To think children need a father in order to thrive?

[Jellybeam]

...in life?

Aibu to think that children who don't have their biological father present in their childhood end up with a heap of problems during childhood and throughout the rest of their lives.

How can anyone be happy not knowing who made them? My dad was there from birth until my late teens, I have a 6 week DD and her dad is abusive and I want to leave but I worry she will grow up with problems due to not really knowing her father. I know staying with her dad will mean she ends up with even bigger issues, but I can't help but feel she'll be missing on having a dad

Yes sometimes, but when a woman has three children to three different fathers and then gets herself ink another unstable volatile relationship and becomes pregnant again, then that's not acceptable, and i'f feel nothing but sorry for the poor kids.

but children need a male role model which fulfills a distinct role to that of the mother.

I'm stuffed then. My father died when I was two, 50 years ago, and I have never had a male role model :(

Or...
hence why I don't agree with MEN who have children to multiple WOMEN when they aren't in stable relationships (usually were the dad leaves).

should have emboldened the first sentence. Amazingly I am reasonably well adjusted!

In fact, the problem is not women who have children with multiple men, it's those men fucking off and not having any more contact with the children or being abusive about it.

The problem is not the mothers who actually take care of the children, it's the absent or abusive fathers. Surely that's easy to understand

I would call such a woman an eternal optimist who is trying to see the best in men but has unfortunately got a faulty 'picker' when it comes to seeing abusive traits. The fault lies with the abusive behaviour of the men, which if it were to change, would lead to the woman being in a stable relationship not leaving/trying again.

when a woman has three children to three different fathers and then gets herself ink another unstable volatile relationship and becomes pregnant again, then that's not acceptable, and i'f feel nothing but sorry for the poor kids.

and the fathers take no responsibility for this, I assume?

Is contraception just the responsibility of women then MrBean?

I must have missed that memo.

I think threads like this are quite offensive to single parents, whether meant that way or not.

I left DSs dad 3 years ago, DS has not seen him since. I left when I realised if I stayed my baby would watch his daddy kill his mommy. How can anyone really think that would be better for a child than me raising him alone?
As it is, DS is 3.9 and yesterday a total stranger approached me in soft play to tell me how lovely DS is and that I'd obviously done a wonderful job raising him. I can't even begin to explain how touched I was, especially with there being the assumption that DS would be better off if I'd stayed with his father.

Children can certainly miss out if they don't have 'good' father's in their lives. Not so much abusive men.

I wish my parents had of split up earlier tbh
My stepdad is wonderful, much more of a dad than my own (estranged) father. I'd like to tell you I've been unaffected by not having my dad in my life, but I haven't, but I think it's more to do with his treatment and abandonment of me rather than him not being there

Obviously it take two to tango and all that, but there are options when a woman gets pregnant you know.

MrBean what the fuck?
Are you suggesting a woman should abort her baby rather than raise it as a single parent?!

MrBean, are you fucking serious?!

Exposing a DC to DV is emotional abuse.

Not having a dad isn't any kind of abuse.

I never had a Father. My Mum left him when I was 6 mths old.
He never had any contact and lived in a different country. There was never any financial support either. I never had a father figure.
There were times in my childhood that I wished I was like my friends. They all had a Mum and Dad at home.
But I feel I had a good childhood overall.
I did thrive. I am happy.
I have a great job that I enjoy, a lovely husband, nice home and 2 children. We have a great family dynamic.
I have been successful and so has my Sister.
My Father was abusive, I would rather live in a single parent family than live in a home with an abusive man.

My SiL has five children to four different men, none were abusive as such but their relationships were volatile at times (more due to my SiL if you ask me). None of the fathers are involved in my nieces and nephews lives and I feel terrible for them, they all have challenging behaviour due to having no boundaries and the eldest two have even been expelled from school. But to speak to my SiL she feels no remorse what so ever for giving her children such an unstable family life, she just plods on and drags her kids up hoping things will be ok.

Always refreshing to see ad hominem attacks being thrown around when people have lost all ability to engage in rational debate.

Oh, fuck off MrBean.

Clearly a goady fucker.

Always nice to see MRA dickheads popping up where they're not welcome.

I actually never said abortion, did I? What I am saying is that people like my SiL well they weren't forced into bad relationship after bad relationship, she chose it and she chose to continue to have children whilst in these unstable circumstances.

Challenging behaviour may be caused by a lack of boundaries, but single parents are actually capable of providing boundaries

So you're taking ONE example of someone who may have poor parenting skills and deciding that ALL women with children from more than one father are the same as her?
Classic. Total rubbish.

I'm "clearly a goody fucker" what for saying what I think, really?