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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that my friend should be working?

257 replies

Louboutin37 · 07/02/2016 13:02

I'll give you the scenario. Mate is divorced, single mum to 2 kids. Maintenance all agreed and pretty generous with her ex, youngest child is 12.

We were chatting the other day and I mentioned to her that she must be excited about going back to work full time soon. (She works 2 days a week at the mo and claims tax credits)

She replied with "but I can't go back to work, I'm a single mum and the state recognises that I need to be at home to support my babies".

AIBU to think that she doesn't have babies and in her situation should be thinking about getting back to work by now? She seems to think that as she doesn't see herself as in benefits then there's no issue.

PS, this isn't a benefits slating at all.

OP posts:
dementedpixie · 07/02/2016 13:05

I think it's none of your business.

moopymoodle · 07/02/2016 13:06

It's none of your bloody business. She's already working, who are you to say how many hours she should work.

AlwaysHopeful1 · 07/02/2016 13:07

You sound very jealous of her. I can't think of any reason why it's your business that you feel she needs to go back to work. Really, what does it have to do with you?

DoesAnyoneReadTheseThings · 07/02/2016 13:07

With friends like you...

Finola1step · 07/02/2016 13:07

She works. She has dc. Just because they are not little, it doesn't mean that they don't need her. Leave her be.

reallybadidea · 07/02/2016 13:08

Not worth stressing about. Once universal credit comes in then she will have to work anyway. Concentrate on your own life and how you can improve it instead of looking at other people.

gingerboy1912 · 07/02/2016 13:08

But she does workHmm.

sugar21 · 07/02/2016 13:08

None of your bloody business. Is your friend a Mner, maybe she will recognise her details on here?

bibbitybobbityyhat · 07/02/2016 13:08

Did she really describe her children as babies?

I tend to agree with you - I just think its better to work than not. And so many people would love to be able to work and cannot for whatever reason.

Aeroflotgirl · 07/02/2016 13:09

Yabvvvu, you don't sound like much of a friend!

TrinityForce · 07/02/2016 13:09

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Aeroflotgirl · 07/02/2016 13:10

She could have other issues which your not aware about affecting her working full time.

timelytess · 07/02/2016 13:10

Not your business.

KaraokeQueenOfTheNorth · 07/02/2016 13:11

Why would she be "excited" at getting back to work full time? That is just a thinly veiled way of making a dig at her!

It really isn't your business how many hours she works outside of the home, is it?

WorraLiberty · 07/02/2016 13:11

I'm not sure if the word 'babies' was thrown in by her to wind you up, or thrown in by you, to wind Mumsnet up Wink

Either way it's none of your business.

IguanaTail · 07/02/2016 13:11

Maybe she's not keen on working and has enough money not to bother.

ilovesooty · 07/02/2016 13:11

As a previous poster said she may not have the choice as benefit changes take hold.

Not your business though.

expatinscotland · 07/02/2016 13:11

None of your business. You said to me more than once we'd no longer be friends.

VoldysGoneMouldy · 07/02/2016 13:11

Who needs enemies with a support network like yours?

bornwithaplasticspoon · 07/02/2016 13:12

Teenagers need time and attention too.

TurnOffTheTv · 07/02/2016 13:12

But she is working? Why do you think she should go full time?

BackInTheRealWorld · 07/02/2016 13:13

What's so exciting about working full time? I work full time and I'm struggling to see the thrill tbh

walkinginmercury · 07/02/2016 13:13

I mentioned to her that she must be excited about going back to work full time soon.

I genuinely chuckled at this Grin

CheesyNachos · 07/02/2016 13:13

none of your business at all.

Anyway, where are all these full time jobs that people are supposed to be getting?

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 07/02/2016 13:14

To be honest I don't see why those with older kids should actively choose to work less hours and be topped up by tax credits. But people won't be able to make these life choices soon and get subsidised by the state