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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To spend some of the kids' Christmas money on a meal out?

339 replies

Happythistime · 27/01/2016 17:34

Can't decide whether this sits right with me or not.

We are thinking of taking the kids to the Rainforest Cafe at the weekend. It is super expensive due to its central London location and themed interior. I want us to go and not wince at the prices and I know the kids will love it so am toying with using a little bit of their Christmas money that they've received from relatives to go towards the bill.

I think that if Christmas money I had given to a child went towards a nice day out, be it a meal or a show or something similar I'd be happy with that. Usually we just put their gift money straight into savings as they have more toys than they need. A bit of me worries though that people would see it as me and DH profiting from their xmas presents. We would obviously pay the bulk of it and only put a bit of their money towards enabling us to go and enjoy it without feeling resentful at the prices. AIBU?

OP posts:
MrsJayy · 27/01/2016 19:01

You are thinking in terms of stuff kids don't need to spend money on stuff a day out is a nice thing to do go have a nice time

whois · 27/01/2016 19:02

kids forget stuff. We took dd to Florida at 5. She doesn't remember

I have vivid memories of holidays younger than 5!

Wiki reckons children from as young as 2 develop autobiographical memories. You do need to help this be retained long term - talking about the experience later, looking at photos, other holiday things.

Throwingshade · 27/01/2016 19:03

I wouldn't, no. But it does partly depend on your personal finances. If this is the only way to have a day out or a special meal, then maybe. However if I'd asked my dc at any age if they wanted to go out for a meal, let alone, pay for it with Christmas money they would have said a big fat NO! They couldn't be arsed to sit still and eat when they were younger, a meal isn't a treat, whether it's in RFC cafe or not.

Artandco · 27/01/2016 19:04

If your going to natural history museum your close to harrods. I would take them to harrods ice cream parlour instead ( book table in advance) on 4th floor.
Remember to book tickets if you want to see the dinosaurs at museum

Shesinfashion · 27/01/2016 19:04

I wouldn't. We've been to the rainforest cafe and it really is just an overpriced restaurant. Your kids would probably prefer a Happy meal just as much.

Shesinfashion · 27/01/2016 19:04

Should have said overpriced burger joint.

MrsJayy · 27/01/2016 19:06

Memories and experience s are really important for children mine are adults and they will say do you remember when we did this or that it's really nice to chat about

Shesinfashion · 27/01/2016 19:06

We have borrowed our children's Xmas and birthday money on occasions during those waiting for payday days. We always replace it as soon as possible and use it for things like petrol, top up shopping etc.

tibbawyrots · 27/01/2016 19:07

Why not use their money for the entrance to the natural history museum instead? The money you save from that then goes towards the meal. That might make your feel more comfortable about it.

Free entrance... Grin

mouldycheesefan · 27/01/2016 19:07

If the kids have spare money, keep it for the future years when they are doing swimming, football, rugby, karate, musical Instruments etc etc etc it all adds up, extra curricular activities are very expensive. Good use of gift money in my opinion. A burger, not so much.

Muskateersmummy · 27/01/2016 19:09

Ha ha ... Shows how often I make it down to the big smoke!!

Hulababy · 27/01/2016 19:09

If I had given money for Christmas I would far rather it went towards a day out for the children than go into a savings account.

Infect, because I don't want it to just go into the bank its why I try to never just give money - always an actual gift or voucher.

Hulababy · 27/01/2016 19:14

We've been to three RFC - Floras, Vegas and London.

The food is, imo, not bad, Its no worse than any of the other burger/American style chains. Yes, it is expensive for what it is but ime the children love the whole rainforest bit and the animals, etc. and even the shop attached.

It certainly hasn't been dire when we've been. But then, although I love eating out and we eat out loads and in a range of venues of varying prices, I'm no food snob.

northdownmummy · 27/01/2016 19:14

I think it's a lovely idea, experiences and the opportunity to make wonderful memories of a fun family day will last longer than stuff and mean more than a top up to their savings

Jw35 · 27/01/2016 19:15

I don't get the angst! The kids will enjoy it so why not? Confused Kids don't need money or loads of toys.

I like the rainforest cafe!

Julius02 · 27/01/2016 19:15

I think it's absolutely fine to do it - if I gave money to a child as a gift I would be very happy that it was spent on a treat or a trip for them.
I took a 4 year old to the Rainforest Cafe and he absolutely loved it. Go for it!

Grapejuicerocks · 27/01/2016 19:16

It's not just any old random meal. They are paying for the rainforest experience. That makes a world of difference.

Go for it, op.

Starbores · 27/01/2016 19:16

I would do this no problem. Much better to have a lovely family day out than more toys that they probably don't need.

Those saying they wouldn't like money they gift to be spent in this way should maybe consider buying a present if they feel that strongly on how the money is spent.

nancy75 · 27/01/2016 19:17

I don't care who the money belongs to, the rainforest cafe is the worst place I have ever eaten, even dd declared it to be rubbish! The food makes Burger King look Michelin starred, the place is dark, dingy and none too clean and the animals look moth eaten. The activity pack must cost all of a pound to put together. The only good bit is this shop and that is more overpriced than hamleys ( that takes some doing)

Hand on heart I can honestly say you would be better off eating an m&s sandwich on a park bench!

Hulababy · 27/01/2016 19:17

As for younger children not remembering things.

Well, firstly, many do. DD can definitely remember things from when she was younger than 5.

And tbh even if they don't remember - should we not do anything exciting with our little ones lest they forget. So long as they enjoy it at the time, isn't that what matters? And don't forget what an aid to memory a selection of photographs and repeated commentary alongside them can do.

AutumnLeavesArePretty · 27/01/2016 19:18

This is one of the reasons I've stopped giving cash or vouchers to children.

It's in lieu of a gift, not for mum and dad to have a meal out. Providing food is what parents do, if you want it from a restaurant then you pay not the children.

Katenka · 27/01/2016 19:20

And tbh even if they don't remember - should we not do anything exciting with our little ones lest they forget.

I said kids don't always remember. I didn't say you shouldn't bother though.

It was in response to the definite 'memories last a lifetime' my response was 'not always'

Dowser · 27/01/2016 19:22

Paying £17 for a burger! I'd need my head examined before I did that. A trip to the Harry potter studios seems a better way to spend the money.

NoSquirrels · 27/01/2016 19:22

Ach, do it.

The food is shit, to adult eyes it looks a bit tired and dated, but to kids of your DCs ages it is cool - the tropical rainstorm, the animals etc. My DC loved it when they went with relatives. It is not the same as a Nandos, Giraffe or MaccyD's, which you can get anywhere.

Spend the £15 per child and let them enjoy it. Let them spend another fiver in the shop too. Then let them write a postcard to the relatives whose cash you've spent saying thank you and what they did/got. If you were spending their entire Christmas cash on it, then maybe not, but really sounds fine to me. Too much guilt here from some people, surely. But then my parents growing up had us contribute to things that were optional but that we loved, and we actually felt quite grown up about it, so I don't see the problem.

Grapejuicerocks · 27/01/2016 19:23

So you buy a present autumn but the child may not be into that particular thing and the present may not be valued as much as an exciting meal in the RFC. might be. It's swings and roundabouts.

I agree if it is that important to you what they spend the money on, you should probably buy a present but be under no illusion that it will always be valued or appreciated.