Aibu to have handed my dd over to my dh and refused to deal with things for a while

[Sothisishowitfeels]

I have posted God knows how many posts on here about my youngest Dd (5 months) I just can't deal with it anymore, she is such incredibly hard work she screams for hours on end she comes out in random rashes, she has excema she, is terrible to feed, she wakes regularly at night. She has been in hospital twice already with chest infections, she is constantly snotty and dribbling to the extreme and has been since birth. She scratches herself constanly if you allow her access to her body - she has a bleeding cut on her leg which she did with her own finger despite me cutting her nails down as far as I physically can.

She cuts herself and bleeds so easily - today she had a bleeding cut on her chin which she got from a rusk ffs.

She has non blanching spots which I'm told are petichae but no one is told me why she gets these on her legs.

I have asked our go about these issues but because I have pnd (which frankly isn't surprising) he just asks me how I am sleeping etc.

This is not my first rodeo - she is my 6th child but I just can't take it anymore she screamed for hours on end today. today I have told him that I need him to do something . He works long hours, I know that I am probably asking the impossible but I am too tired to care.

I blurted it all out to him, showed him photos of our day which were various rashes, screaming and cuts and he has said he is calling the gp tomorrow to find out wtf is going on and tell them it's pretty much not in my head which is what I'm sure they believe it is.

He has sat her with me while she screamed for hours solid he knows that she is to say the least difficult.

Was I being unreasonable . I have literally left him holding the baby, he is going to have to take time off work to go to he gp for something that is potentially on my head.

I could have written your OP, turned out my DS had multiple allergies - dairy, nuts, eggs, soy and wheat.

We had the eczema, the scratching until raw, no sleep, crying consistently - you did right taking a break from it. The rash looks like eczema. We also had the chest infections - which ended up related to seasonal allergies and rhinitis.

This is what helped us:
Consultant allergist referral with allergy testing.
Stopped breastfeeding and moved onto Neocate formula.
Ranitidine for reflux
Washing clothes / bedding with method laundry liquid.
100% cotton clothing
scratch sleeves [https://www.scratchsleeves.co.uk] - really helped!
Eczema treatment - dermol 600 bath, oilatum bath, hydrocortisone cream, eumovate cream when bad, antibiotics when infected. Epiderm to coat 4 times a day.
Chest infections - sabutamol and ventaline inhalers as soon as cold starts. fluticasone nasal inhaler for rhinitis.

It took us a lot of time and heartache to find out what was going on, a few conditions where interacting. I'm not saying your DD has the same issues as my DS but some of the treatments may help, or at least give you a lead on what is going on. Push for an allergist consultant for definite.

I have to wash new clothes too as thy can cause me to rash and do extra rinses after washing to remove all traces of powder

I was just about to recommend scratchsleeves but I see May09 has beaten me to it!

Both mine had/have reflux/asthma/allergies etc. That looks like hives to me - I get that too and quite often I have no idea what's triggered it, first I know is that my torso is incredibly itchy and then when I undress it's red and blotchy. DC2 had CMPA too which manifested as hives. TBH it's impossible to tell what's e cause and what's the symptom sometimes - DC2 also had tongue tie, so although he had the same symptoms as your DD, I couldn't tell you whether it was the tongue tie, the reflux, the CMPA, the chest infections etc... Though I have just remembered that the CMPA was triggered by antibiotics for his first serious chest infection at around 14 weeks.

Weleda do a fantastic cream for babies (sensitive skin camomile cream) - seems to work at least as well as any of the various steroids, I still use it on the DC. Aveeno cream is also really good - you can get body cream, body lotion, face cream... The body cream seems best. The DC get it on prescription, though it's not horrifically expensive OTC if you'd have to fight.

Really hope you get answers soon - for both your sakes.

My son had loads of allergies when a baby. Change her milk now, you can buy a powdered soya or even a goats milk from health food shop. I got soya milk for both daughter and son on prescription. A cranial osteopath can work miracles for crying babies. Was her birth induced ? Sometimes this can really upset the 'balance' of a little one. I was taught to wet wrap his limbs when the scratching was at its worst but to get someone to listen to me I had to visit the GP and really lay it on the line, none of this british stiff upper lip stuff !

I used to look at his red, shiny, itchy, bleeding skin and never believe it would get better .... it did :)

Sothisishowitfeels I have only read the 1st page so not sure if anyone else has mentioned this but.. you say your daughter is on SMA milk? I read an article the other day about a baby constantly crying, in pain, upset, etc.. poor mum was going out of her mind with worry and Dr didn't seem to have any answers but anyway (very long story short) apparently some ingredients of SMA have been changed and this change has caused these symptoms and affected a lot of other babies too!
Might be worth looking into.. in the meantime for you and I hope you get some answers soon.

happyhearts7 have just found the link you are talking about www.change.org/p/nestle-ban-sma-pro-formula-milk?recruiter=84806898&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink

not sure if it has any basis but might be worth trying a change in milk to see if it makes a difference.

