialBlether · 06/04/2016 20:09

Hounds, I have no idea how I came to that figure! My maths is normally okay!

Marynary · 06/04/2016 20:13

Unless the OP's DH is being completely accurate about his alcohol intake - which seems unlikely - then surely the results of any liver function test would be skewed?

What do you mean?

HoundoftheBaskervilles · 06/04/2016 20:14

Happens to the best of us Imperial!

Marynary · 06/04/2016 20:16

Sorry - that was meant to relate to any liver function test to determine the effects of methotrexate.

I'm not sure what you mean. If the liver function tests suggest the liver is being damaged they will stop the methotrexate and continue to monitor liver function to see if liver enzymes return to within the normal range.

cozietoesie · 06/04/2016 20:19

It's straightforward to my mind, Mary. If I'm testing someone's liver function following administration of a certain drug then the test is capable of misinterpretation if I'm not in full possession of all the facts which might influence it. Surely?

Marynary · 06/04/2016 20:46

It's straightforward to my mind, Mary. If I'm testing someone's liver function following administration of a certain drug then the test is capable of misinterpretation if I'm not in full possession of all the facts which might influence it. Surely?

If the liver function tests are abnormal the interpretation would be that the liver is being damaged by something which would a correct interpretation They would stop the methotrexate and see if the enzymes returned to normal.

cozietoesie · 06/04/2016 20:58

And that's true. Smile It does rather assume that the tests are being carried out rigorously though?

I don't have quite the same faith in GPs or their practices that you do, I'm afraid. In my time, I've come across good ones and indifferent ones, ones who seem to have plenty of time for your case and ones who seem to have one eye on the timing per patient they're allowed by 'the rules'. I've seen GPs who could easily - for a variety of reasons - have the wool pulled over their eyes. I have huge respect for their job but I don't see them as infallible.

In addition, I have never yet met a GP who thought that the current general practice system was perfect.

Would you agree that the OP's husband should not be drinking as he does while taking methotrexate?

Original poster
LovelyBath · 06/04/2016 20:59

Ok. The note with the NHS stuff was a huge mistake and backfired badly.

The children are away on a sleepover with relatives and we were meant to be having a peaceful evening. Made a nice meal, watched a film...

then just had an angry rant at me, how horrible it was for him to come home to such a nasty note etc, underlining stuff...that it wasn't 3 bottles but 1 and a half. I tried to say it is because I care but no, it is apparently because I have MH problems and am being nasty and cruel.

I'm in bits, it fact I might well think of leaving if it wasn't for the children, who adore him.

God knows what he'll do if he finds out I've mentioned it to the GP. What on Earth was I thinking of?

OP posts: