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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

giving a baby a biscuit

359 replies

Lolly1984 · 02/02/2016 14:43

My ds, 7 months came with me to a return to work chat, unofficial. Nice colleague said she'd look after him in office.
Come back to find hes had some banana and a shortcake biscuit.
Not a massive problem, but hes 7 months, and I'm not happy hes had something sweet. Hes also allergic to dairy so now I have a sad, spotty baby with tummy ache.
I didn't say anything coz she's the kind of person to get upset, crocodile tears, and tell everyone her mistake.
But now I'm home I'm fuming!
Aibu?! Who gives a baby a biscuit without checking with parent?!

OP posts:
TheCatsMeow · 03/02/2016 09:50

Musk hope you feel better soon! And have one of your avocados Grin

Gileswithachainsaw · 03/02/2016 09:50

Not when it's a baby it's not.

if I'm. baby sitting I ask feed times and what they like etc

if I'm. just holding a baby fir a few mins feeding doesn't even cross my mind. especially if I haven't checked with parents

We afebt even talking about a visit where yiu would perhaps expect it.

we are talking what is basically a quick cuddle in an office. and no I would not expect to have what is still a small baby who could well not even be on solids ( dd2 barely ate til 8/9 months) given any food whatsoever. biscuit or organic rice cakes.

.

Whatthefreakinwhatnow · 03/02/2016 09:51

I reeeeeeally fancy a hobnob and a cup of tea now! 😂 I think I'll take DD1 for tea and cake after school, we've not been in a while and I think it's time I damaged her health and future career prospects further than I have already with an iced finger! Grin

TheCatsMeow · 03/02/2016 09:51

I think it'd be unusual for a 7 month old to not have any food at all Giles. Did your DD not eat anything?

Whatthefreakinwhatnow · 03/02/2016 09:53

catsmeow do you wanna come too? 😀

Muskateersmummy · 03/02/2016 09:53

Thanks cats

Giles, that's fab but you can't assume that everyone thinks about things the same way you do. It was 15mins, not a quick cuddle to my mind. If I left my dd with someone I would have told them and I didn't want them to give her something I would have a) said something, b) left something they could give her. You can't be annoyed if you didn't give the person caring for your child the information.

Gileswithachainsaw · 03/02/2016 09:56

She grabbed a few things here and there. she liked to play and she liked to suck a bit but she wasn't eating meals til 8/9 months.

the point is unless you k ow the babies exact age and whether or not they are on food or what they are allowed you just don't feed without asking.

the food could be anything it's not about biscuits vs broccoli. it's about strange notions that the second you are around a child the only thing to do is feed them to keep them quiet. even if they are quiet already

Sparrowlegs248 · 03/02/2016 09:56

Id be annoyed if someone gave my baby AnY food without checking first. He's 6.5 months and has only recently started solids. I wouldn't give him a biscuit because i don't want him to have them just yet, and because who knows if he would choke or react to it? He's had two scary choking incidents so far. I would never presume to feed another persons baby .

UmbongoUnchained · 03/02/2016 09:57

My mum never let me have sugar or unhealthy food growing up. I never had a takeaway till I was 15 and I had moved out!
Naturally I developed bulimia, because as soon as I had my own money or the foods that I wasn't allowed were available, I binged. At kids party's I would just stand next to the table and gorge myself.
I still hate eating now, and feel guilty when I eat and can't eat after 6pm because I used to get told off for that as a child. My DD eats whatever she wants because I know she has 3 healthy and balanced meals a day. The odd ice cream, cake or milkshake doesn't bother me. And even now at 18 months, she has the will power to just have 1 or 2 chocolate buttons from the bowl and leave the rest.

Whatthefreakinwhatnow · 03/02/2016 10:02

unbongo Sad

Well done for raising your DD with a sensible,moderate approach to food. You are absolutely doing the right thing.

maybebabybee · 03/02/2016 10:05

Cats there is a lot of non-biscuit food out there for your baby to try. Avocado?

Think that's probably the most middle class thing I've ever seen on here. And I had avocado on toast for breakfast this morning.