Thank you Noodledoodledoo yes, that's it I couldn't even remember where I'd seen it I'd read it and not passed much remarks until now (I last bought baby milk nearly 8 years ago).
Might not be the answer as you say but maybe worth looking into.. as mums and dads we'd try anything to soothe a crying baby

Just as an aside, DS is allergic to all fabric detergents except for Surcare. The whole family have to have everything in it or he rashes from traces in the machine. Ecover and Fairy are no good. Well worth trying - they occasionally have it on 1/3 off and when they do, we buy 40 or so at once as we get through so much - with a large family if you find a brand that works, then I would do the same.

Agree you need to push for full allergy testing - she and you both deserve a damn sight better.

for you.

Ok dh is in the doctors with her. Of course this morning she's the a picture of health and vitality .

Dh has taken along the pictures to show the gp though so I hope he's ready for a slide show of misery

Im sure your Dh will be swiping and pointing

My dh talks ALOT for his job, I actually pity the gp a little .....

I've only read the first page, but this sounds so much like cows milk protein allergy, which can easily be rectified with neocate milk on prescription. Obviously you then have to keep them off anything containing milk when weaning, but It is so worth it to get rid of the symptoms (I talk from experience!)
Really hope you get further referrals from your GP today. I think you need to be referred to a Paed who can then look at the options such as a different formula.

I hope you get the help you need for your baby and yourself.

Crucu- I don't know she has red hair and very fair skin which I know from experience of my other kids is slightly more delicate that normal but throw is ridiculous.

Anyone who works in operating theatres will tell you red heads bleed more.

Is she on cow's milk? It might be worth trying something else - others on here will have more experience.

Oh and YANBU - your little girl has two parents, there is no reason only one is responsible for childcare - you need a break and you need his support.

Fingers crossed for you it sounds miserable all round. My sister spent most of her childhood with these sorts of issues and when they finally did allergy testing on her she was allergic to every single thing they tested out of 80 things. Asthma, Exzema (Sp) and allergies all caused her terrible chest infections, thinning of the skin (hydro-cortisone does this so care with overuse of this). But I would cut every thing back to the least allergenic possible so milk, rusk or any other solids, wash powders (make sure non bio too) keep everywhere really clean as dust is another allergenic, use mattress protector on her bed etc and go from there, keep her hands in gloves or these arm things that seem to be around now - at night and I would even think about some of these air purifiers as well if it might help

Further to that you also need to look after yourself - eating, time out and the amount you are doing. With six kids there are things they can be doing to cut down on your work load etc and even if Hubby works long hours he can NOT create work as well as being helpful when home. You can't keep on ou will break if somethings dont change

lol well they are back. The doctor gave his moisterizer. He didn't really seem to want to discuss anything else and so now I have to put this on her for a while to see if it helps.

I actually feel like crying

Your GP is a waste of time.
Self refer to a private pediatrician.
Just pick one off the net that's local to you and ring for an appointment.
Best £140 or so you will ever spend.

I did this with DD when she had multiple adverse reactions to immunization injections - the guy was great.

Oh god. this sounds terrible :(

dd was cmpi and the dry flaky skim and the congestion and irritability sounds very similar.

what cream.did he give you?

you can get the private doc to recommend a prescription, and write to your GP for them to write it out so you can get it on the NHS.

It is aveeno moisterizer

Aveeno is good stuff and will soothe the skin but it won't rectify the problem

Well it's one if the better ones then. nut as was just said it won't solve the problem u til they listen to the rest of what yku have to say.

can you change practices or afford a private appointment?

Both mine were allergic to cows milk and eggs. We went to soya formula which we got on prescription - this was 15 years ago so things may have changed as to what else is available. They had terrible eczema also. And asthma.

In the end we paid for a private consultation with a dermatology specialist. The thing that helped the most with the eczema was him recommending the wet wrapping technique - was never as bad again.

15 or so years later the cows milk is fine, the eggs still problematic and the asthma has gone in one ds and the other has it mildly. They still get eczema but we manage it with hydrocortisone cream and diprobase.

Sothis, how's your health visitor?

We found out about ds's cmpa when weaning; he got hives all over his face from dairy products and his eczema flared up. Suddenly all the reflux, rashes (for which we were also given cream) and screaming of the past 6 months made sense.

I went to the doctor and told him I was going back to work (bf) so was planning to introduce some formula, but that since ds reacted to dairy surely we would need an alternative. He told me to go away and try the different formulas because he might not react to one. I blindly set about following his advice. This would far more traumatic and expensive than I realised.

After 48hrs and only 2 8 ounce bottles of formula I rushed ds to my walk-in child health clinic as he was teary, vomitting, covered in the eczema we'd finally managed to control - even all over his face, and extremely lethargic; just lying there, not cooing, not grabbing his feet, just staring and whimpering. The health visitor immediately referred us to a paediatric allergy specialist at the hospital who called within 24hrs. She told us not even to bother going back to the gp.

Perhaps your hv would be able to push for you?