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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Dog shit on your shoes is your own problem?

168 replies

JustAnotherYellowBelly · 07/02/2016 11:29

Hoping you ladies will help strengthen my resolve...
Bit of background:
Moved back in with DM at the end of last year in lots of debt no necessarily of my making (twatty ex). Me, 2 DDogs.
'D'p stays over roughly 6 out of 7 nights, pays no rent etc. I feed him, buy him stuff, pay for fuel (last week his £10 petrol cost me £50 as the bank ate his money - I didn't moan as he's on a 0 hours contract but he hasn't paid me back like he said he would... But anyway)
This morning DM thought that DDDog had a mouse so she called DP to go check. On his way to the end of the garden he stepped in dog poo. He came back to bed and told me I would be the one cleaning it off his shoe as they're my dogs.
I was still half asleep and laughed and said fuck off. I would never ever usually speak to him like this but he woke me up.
AIBU to not do it? They're his trainers. If they were his work shoes I would help him (which means I would end up doing it).
So who's BU?

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 07/02/2016 11:33

I don't see the difference between his trainers and his work shoes.

PrincessHairyMclary · 07/02/2016 11:33

You are being unreasonable for being with a cocklodger. What do you get out of the relationship?

NickNacks · 07/02/2016 11:33

You are. Pick up after your dogs, it's disgusting.

youdontknowmebut · 07/02/2016 11:35

YABU. It's disgusting to not pick up your dogs shit.

LaurieFairyCake · 07/02/2016 11:35

Your poor mum. You've landed her with your boyfriend there all the time plus dogs that shit everywhere.

Dump the boyfriend. Get out of bed and clean up everything so your poor mum doesn't have to.

Your life sounds like a chaotic pile of bollocks.

JustAnotherYellowBelly · 07/02/2016 11:36

We do pick up the poo daily but it had happened between yesterday evening and this morning.
We're not that bad!

OP posts:
youdontknowmebut · 07/02/2016 11:37

I wouldn't clean his shoes either, he sounds like he is taking you for a fool. I wouldn't let anyone live with me Scott free.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 07/02/2016 11:37

Would I clean dog shit off a capable adult's shoes for them? Go on, guess.

I'd throw them in the bloody bin and repeat the 'fuck off' in case he hadn't heard you.

JustAnotherYellowBelly · 07/02/2016 11:37

I don't really know the difference between his shoes... Except I guess I'd want his work shoes to look nice?

OP posts:
Pipbin · 07/02/2016 11:37

So he lives rent free in your mother's house?
Dog shit on his shoe is the last of your problems.

Arfarfanarf · 07/02/2016 11:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jevoudrais · 07/02/2016 11:38

I think you are a bit. Why wasn't the poo picked up? Unless it had just been done in which case that's bad luck to stand in the one single dog poo in the whole of the garden. He was doing you a favour really so you didn't have to check if your dog had a mouse, wasn't he?

If my OH did this, he would probably clean it himself (I say probably, I would do a better job of it so might tell him not to bother). But the dogs are our dogs, and we both pick up after them, so it would be both our fault.

Don't get me wrong he doesn't sound like a great catch from what you've said, but in your position, I would probably have offered to do it. The fact he demanded it would get my back up though, so I can see why you feel as you do.

expatinscotland · 07/02/2016 11:38

If I were your mum and kick you and your cocklodging BF out. And your dogs that you don't clean up after, too. Your poor mum.

coconutpie · 07/02/2016 11:39

YANBU, what are you - his slave? He should have watched where he was walking. You moved in with your DM because you were heavily in debt because of a twatty ex and yet you are doing the same here by buying him food, petrol etc? And he stays at your DM's house 6 nights a week? Dump him and sort out your money problems.

JustAnotherYellowBelly · 07/02/2016 11:39

And it works out quite well as I pay a standing amount that is more than half the bills. I cook for us, DM cooks for her.
We've always had dogs and mum really doesn't mind them - she buys them treats etc and got them more for Christmas than I did

OP posts:
SuperCee7 · 07/02/2016 11:39

He sounds like an arse but in this situation YABU. It's your dogs shit and you left it lying around. Clean his shoes.

Katenka · 07/02/2016 11:39

I can't believe the dog poo is a problem.

He lives rent free at your mums and. You pay for his stuff.

Why are you putting up with of this?

ilovesooty · 07/02/2016 11:39

I agree with expat quite frankly.

gamerchick · 07/02/2016 11:39

Yeah both of you aren't coming across very well. I'm with your mother. Tell the freeloader to go home and sort out the garden so there's no crap lying about.

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 07/02/2016 11:40

Your mum sounds like she's putting up with a lot. Buy her some flowers and tell him to stop bloody sponging.

Bunbaker · 07/02/2016 11:41

I think your parents have to put up with a lot. Not everyone would be happy to house two dogs.

I'm on the fence with this one because cleaning up after your dogs is your responsibility, but your dad should have looked where he was going.

Do you pay your parents any board and why are they hosting your partner 6 nights out of 7? What does this partner bring to your relationship?

ilovesooty · 07/02/2016 11:41

Why are you paying to keep him while you've moved in with your mother because you have debts?

Hassled · 07/02/2016 11:42

If you didn't know that your DP is massively taking advantage of your and your mum's goodwill, then you wouldn't be posting. The shoe-shit would be a non-issue which you would have resolved without appealing to MN. You posted because he's taking the piss in many different ways and this is just one of them. So - what do you want to happen?

Pipbin · 07/02/2016 11:42

And it works out quite well as I pay a standing amount that is more than half the bills.

But he is still living there rent free.

ilovesooty · 07/02/2016 11:44

Where does he sleep on the seventh night?

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