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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

She did look a bit like a bag lady.

212 replies

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 16:25

A well-dressed bag lady

If you go against a dress code people WILL comment.
It's an occasion when everybody dresses up to the nines, men and woman.
There's a dress code.

So, if you rock up wearing a scruffy, unfeminine leather jacket and bulky scarf ensemble, then people are going to comment.
When I saw her, my immediate thought was ''wtf is she dressed like that''.
She was obviously trying to prove a point. What that was, God only knows.

Stephen Fry was only saying what most people were all thinking.

OP posts:
gooseberryroolz · 15/02/2016 18:13

Try not to get so upset.

Why do goady fuckers ALWAYS say that? (And never when there seems to be actual high feeling.) Confused

NinjaLeprechaun · 15/02/2016 18:14

"Wasn't there some ridiculous story about a woman being refused entry to some event because she didn't have high heels on?"
It's fairly standard for men to be refused entry to certain places if they're not wearing a tie, I imagine that most people would see this as comparable in terms of 'dressing up'. Although I don't think wearing a tie makes it much harder to walk in a straight line.

Helmetbymidnight · 15/02/2016 18:16

I'm not upset. Nor do I think she cares what anyone thinks.

(Although I wonder why someone who is not even an actress is held up to your scrutiny. Why does winning an award - for your work behind the scenes - mean you should suddenly dress like Judi Dench?)

I'm here because your opinions are making you look a special kind of stupid.

ToastDemon · 15/02/2016 18:16

How are heels comparable to wearing a tie though? Ties don't make it impossible for some people to walk.

NotJanine · 15/02/2016 18:16

We'll as a result of this, I have looked up Jenny beaven and see that she is extremely successful. 1 Oscar and numerous nominations.

I think she will have a whole new band of fans rooting for her at this year's Oscars.

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:16

and calling someone a Goady Fucker isn't a cheap shot? Hmm

OP posts:
Moln · 15/02/2016 18:17

That's funny DingleberryFinn. And quite telling too.

PerspicaciaTick · 15/02/2016 18:18

It was Cannes where women were reporting being denied entry for not wearing high heels. Those apparently turned away included women in their 50s with medical conditions and a woman who had half her foot amputated. They chose to wear sparkly flats instead of heels.

Narp · 15/02/2016 18:18

Dingleberry

That video is great. So telling that he thought the interviewer was 'on something' to be asking those questions

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:18

Yes, she's probably become hugely popular thanks to SF.
I'd never heard of her before.
Now I have.

OP posts:
gooseberryroolz · 15/02/2016 18:19

You outed yourself as a goady fucker with the 'don't get upset' line, TBF (if not long before) Smile

Narp · 15/02/2016 18:19

Every cloud, eh?

Maybe that was her intention all along....

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:20

Perspecaia, that's really bad.
I agree, If someone has a medical condition they shouldnt have to wear high heels to gain entry.

OP posts:
Foginthehills · 15/02/2016 18:21

Why wouldn't you want to look your best? By looking feminine ?

Your logic is all kinds of wrong. Best = feminine ? Just so blinkered.

And Stephen Fry hardly looks smart himself. That baggy velvet jacket.

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:22

Yes, that jacket was a sickly looking green.

OP posts:
ToastDemon · 15/02/2016 18:24

I don't think anyone should have to wear high heels ever, for anything, unless they choose to.

Moln · 15/02/2016 18:25

Rebel's comment was tweeted about; however due to the fact she didn't go on Twitter and call people names and flounce, the tweets about her didn't get much attention. If Stephen Fry had mange to keep his first tweet to "sorry everyone, she's a friend and it's an in joke!! Here's us look chummy' or similar this entire episode wouldn't have happened.

There's even a newspaper article about her and what she said.

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:25

I wonder what they class as a high heel Confused

I can't walk in anything higher than two inches.

OP posts:
PerspicaciaTick · 15/02/2016 18:26

Would they need to be able to prove the medical condition to the door staff? What if they just preferred flats but didn't have a medical reason?

Foginthehills · 15/02/2016 18:27

OP you might like to educate yourself about a campaign a lot of high-flyers in the film industry are taking on

#askhermore

therepresentationproject.org/askhermore-how-the-media-talks-to-women-on-the-red-carpet/

Owllady · 15/02/2016 18:28

She's a costume designer, I'm sure she knows more than most of us regarding history of cloth and fashion and the technical detail
She made a choice. It is allowed

Helmetbymidnight · 15/02/2016 18:29

Ah so now Stephen Fry made the bag-ladies career?

Jaysus.

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:29

Thankyou Foginthehills, that looks like interesting reading Smile

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 15/02/2016 18:31

It doesn't matter what anyone thinks of the way she dresses - Stephen Fry, as the host of the night, was really rude to make a negative comment like that about her. She obviously wasn't 'in on the joke' as she wasn't on the stage when he said it. She didn't know she was going to win, so it's not as though he'd said to her, "Oh when you're on the stage I'm going to mention the fact you look like a bag lady" and they both had a good laugh about it.

hefzi · 15/02/2016 18:32

gooseberry yes - but for some reason, you don't say "bag gentlemen" when it's men doing it.

It's not uncommon, unfortunately, and like Owl says, there's very often a tragedy behind it: they are often similar to compulsive hoarders, in terms of collecting everything as they go about their day, but without anywhere to put it, obviously. So they carry it about with them, often in shopping trollies or supermarket trollies. There is a lady I used to know who used a shelter in my old town: she had been a stockbroker before the death of her child and subsequent breakdown.

She used to collect bags but also anything from the town's rubbish bins that looked as though it could be "useful" - so things like pieces of string and rubber bands, but not food wrappers. She died on the streets one winter: she was only 42, which is my age now, but looked at least 25 years older Sad

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