3phase · 03/02/2016 10:06

Someone stuck a Wotsit in my 11 week old's mouth once. I'd left him in a carseat at a table in a restaurant with a group of friends while I nipped to the loo and someone I didn't know that well did it. She actually said she thought Wotsits were a really good food to start weaning with!

I was a bit aghast and took the offending crisp off him but ultimately he was fine OP. I chose to leave him and not take him to the loo with me so my bad, surely?

I think you're BU.

Oh and like the poster above, my Mum was really anal about giving us any junk. My brother and I used to gorge ourselves at parties and even fill our pockets with take home snacks. Not cool.

BathshebaDarkstone · 03/02/2016 10:07

Is your DS your pfb. Lighten up. And tell people about his allergy. DS1 has cystic fibrosis, he was diagnosed when he was 5, he told people he could only eat fat if he took his medication. It's your job to tell people when he can't speak for himself. Hmm

AppleSetsSail · 03/02/2016 10:12

Think that's probably the most middle class thing I've ever seen on here. And I had avocado on toast for breakfast this morning.

I'd love an eye-roll emoticon here. Let the working-class babies eat wotsits.

TheCatsMeow · 03/02/2016 10:26

What I'll come Grin

Yes Apple anyone working class feeds their babies wotsits...

AppleSetsSail · 03/02/2016 10:41

Yes Apple anyone working class feeds their babies wotsits...

Yes Cats that was precisely my point.

kali110 · 03/02/2016 10:53

cats this has seriouslycheered me up to read this morning!
How did i manage to be an a size 8 till i were 20 as my awful awful larents allowed me to have the odd treats as a child?
My 33 yo mate is still the size of a twig Grin
My mate who was banned however has struggled all her life.

kali110 · 03/02/2016 10:55

UmbongoUnchained i'm really sorry you feel like that. You sound really good with your dd though x

AppleSetsSail · 03/02/2016 11:05

Dear me is it the invasion of the nethuns here? X

maybebabybee · 03/02/2016 11:22

You completely missed my point cats but by all means roll your eyes at me.

If I fancied a biccie and someone offered me an avocado I'd be Hmm

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 03/02/2016 11:35

I really think this is not so much to do with which children are permitted sugars or unhealthy foods, as much as feeding a 7-month old baby something which was not required, and without checking with the Mum first.

My children ate all sorts of unhealthy crap (and still do), alongside the healthy stuff (Wotsits and avocados galore). Everything in moderation. They are absolutely fine, thanks very much. Slim, fit, healthy, blah blah blah. DD is a swimming teacher, DS has an active, physical job. They both love healthy foods. They also love unhealthy foods. That's life, they are making their own choices.

IMHO this is not healthy v unhealthy, it is simply someone feeding a young baby with something during a 15-min 'cuddle' without first checking to see if it was okay with the Mum.
The Mum was not looking for free childcare, the colleague held the baby for approx. 15 mins (from what I can gather). No need to feed that baby with anything at all during that time. As a Mum with a child with allergies, I would not think to mention to someone who may have held her for 15 mins at the age of 7 months not to give her anything to eat. It wouldn't cross most sensible people's minds.

We have lots of little visitors - it would not ever occur to me to feed any of those little people with something without first checking with their parent/carer.

This is the point trying to be made - not sugar v no sugar. This is the point that some posters appear to be missing.

MitzyLeFrouf · 03/02/2016 11:36

Does it matter? I think the OP is over it now.

EvansOvalPiesYumYum · 03/02/2016 11:41

OP might be, but others appear not to be.
So clearly it does matter.
Is this you being the board police and closing comments down now? Smile

MitzyLeFrouf · 03/02/2016 11:42

Possibly.

If it gets any duller I'll ask HQ to wind it up.

bruffin · 03/02/2016 11:42

The point you are missing are pa4emts are getting so much more controlling. This type of thing ueef to be norm and parents would be grateful. I am so glad my dc are grown up now. Theee kids with controlling parents are turning into nightmares, because its not just about food, its about being told off etc and they think if a teacher tells them off they can go tunning to parents who willl sort teacher out.