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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

She did look a bit like a bag lady.

212 replies

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 16:25

A well-dressed bag lady

If you go against a dress code people WILL comment.
It's an occasion when everybody dresses up to the nines, men and woman.
There's a dress code.

So, if you rock up wearing a scruffy, unfeminine leather jacket and bulky scarf ensemble, then people are going to comment.
When I saw her, my immediate thought was ''wtf is she dressed like that''.
She was obviously trying to prove a point. What that was, God only knows.

Stephen Fry was only saying what most people were all thinking.

OP posts:
NigellasGuest · 15/02/2016 17:46

They said on This Morning that Fry has now deleted his Twitter account again

Moln · 15/02/2016 17:46

I don't think he had enough bags to be a bag lady. Bet there's a minimum number of bags before you can qualify.

gooseberryroolz · 15/02/2016 17:47

Has he promised to keep it deleted this time?

The narcisstic petulance is getting tedious.

Fairyliz · 15/02/2016 17:48

I have a lovely bright pink silk cocktail dress. I would wear it to a wedding or the bafta's but not a funeral ( unless the deceased had requested pink). Surely it is disrespectful to go against the dress code? Saying I too important/can't be bothered about everyone else.
However I did think SF showed a total lack of manners saying anything. And yes I would critise his outfit he looked bizzare.

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 17:49

If she'd been collecting an award for sound design or something nobody would have mentioned it, but if I'd been in Fry's shoes I'd also have been sorely tempted to play on the ironic mismatch between her brilliant costume work for others and her lack of concern for her own appearance, especially if she was a mate. The important thing is that she's great at her job, which Fry said very clearly. Her scruffy appearance is trivial, and the people who are getting outraged on her behalf are playing the Daily Mail's game. It's fine for her to be scruffy and it's OK to point out that she's scruffy

Exactly.
She is clearly a very talented woman and eccentric enough to not really care what others think of her appearance.
Under the circumstances and considering the ocassion , Stephen Fry's comments were funny,
What's even funnier is how people are so outraged on her behalf, when she probably doesn't give a damn what he said.

They've taken something that was said in jest and twisted it out of proportion.

OP posts:
Helmetbymidnight · 15/02/2016 17:52

I'm not outraged by what he said- I'm responding to the bizarre criticisms that you have made.

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 15/02/2016 17:54

Owllady Nobody cares about the kittens Sad

DonkeyOaty · 15/02/2016 17:55

If SF has left twitter then that is one less twit allowing their thoughts to gambol untrammelled through the ether. Hurrah!

hefzi · 15/02/2016 17:56

I have long (since the 90s) found Mr Fry to be a smug, patronising twat. Why people blather on about him being a "national treasure" I have on idea - unless it's for his fantastic and well-publicised queeny huffs, of course

Why is no-one outraged on behalf of bag ladies? It's not very nice to cast out aspersions and make generalisations about the homeless and vulnerably housed Hmm

MysticMugBug · 15/02/2016 17:57

Yes, notJanine
It is nice to see someone breaking the mould and happy in their own skin whatever that might be.
OP, judging doesn't become you

serin · 15/02/2016 17:57

You are coming across as quite shallow OP.

As a costume designer she could probably have out dressed everyone at the ceremony.

But she refreshingly chose to wear what she wanted.

I have never understood the fuss about Stephen Fry, arrogant git.

gooseberryroolz · 15/02/2016 17:58

I'm not outraged on her behalf.

I'm bored to tears by HIS delight in his own rudeness.

gooseberryroolz · 15/02/2016 17:59

Oh a 'bag lady' is a homeless person hefzi?

I had no idea. This gets better and better Hmm

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:02

It's an awards ceremony. People discuss what other people wore.
It's what happens.
Every year.
We are discussing what this woman wore.

That makes all of us shallow. Hmm

OP posts:
gooseberryroolz · 15/02/2016 18:03

You're not just discussing hollow. You're being hugely judgemental and dictatorial (and bloody rude) about her clothing.

ToastDemon · 15/02/2016 18:03

Maybe one day in the far, distant future, women won't get scrutinised relentlessly on their appearance regardless of their real achievements.
But that day is a long way off - it certainly won't arrive while hollowlegs is around.

PerspicaciaTick · 15/02/2016 18:06

hollow, your OP does sound quite cross about her choice of clothes rather than amused by SF's witty comments.

DingleberryFinn · 15/02/2016 18:07

Seems about time to wheel this video out again:

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:07

Oh rubbish.
Try not to get so upset.
I'm sure these people don't really care what we think.

They expect to get discussed, it goes with the territory.

Everybody has said she has done well to achieve her award despite dressing like a bag lady to collect it

OP posts:
LadyIsabellaWrotham · 15/02/2016 18:10

I agree Perspicacia. My instinctive stance is that it doesn't matter what she looks like because she doesn't make her living based on her looks, so calling her scruffy isn't an important insult, it's just interesting in the light of her profession. But that's kind of undermined if people like the OP are actully offended by any decision not to wear the sort of frock that Dame Judy would find appropriate.

hollowlegs · 15/02/2016 18:10

No, not cross at all about her choice of clothes.

OP posts:
ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 15/02/2016 18:11

I'm sure she put a lot of thought into her outfit to make a statement that she was above dressing up for such an occasion. All pretentious crap.

Lweji · 15/02/2016 18:12

Quite frankly I find seminude actresses worse than a leather jacket.

Owllady · 15/02/2016 18:13

When i used to live in a mid staffs town, there was a homeless lady who you would see with a trolley full of bags. Apparently she had a breakdown after her only child diex. I then moved down south and the city i movex to had a very similar lady whoused to sleep by the river and she had become homeless after losing her son too. Very sad

So from a serious pov. Not pc gone mad. It might be best to consider the language used anyway as it is loaded with connotations. Stephen is an intelligent man, he doesnt need someone off the internet with a measly textiles degree to point this out. Anyway, i have heard donald trump has turned off his internet

bakeoffcake · 15/02/2016 18:13

Is a dress code sent out to the quests? I expect not.

Whatever the case is, i how she's set a new trend and lots of people turn up wearing what they like, next year.

I thought Rebel Wilsons racist comment to Idris Elba were more worthy of any comment tbh. But nobody seems bothered about thatHmm

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